Visual DNA.

Saw this at Art, Itchy and Orchids blog and decided to tag myself. Was fun doing it. Take a look. And take the tag if interested.

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Motherhood is...

... doing the dishes while carrying your toddler piggy-back.


ps.
The said toddler completed 22 months today. 2 more months to be 2. :)

Ashu and her books.

I wanted to bring all of Ashus books to Zurich from Bangalore more than her toys and clothes. English books are sold only in certain book shops and they are very expensive here. Finding a library and commuting might also be a problem. So I brought most of her books. (Remember the heavy fine for overweight baggage to Lufthansa? Now you know why.) I bought around 10 books just before coming to Zurich. My sister and friends have bought her loads of books. I also bought a few Tamil rhymes and alphabet books. So to cut the long story short, it seems like she has a million books now in her room. She has never seen them all together before. So the little Missy is happy beyond words. She wants to hold 4 books at a time and see pictures from all of them. She is also calling out letters like A, W, C, Q,... whenever she recognizes the letters. The other day she pointed out the word WILD in one of her books and said Dabbudabbu-I-Ellu-Dheeee and I almost had a heart attack. She has these flash cards with alphabets and pictures and madam can say all the 26 words now. Apple, Baoon, Cat, Doggeee, Naanai(for elephant), Fishy, Guita(r),Hat, Iggoo, Jar, Kite, Lemon, (she says tomato first and then when I ask her again she says Emon), Mitten, Nest(and immediately says "Kuvvi irukum" meaning "A bird lives in it"), Ottopus, Piggy, Qeen, Ring, Sun, (T)able, Umbella, Vioyeen, Dabbudabbu first and then Wagon, X(ray), Yoyo, Zeeba. And these flash cards I gave her only in the flight for the first time 3 weeks back. Of course she knew most of the words already having seen them in one or the other dozen alphabet books she has and the websites. Its hard to figure her out. She likes mostly picture books where she can point and say what they are or listens when I tell her what they are. But theres this Pooh story book she loves to look at and also lets me read it to her for few minutes. But she wants none of the nursery rhymes book to be read to her. Its OK if I sing to her when we are playing or I'm changing her diaper or dressing her up. But if I open the book and start singing a rhyme, she grabs it and closes it and says "Aachu" (finished) and keeps the book back in the shelf. I have to say it hurts my ego big time! Then there are these paper books which I keep on the top shelf as I'm afraid she ll tear them up. And those she loves needless to say. But I am always near her when she looks at them. Every time she turns the pages, I want to snatch the book from her and run as she creases the pages very badly. But then, these are her books. So I let it go! I know, I have a big heart! I bought two Noddy story books in Bangalore because she loves Noddy. I think I should prepare myself to accept him as my future son-in-law. Yes, that much lurve! Those are her favorites now. But we lost one in Ikea last week. So we are hanging on to the last Noddy we have currently!! My dad said he can courier a dozen Noddy books but I pretended not to hear him!

Anyway, I have a few Qs. Mommies help me out if you can.

1. So those nursery rhymes books are for the parents to memorize and sing to them later is it? Why is Ashu looking at me as if I'm copying in an exam when I sing the songs from the book? Or is it for older kids and shes trying to tell me that?

2. How does/did your toddler turn a paper page? This badly? Will she improve or should I hide the books which are MY favorites?

3. Ashu always likes it when I tell her a story in Tamil. So even when I read out from an English book, I tell her in Tamil after every sentence. Is that okay?

4. Whats with kids and animal pictures? She can say Iguana looking at a picture of Iguana and I have nt even heard of an Iguana before. But show her an Orange and she says Apple.

5. Do toddlers forget easily? I remember Ashu was doing this puzzle book with Numbers on them very easily. Now she does nt know how when she saw the book 4 months later. Does it mean I have to show those damn ABC flash cards to her every day? Let her as well learn in School then, whats the hurry? ;)

Is buying bin liners by myself a milestone too?

It has been very cold and windy in Zurich since the time I arrived. The only times we went out were either to Ikea or to a hospital. As if I need an excuse to stay home, just thinking about dressing up Ashu can put anyone off from going out! The tights over her diaper, then some thick pants, thermal top, turtle neck top, sleeveless sweater, the winter jacket, woolen cap, socks and then shoe. If she is nt crying her lungs out already, she will as soon as she sees the mittens. Putting her wriggly fingers inside the mittens and at the same time distracting her from crying should be listed under the Chinese torture methods. Then settling her in the stroller and strapping the belt.Two minutes later, shes trying to stand and crying again. Hd carries her while I push the empty stroller around. Frustrating! So yesterday Hd calls up from office and says what a wonderful sunny day it is.

Me: Is it?
(I open the shutters to see for myself.)
Why indeed, the sun is out! Is there anything else dear?
Hd: So why dont you go out?
Me: What? where?
Hd: Just for a walk woman.
Me: But why?
Hd: To get some fresh air.
Me: I can get that if I stand on the balcony, cant I?
Hd: Come on. Take Ashu and go out for a while.
Me: Why are u ordering me around? Im not a baby. I will go out if I want to.
Hd: It ll be a change for u and for Ashu.
Me: We don't need a change. We are fine.
Hd: Whats your problem? You dont even need to bundle up Ashu. Its very pleasant outside.
Me: But why should I go?
Hd: Why dont u go to that Migros store and buy the garbage disposal bags? It seems we have to use the ones that are sold in our area only.
Me: Why dont you go from office in the evening?
Hd: Fine.
Me: What if Ashu starts crying?
Hd: I said fine.
Me: What if she does nt want to sit in the stroller?
Hd: OK. Don't go.
Me: What if it starts raining?
Hd: OK. Sit at home all day long.
Me: OK. I ll go.
Hd: Whatever!

So after that silly conversation, I dressed up, got Ashu ready and ventured out. It took 20 minutes to walk to the store. 10 minutes there looking at all the aisles, bought the bags and apple juice for Ashu. I could nt have bought anything else even if I wanted to as I cant carry them back. While she was drinking the juice I pushed the stroller and walked back home. 20 more minutes. Ashu did nt utter a word. Not a whimper. Sometimes I was doubtful if she was even sitting on the stroller. She was unusually quiet. Observing every thing on the way. Im sure she was making some escape plans and memorizing the route! Or probably did nt want to cry and ruin the one chance she got to go out. Or may be she overheard the conversation I had with Hd! But it sure left me wonder why these kids behave the way they do when Dad, Grandpa or Grandma are anywhere near the radius. At least Ashu does. Shes an angel all day long but becomes this little devil once Hd comes home in the evening. And Hd is not even the extreme pampering kind like my dad. I am terrified of the future. It looks like she ll tell on me to Hd any day now. I better get my act together and mend my ways. And go out more. It was fun.

Is it the kid or the mom?

Ashu is by no means gentle all the time. But I know her enough to predict whats coming. Sometimes just by the way she walks to another child, I know if shes going to snatch the toy from that child or just touch the child or push her/him. Not always but most of the times. So I act accordingly. When we go to a park or some party, I'm always supervising her and seeing how shes behaving with the other children. One, it makes me understand my child and two, it also gives me time to stop her if shes going to behave badly. But some parents just let their children loose once they reach the park or the party. They have no idea how their kids are behaving towards other kids or generally what they are up to. And I mean kids between 2 to 4. Some parents just stand there and stare even if theirs kids are behaving badly. I am absolutely confused on why they are that way. To be honest, fathers are okay in these situations. They either apologize or remove the child from the scene. But the mothers are another story. They think its some kind of a battle and they ll lose it if they apologize or even acknowledge the situation. I know its tough to generalize the situations but take this case. A month back, when we had gone to the park with Ashu, there were these two boys aged 3 and 4. They both had a long wooden stick in their hands and were swishing it and hitting everyone who passed them. The mother was sitting on the park bench very near and watching. Ashu ran towards the boys and my mom and I got scared and ran behind her. We picked up Ashu just in time and my mom was hit by the boys in her back and she got really mad. The mother was sitting and watching. She made a feeble attempt to call the boys but did nt even get up from the bench. We hurriedly left the place and went to another corner. I watched the boys for some more time and they were still at it. The mother was sitting and watching. Another time when Ashu was 7 or 8 months old, she was sitting on her pram. A small boy came near her and tried to pull the toy that was hanging on the hood of the pram. He could nt and he tired to pull hard and Ashu started crying because of the jerks. I told the boy to stop but he would nt listen to me. His mother stood near him with a smile on her face. I pushed the pram and left the place. Don't you think these situations called for the mothers to act? I would have. And I expect the same from other mothers too. Whats the shame in accepting that our children behave badly sometimes and apologizing for the same?

ps.
This post was in my draft for a while unfinished. This post by Gauri inspired me to finish it.

St.Valentine and ABC.

Today morning after breakfast, Hd has some official work so he shut himself up in the bedroom with his laptop. Ashu started banging the door and shouting "Appa, Appa". So to distract her, I told her I ll show her ABC Zoo and started up my laptop to show her the ABC's from the fisher price website. She was sitting near me and when I opened the site, there was this Valentines day banner on it. Thats when I remembered! I called Hd loudly and he yelled back "WHAT" thinking that it was another diaper change time. I shouted "Happy Valentines day". He yelled back "Today? Wish you the same dear". And I went back to the ABC zoo while he went back to his work. I sent an ecard from my laptop from the living room which he received 2 seconds later in his laptop in the bedroom. Cool, huh? Happy Valentines Day Folks! Go on, spread the love. ;)

The Parakeet.

Ashu is talking a lot these days. Like a parakeet. She not only says it back after us but she remembers the words and speaks them on the right occasion too. It reminds me that I have to be very careful with my words. The other day in Ikea I got so excited at the children's section since this was the first time I can actually buy something instead of commenting "cute" and moving to the Kitchen area where I can buy stuff I don't need! So I got carried away and wanted to buy the whole section. Hd said its perhaps better if we move into Ikea as well! Ahhh, would nt that be lovely?? Anyway, in my cheerful mood I was picking up random things and asking "Idhu Nallaa irukaa? Adhu nalla irukaa?" (Is this good? Is that good?) to Hd. Ten minutes later we hear a squeaky voice "Appa! Appa! Nallarukka?" and shes holding a set of colorful little cloth hangers in her hands. Of course, I had to buy them too! :)

ps.
I so very badly wanted to move the ugly post down.

The Good, Bad and Ugly.

I don't know where to begin. So many things have happened in this one week since I landed in Zurich. Good, bad and ugly.

Good:
Lovely flat. Amazing surroundings. Very peaceful. Ashu is having fun exploring every corner of the house. Seeing so many new things. Her bright red small chair. Her cute junior cot. All her old favorite books she did nt see for the past 2 months. Noddy, Dora and Mickey Mouse talking in German on TV. Helping me in the common laundry room. Waving bye bye to her Dad from the balcony. Rushing outside and standing near the lift door when he comes back home. The trains every 10 mins whizzing past behind our apartment. The cold walks when she says "Kululadhu"(Its cold!)

Bad:
Ashu has had a cold right from the time we landed. And its not going. Her nose is running permanently. On Sunday, she had bad cough and could nt sleep the whole time. She was wheezing very badly and scared us to death. Hd and I were holding her the entire night. She seemed to be better in the day but we decided to go to a Doctor anyway. The paediatricians in this area were fully booked so we went to the emergency in the children's hospital. We waited for 4 hours to see a Doctor. The waiting room looked like a day care with so many kids, books, toys, etc... So Ashu had fun. She seemed to be perfectly OK when the Dr checked her. So all for nothing. It was a frustrating wait and we spent 6 hours for nothing. Thankfully Ashu did nt have the wheezing again but her nose would nt stop running. We have found a paediatrician a little away from our area and got an appointment tomorrow. Hope everything works out.

Ugly:
Yesterday we went to Ikea and bought a million things for the house. When we entered the apartment and were walking towards the lift, Ashu ran near the steps which goes down to the basement. I was afraid she ll fall down and ran behind her as the stairs are dangerously steep. She was on the second step and I bent down to lift her. I tripped and fell. It was a nasty fall. I landed with a thud hurting my chin on the landing. From the second step, past ten more steps, face first on the floor. No rolling. I was in a daze for 10 seconds, there was blood dripping from my face all over the floor, my teeth were broken and I could feel the broken pieces of teeth in my mouth. Hd was shocked to say the least. I picked up myself, held a hankie under my chin and took the lift to reach our flat. There was a deep gash under my chin because I had hit the corner of a step. Though there were broken teeth, there was no blood. I spat powdered teeth. Two teeth were loose. I kept some ice on the chin when Hd called for a taxi and we went to the emergency. It was 9pm by now and Ashu was sleeping in the waiting room with Hd while I got the check up, x rays and stitches under the chin and was asked to go to another hospital to see a dentist. We took a taxi and went there. It was 11.15 pm. The dentist checked and pulled the loose tooth and filled it temporarily. 3 more teeth were chipped and 1 tooth was hurting. (And I have an old chipped tooth and a cavity too if you must know!) She gave me some pain killer and asked me to see a dentist later to do the rest. We came home by 1 am. And that's when I called up my sister and then my parents and broke down. What if it was Ashu who was hurt, Why could nt I have been more careful, Why me, I was so stupid, Why me, Why now, Bad time, Bad luck, ...

Today I feel better. My teeth hurt and the stitches below the chin are itching. Im not able to move the lower jaw so I cant chew. Im on a lukewarm liquid diet. May be this is the only way I can be on a diet! Got to see a dentist soon and then a few days later, got to remove the stitches. Hope everything goes well from here. I cooked, cleaned and went about doing the daily chores much to Hds disapproval. Somehow Im extra active when Im hurt or sick. As if to prove that Im okay. I am okay.

ps.
Thanks all of you for the nice comments to my earlier post. I cant explain but I am so glad I have this blog and all of you.

Grüße from Zurich!

I cant be away too long from this blog especially when I have so many things to share. So after making Ashu sleep and generously letting Hd make dinner, here I am. Ashu waved bye bye to her precious grand parents and boarded the plane bravely in Bangalore. I on the other hand was crying. Before a stranger that too. Because he asked me to pay up for excess baggage. I could have sent the things by cargo for half the fine. Anyway, I paid up after a little bargaining. I hate Lufthansa! Probably, because of this heavy drama, the rest of the journey went smoothly. Ashu slept half the time in the flight. The rest of the time, she was looking at the small baby next to us and playing with her toys and books. When we landed in Frankfurt, she started asking for her dad and looked at me as if I had cheated her and brought her to some Dadforsaken place! One more hour of flying, baby! That went fine too. Rushed through immigration in Zurich and went to the baggage area. I could see Hd standing outside. I took Ashu in her stroller and put her near the glass wall and Hd was looking at her from the other side. Ashu was looking at all the people standing there and when her eyes went to Hd, her whole face lit up and she screamed "APPA"!! I ran and collected the baggage and went out. Ashu ran to her dad and he gave her a stuffed bear and bunch of tulips for me. The taxi driver helped me with the baggage and when we went out,... Well, well, well! What do you think? There was this white stretch Limousine and the driver was standing with the door open for me and Ashu! I just died and went to heaven straight in the Limo! I took some photos before of course! :) Hd has given me very many surprises before but I used to always guess or sort of get a hint on what he was upto. But this time, the whole thing was such a surprise that it was too much. I actually climbed into a Limo! The whole leather interior, the mini bar with Crystal glasses, the lightings, the music, everything was so beautiful! It was 30 mins drive from the airport to home and for the first time in our married life, I did nt ask Hd, "How much?" Because after 4 months of delay in getting the visa and the 12 hour flight, I knew I deserved such a welcome.

Ashu would nt let go of her dad even for a minute. She follows him everywhere like a puppy and stands guard at the bathroom door when hes using it. Last night she slept for 12 hours and then took a nap in the morning. So the jet lag is not that bad. Shes eating without a fuss because shes with her dad. I mean, you should see her face. She has this loyal look as if she would do anything for her dad. Im almost in tears whenever she calls Appa with a pain in her voice. Even though she never once asked for Dad or showed in any way that she missed him when we were in Bangalore, the pain in her voice now says it all. My poor little darling! The flat which is our home now is on the 10th floor and the views are amazing. Theres a farm on one side were there are cows and horses. The other side has a view of the city and the night view is awesome especially with a full moon like yesterday. Cant ask for more. Someone up there really likes me. Thank you pal and take care of the Lufthansa people for me, will ya?

YES!

At last! After what seems like an eternity, though "only" quarter of an year, the passport stamped with my precious Swiss visa arrived today. I did nt even have a minute to relish the moment or breathe a sigh of relief. A million things to do and my brain is cramped with a billion details. I remembered to cancel the phone and internet. So it will be gone tomorrow. I am leaving for Zurich the day after. My next post will be from Zurich, folks! Dont know when though. I ll be singing all the Bollywood and Kollywood hero-heroine reunion songs and if I get time in between them, will keep you posted! ;)

All I can think about is how the father-daughter reunion is going to be! :)

ps.
Wish me luck for a smooth flight. Im having nightmares thinking about it.

Tolet.

For the past 5 years, whenever we went abroad we never had the time to look for a tenant for our flat. There were lots of issues too. It will be partly furnished, one bedroom will be locked with our stuff, we ll never know when we ll be coming back, etc... But this time we made up our minds to let it out and Hd gave an ad in his office. This was in Oct. No one approached. I was happy that I don't have to clean the house and arrange things. Then my visa got delayed, so we forgot about the ad. But this sneaky hubby of mine re posted the ad 2 weeks back. An what do you know? I got 18 calls the first day and 5 visitors too! The first guy who came home liked the place and was ready to pay a token advance. I told him No problem, I ll confirm by evening. The second guy who came to see the flat is the reason for this post. He really really liked the flat and this would be a convenient location for him as well. But I told him that a person has already seen it and I have told him that he can take the place. But he would nt let it go. He started giving me a lengthy speech on why I should let my flat to him. I told him that I ve almost taken an advance from the prev guy and if that guy backs out, I ll consider him. But he started waving his wallet at me and asking how much was the token advance. I told him that my husband is still sleeping since its early morning for him in Swiss and will give him a call later. He left the house after 25 mins. And an hour later, Hd calls up and tells me that this guy has sent a long mail to Hd asking him to let the flat to him! I got really annoyed. Then I was taking more calls and telling people that the flat is not available any more. This annoying guy calls me thrice more to ask me if I have decided. I tell him that I cant say No to the first guy as I have no reason to. He tells me that Im the decision maker and I should choose him! Oh My God! Get a life, dude!

By evening, first guy comes home again and we seal the deal. 3 more people come to see the flat and go back disappointed. None stayed more then 5 mins, for your kind information! Then at 9 pm, I call the annoying guy and say that the first guy came home and we sealed the deal.( Because I told him I ll call him back and not to call me anymore in the evening.) Again, he gives a long lecture on why I should have chosen him. I say Im sorry but I had told the first guy that he was the first guy and I had no reason to refuse him. Again he reminds me that Im the decision maker and I could ve decided on himself. I tell him that I gave the first guy my word and I had to keep it. For this, my dear readers, he has the gall to tell me, "But no one is going to give you an award for that madam!" I said, “But it means a lot to me” and hung up. I am so glad that this fella did nt come home first. Some people!

ps.
And if you did nt know it already from this blog, I hate to say No and get really uncomfortable and all panicky in situations where I have to disappoint people! But hurting people I love, that I can do with a flourish!Yeah, thats me! ;)

????

Today is marked in history, as the questions have begun! Only after the incident, I realized the absence of it. Later in her life when Ashu is asked by someone, "So when did you start asking so many questions", she scan promptly say January 23rd, 2007 and she will be absolutely right! Thats right! My baby girl asked me a question today for the first time.

She has repeated Qs before, like when I say "This is a Doggy", she ll ask me "Doggy ya?" (Is this a Doggie?)
This is a Cat with Cat aa?
Thats a Moon with Moon aa?
This is an Apple with Apple aa?
This is your Daddy with Are you sure? Ok just kidding! But you get the point. Today madam climbs on the chair, then on to the dining table and picks up a water bottle and asks me "Juice aa Ma?" (Is this juice, my beloved mother?) And I said "No, thats water". And she asks "Water aa?" And I was like "Oh God! Did you just ask me an original question? Wow!" And she echos "Wow!" You can say that again, Princess! Wow indeed!

ps.
For those of you who expected some question like that cute boy asks in the KBC Ad, go watch commercials in the Pogo TV channel and stop reading silly mommy blogs.

Five point me!

There are a million things I have not written about myself in this blog or anywhere else for that matter. They are either very personal or very embarassing or involves someone else. Some stuff, I planned to write in my later posts. A little at a time, you see! Anyway, now I have to think about five of them and list them here thanks to our friendly Witch. Any reason to talk about oneself. Here I go...

1. I have the mother of all inferiority complex.
--> Oh! She writes so beautifully! I am nothing compared to her.

--> Oh God! She has taught her one year old the alphabets? I am a bad mother.

--> Wow! She has kept such a beautiful home! I am a horrible house keeper!.

2. I am L.A.Z.Y.
--> I dont step out of the house for days together.

--> I have NEVER cooked anything for myself. I eat toast for breakfast, sandwich for lunch and toasted sandwich for dinner when I am alone.

--> I call up the corner store and order bread to be home delivered.

3. I hate it when I know I am right and the other person is wrong but I cant do anything to prove it. I absolutely hate such situations. I come home and shout at HD, call my sister and complain and even write about it in my blog. I just cant let go. Logics like "You know you are right! Why do you want acceptance from near strangers?" dont make sense to me.
For the record,

--> Alex Haley won a PULITZER award for Roots. Not a Nobel prize for literature. If HD's Ex Boss's Wife is reading this, please be a bigger person and accept that you were wrong and I was right. FYI, this happened 5 years ago in Lake District, UK when we went on a trip together.

--> Big Five means Lion, elephant, Leopard, Rhino and... BUFFALO. Not Giraffe. Dont argue with a person who had spent a fortune on an African safari and had just returned. Especially to a friends friend. Especially when we are never going to meet again. It kills me!

--> Tiramisu has alcohol in it. Yes, even if YOU carefully selected the best from the store and served it for dessert. Even if it has nt got any, when a pregnant woman says she does nt want it, let it go.

4. One blog related thing about me. I take loads of time to write a post. Then I save it as a draft. Few hours or even few days later, I read it again and decide if I want to click publish or not. But I have only 2 posts in draft right now. I wrote them almost 8 months back. So chances are that they ll never see day light! Also, I take too much time for my own good to leave comments as well. Should I or should nt I? I hate myself! * Took me 2 weeks to click publish for this post. *

5. Ihadanimaginaryboyfriendwheniwas17andIledallmyclosefriendsbelievethathewasreal. Heevenwroteletterstomeandsentcards!

There! I am done.

ps.
If you have decoded the fifth point, keep it to yourself. And the comments too.

Bigger, better & older Boo.

I don't think Big Boo wants to remember this birthday. I mean I would nt want to too if I were that old! ;) But luckily, I ll always be younger than her. Oh, come on Sis. You are moping anyway. One mean post is nt going to hurt you any more!

But in case you were expecting something special, how about this? You have one more girl looking up to you now. Happy Birthday, Sis! You are loved by everyone but loved the most a lot (Happy now, Jeeju?!) by me. And our little girl.

பொங்கலோ பொங்கல்!

Here's to more comments.

It came to our attention at Boo's through a source that this week is National Delurking Week. We are not able to confirm the same though. Might be a rumour. But we like the general idea. So if you are a reader who does nt leave comments, its time we introduce you to someone. Lurker, meet Key Board! Move that hand from the Mouse for a teeny-weeny while and t.y.p.e. a comment. Thanks in advance.

Off I go to delurk. It would take me all night since I lurk around umpteen food blogs regularly though I have nt cooked in months. Tonnes of Mommy blogs that I tend to forget my own childs name sometimes. Dozens of crappy blogs I hate and can't keep away from. Loads of popular blogs where I am too shy to leave a comment. Come to think of it, I should probably link them all in my blog and leave it at that. On National linking day, perhaps! ;)

ps. If you did nt know it already, Im a sucker for comments. So people who do leave comments on my blog can join in the fun too! :)

Playing in the park.

Yesterday my father-in-law came to visit. As soon as he entered the door, Ashu ran up to him and showed her right hand and said "Uvva". She had a mosquito bite in one of her fingers. Such a diva, this one! In the evening we went to a park and Ashu had fun with her grandpa. There should be a ban on Balloon salesmen entering parks. All the children went crazy as soon as they heard that squeaking sound he does with the balloons. Ashu needs no pied piper, she followed the balloon-wala all through the park. The suckers that the grandpas are, FIL decided to buy a balloon for Ashu. I did nt want him to. Firstly, they were those HUGE pillar like 5 feet balloons. We cant even take it in the car back home. Secondly, all the other kids would feel bad and the parents would curse me! Just like that time when I was 20 and was traveling alone in a train and opened up a can of coke. The 3 year old boy sitting next to me started crying his lungs out and demanded a coke from his mother. What am I to do? I had only one can. The train was moving, so could nt buy another one even if I wanted to. I drank each sip with guilt and thats the last time I did something like that. Anyway, back to the park. But of course FIL did nt listen to me and bought Ashu the balloon. And guess what? Ashu would nt even take it, said nahnah and kept following the balloon-wala. HA! Now try to buy the balloon-wala Appa, I told my FIL. He would have if he was my father! (That story for a later post!) Thankfully, Ashu got distracted after a while and started playing with the balloon. For a few minutes. Then I had to carry that stupid balloon rest of the time. We went to a temple later and Ashu would nt leave the sannadhis. Each time, we had to drag her to the next. She was fascinated by the huge idols. Since they were hardly a few people in the temple, we had our hearts content looking at the Swami. The Alankaram(decoration) was awesome. (Whats the right word for "Lakshanam"?) FIL had to leave the same night. Ashu did nt like that one bit. And yes, the big balloon burst even before we came home.

As if I don't have enough pressure to potty train...

Lot of people seem to land in my blog while searching for "pampers imported diapers in india" in Google. The thing is for the past 3 months we are nt getting the imported Pampers diapers in Bangalore. Or in a few places in Chennai where I checked when I was there in November. Even Life Style in Bangalore stopped stocking. All the pharmacies which had loads of stock in October ran out in November. After visiting 10 shops and calling up lots of places, I gathered that theres some ban on imported Pampers and no one has stock. So I bought the locally made Huggies. It will be an understatement if I tell you that its bad. The quality is bad, the packing is bad, it does nt fit right, leaks all the time, bigger sizes are nt available and they are absolutely useless for overnight use. So I guarded the one pack of Pampers I had and used them only in the nights. Used Huggies or the locally made Pampers in the day. Then I was able to buy one more pack of Pampers 2 weeks back. Got hold of some Imported Huggies which are very good but I did nt get the correct size. Thankfully Ashu was ok with all these changes and did nt develop rashes like the last time she did when I used Huggies briefly.

Anyway, I think the reason for the unavailablity of Pampers is that they are promoting the locally made Pampers in a big way and since the price is almost the same, no sensible parent is going to buy the local pampers if the imported ones are available. And thats why the mysterious ban. My question to Pampers is "Then why the appalling quality?" Do we look stupid to you? Either sell the local Pampers dirt cheap and make the imported ones available too for people who can afford it. Or match the quality. Its time manufacturers understand that there is a new category of consumer mothers now who dont care about the money when it comes to providing good quality products for their children. Do you see me complaining about the non availablity of good quality panty liners in my blog? Or that I would really love to get some imported Always sanitary napkins? So for poop sake, please sell us the diapers we want.

Party Girl.

We went to a party today. My neighbors daughters first birthday party. I had not invited them for Ashus birthday though! Me bad! Since we were bored anyway, bought quite an expensive gift because of the guilt and went to the Venue. The invite said 6.30 and we were there at 6.45 pm. The hosts came 5 minutes after us! Ashu had loads of fun running around the hall decorated with balloons. Then the guests started arriving and there were lots of kids so Ashu mingled! My mom and I were getting really hungry and impatient as we thought we can be home at least by 8.30 pm, the time Ashu goes to sleep usually. But the cake was cut only at 8.15 and dinner was served at 8.30. My mom and I took turns and ate and then another neighbor of mine said she ll give us a lift home. But there was an unexpected delay - Ashu would nt leave. She did nt want to come home. She said NO when I asked her to come with me. This was new. She stood on the stage and was picking those colorful thermocol balls from the floor and arranging them on a table with another little girl. I gave her a few minutes but madam was nt budging. I pleaded her(I beg you Ashu!), demander her(Ashu! NOW!), bribed her(I ll read you the ABC book how many ever times you want after we go home!), lied to her(We ll go home, drink milk and come back here.) but nothing worked. So I picked her up and walked out. She was crying the whole time. Then while we were standing on the sidewalk waiting for the car, she climbed the stairs and went back inside the hotel and was trying to open the door of the party hall. I picked her up again, sang some songs to soothe her and bundled her inside the car. Thankfully she was alright in a few minutes as there was another little girl with us in the car. But she had a long face when we entered home. She drank her milk and went to sleep even before I finished saying Good night. May be it was the sleep + hunger which made her cranky. I don't know. While changing her diaper, I told her I ll take her to a party everyday or throw one for her everyday if I can help it. She gave me a look. I don't know what it meant. I sure wish I can give her everything she wants but there will always be occasions when I will make her unhappy. I just hope there are nt too many of them. For this reason, I wish she grows up fast. At least to understand that when we leave some place, it is to go home. However boring it is, its still our home.

Sappy me!

Whenever HD is away from me, I discover some new song and repeat it to death. Much to my Mom's annoyance. I don't know if the songs are more touching because I miss HD or the other way around. 5 1/2 years back it was Vaseegara from Minnale. We were in our first year of marriage and it was our first separation. Understandable. After hearing the song around 300 times a week, I quit my job and joined HD in London. Then 3 years back when HD left for Swiss, I had my German lessons left for another month. So stayed in Bangalore alone most of the time. It was Uyirin Uyirae from Kaakha Kaakha this time. And sometimes Kalaaba Kaadhalaa too from the same movie. But Uyirin Uyirae had the pain(!) I identified with. And this time, though this is the longest separation yet, I did nt really miss him as much as I did the previous times. Because of Ashu. I just did nt have the time. That is until I heard this song. Urugudhae from Veyil. Oh. My. God. What lyrics! What singing! From this moment, Shankar Mahadevan is going to be my most favorite singer. Without a doubt. He has been my favorite for a few years now but I used to waver when I heard some fantastic singing by Hariharan, Kaykay, Sonu Nigam, etc... But not any more. Just Wow!

I miss you, R. I cant wait to hear this song with you. Holding hands together, closing our eyes and lying on the bed and wishing that special moment never ended. Just promise me you won't fall asleep in the middle of the song like you did last time! And we both know how that moment ended, dont we?! ;)

ps. I have the lyrics of the song here in my Tamil Blog.