Bloggers block. Bear with me.

In no particular order,


Diwali went well. We celebrated in Legoland, Germany. They had special fireworks to begin the Halloween season. The universe does conspire, does nt it?

Antu came back from India with Hd and gave me a cold shoulder. Was more excited to see Ashu than me. Whatever! I dont care. I dont.

Did a Diwali do for Ashus class today. Im a natural after all! whowouldathunk it? I had butterflies in my stomach today morning before I went to school like before an exam. But I aced it. The kids had a blast. Ashu was so proud and went around "my mommy, my daddy, my baby" to all her classmates. It was so cute.

Antu is in a stage where I want to bottle her up and gift it to everyone. Sigh! And then they turn four!

Winter is here. I ve decided to make the most of it. Im not going to whine. Im not, Im not.

I joined this gym a month back. It has a beautiful baby care and Antu ,though cries a little bit when I leave her, is fine staying there for an hour. It has been 2 weeks since I went for one reason or the other. Wondering if Antu will be ok when I start to go again. We are older and wiser now, you know?

Ashu is happy now that she can wear tights, cardigans, jackets, mittens, scarves and caps. Weird, this one.

The other day a friend asked Antu, "are you eating a banana" and she said "yeah"! Instant reply. It was so cute. I think this was the first time shes answered a Q on her own.

My mom might visit in November. Ashu is on could nine. Im sure Antu would be too if she understood the concept of future. Me? Im dreaming about the dinners and movies out with Hd. I am a simple girl, that way!

Ashu is at her silliest. Now I know why kids push each other a lot. Hell, I want to just push her, out of a window sometimes, when she just would nt see logic and want something absolutely impossible. Like what, you ask? The same pink cup her friend is drinking milk from. Wanting a friend to stay back after quarrelling with him the entire duration of the play date. The "I am right" attitude even when she spells Sofia as Sofea and I correct her. Only because she asked me if the spelling was right, ok? Otherwise why would I make the stupid mistake of saying Her Highness is wrong?

A word Antu picked up on her own without any one of us teaching her - Dora. Do I even have to explain this?

Got back in to mailing with some dear old college friends of mine and God it feels so good. Just to think about the college days. sigh! But then that means - no Hd or kids, right? Hey wait a minute! What am I complaining about? ;)

The other day Antu was looking at Ashu with so much adoration. I told Ashu, "Antu loves you, Ashu. She thinks you are the best in the whole world"! So Ashu tells Antu, "No Antu. Amma and Appa are the best in the whole world"! Kids do know how to play us, dont they?

Are nt conversations like this supposed to happen when she is in her teens?

Amma, I don't like you.
Its OK. You don't ve to like me.
I am not going to talk to you forever.
That's OK too.
You are not my friend anymore Amma.
OK.
Amma..
(interrupting) I don't want to hear one more word from you.
But...
I said ...
Can I say one thing, Amma?
WHAT?
I don't like you.
Fine.
Fine.

Antus sudden vacation.

You would never guess but Antu is in India. Hd had this official trip coming and he was to leave on Monday. On Sunday morning I ask him, "Why dont you take Antu with you? She does nt need a ticket. And conveniently my mom is in Bangalore visiting her family. So you can leave her there." Much to my surprise, Hd said yes. I spoke to my mom and she was thrilled. I was also feeling not too well and the thought of managing both the kids for one whole week while Im sick did nt seem like a good idea. So after a little hesitation, I asked him to call the airlines.

Ashu went to school on Monday morning protesting. "I want to go to India too amma. I want to see Paati Thatha too. Thatha told me that I can come there whenever I want." I told her we both can have lots of fun here and sent her to school. Dad and daughter left in the afternoon. The flight was ok, Hd said. Only a dozen people asked Hd, "you are traveling alone with the baby?" and helped him carry antu, carry the bags,.. Even a co passenger helped Hd to make Antu sleep, it seems! Not fair, I tell you! People actually shoved me and went when I traveled alone with TWO kids! So not fair!

My dad reached Bangalore the next day and Antu is having fun at my grandmas place. Poor thing is too young to know whats happening. I knew my mom could handle it. I could nt predict how Antu will be since shes a little clingy to me. Ashu had spent loads of time with my folks when she was a baby. Antu - comparitively less. My heart did break that Im sending her away from me. I ve not spent a day or night away from Ashu yet.(except during the hospital stay when Antu was born) She has never gone even to a town away. But now at 15 months, Antu is thousands of miles away from home. Its a strange feeling. I dropped Ashu at school today morning and came back to the silent house. I feel so alone. Not a good feeling. Whatever I did with my life pre kids? What did Ashu and I do before Antu? Sigh!

The duo will be back on Sunday. 4 more days. I ve all the time to do some shopping peacefully. But do I want to? Nah! Kids! They just screw our lives like nothing else does. Come back already, Antu. We miss you! Even though Ashu says she does nt, shes only jealous. And Hd! What were you thinking? As if you needed more brownie points!

Bringing up Vasu.

Dear Parul,

During my recent India trip, we were in Landmark. Sis, Bil, Hd and I. As usual, I was in the children's books section and wondering if it ll be easier to just shift to the book store rather than lunging the books back to Zurich. In the two minutes I had to browse through the adult section, I picked up Bringing Up Vasu. Even though I had planned to buy the book and had seen how the cover looks like in your blog, it was a total shock to see the book in the shelf. I mean, books. There were more than one copy. Dozens, actually! If I was thrilled so much seeing that, I could totally imagine how you would ve felt. I picked up the book and grinned from ear to ear and showed the book to the trio. "Oooh! Nice cover", said Sis. "So this is the book you went on and on and pretended you were nt jealous about, huh?", asked Hd. (Liar!) The clueless Bil gave a blank stare and I readily explained to him. "My best friend wrote this book. I have nt met her, of course. Shes a blog friend but nevertheless this is the first book that someone I know has written. Cool, no?" (shhh Parul. Bil does nt read blogs. We are best friends, ok? ok.)

And yesterday, I finished the book. I could nt go and read your blog posts or leave comments while I was reading your book. The one time I tried, I wanted to leave a comment asking if Vasu got into Teddy Footprints or not! And did you actually meet a film star couple in Goa? The exact blog posts came to my mind when I read the similar chapters. Guess, Im your true blue blog stalker, after all! And it did nt help that I was on a train when I read Chapter 19. Baby Boo in Public? I was laughing out loud thanking my stars that I did nt name my blog - Baby Boos talk!

What Im trying to say is, I cant review the book objectively. I could nt even read it without picturing you as Mira. But that only makes me go in awe of you to have written a novel. The way you ve interwoven fictional stuff with your actual life and come up with this great read is amazing. I think with unknown authors, we dont know how much of the book is their personal experience and how much is purely fictional. So we can choose to empathize or not and judge the book without any qualms. Not that I know whats what with everything about your book, but I have developed a general idea. Its a book written by a friend (best friend if by a remote chance my Bil is reading!) and Im not able look past it. Now you ve gained a fan as well, Parul. A loyal one, at that! Thanks for the wonderful read. Wishing you all things wonderfull!

Luv,
Baby Boo :))

The Karmic connection between Saakku Pai and Ballet.

When I was in college, post grad, I used to take a bus or my bike(kinetic) to get there. Some days, my dad used to drop me in his car if he had some work in that area. So this one day, I was getting ready and he offered a ride. I accepted and we walked to the car. The scene that met me was unbelievable. You cant guess even if I give you a million years. Imagine! A 20 year old getting dropped by her dad to college. A car whose entire back is loaded with saakku pai (jute bags) filled with some stuff. My dads boss is sitting in the passenger seat. The office security guy in full uniform ,with a huge moustache to boot, is sitting in the back holding the saakku pais in place so that I ve room to sit at the back!!! I double backed and told my dad that I ll take my bike after all, I ve to go to a friends house after class. He gave me a look and said, "vandeela eru"! (Get in!) Not wanting to create a scene before his boss, I did,while cursing him under my breath. I mean, is he a Moron? Which self respecting girl will sit amidst saaku pai and get dropped in college? We made some small talk with the boss and neared my college.

As soon as the side gate of my college came to view, I screamed ,"Stop here, Appa. I ll go through this gate". But fate was nt on my side that day. "No no. You ve to walk a long way if you go via this gate. Let me take you to the main gate. Saar wants to see your college campus too", said the man! Why, God, why? What did I ever do to you? Was this because I made fun of Shanthi when she came to school one day with a shaved head when we were four? Or because I pulled Chitras legs since she and her 3 siblings came in a Maatu vandi(bullock cart) to school? Or was it because I sniggered at Gundamma Ratnamala who brought this huge tiffin carrier(It was anju adukku, for Gods sake!) for lunch? It had to be Karma coming to bite my behind!

So dad pulls inside the main gate. Oh yes, my secret crush is standing right near his bike talking to some friends. He had to be there, right? And some of my classmates too. Oh, goody! "Stop here, Appa", I say again trying hard not to yell. But no. the man does nt get a hint even if the said hint is dancing butt naked in front of his eyes with a huge neon sign! He stops the car at last, right in the middle of the parking area. All eyes are in the car. I try to open the door and wriggle out. But the security guy is faster and wanting to prove hes worthy of the pay check, gets down first and with his side of the door left wide open, comes running to my side and opens the door for me. As if the Maruthi 800 stuffed with saaku pai was nt enough, the security guy opens the door for me as well! If ever there was a time I prayed Mother Earth to swallow me whole, that was it! I just gave my best dirty look to my father and muttered, "You could nt have stopped at the side gate, could you?" and walked inside with my head bent. Nothing dreadful happened actually in college. At least nothing that lasted more than a couple of days. I could always count on Sharmila and her current new boy friend to take over any other news! But I remember the feeling of humiliation. Till this day. May be I over reacted, may be I was just shallow, may be I was just silly, but the embarrassment was true.

I relived this incident last week. But from this side of the fence. It happened when Ashu told me, "You dont have to come to school to help me get ready for the ballet class, Amma. I can do it myself." And if this simple statement can hurt me so much when in fact she said that because she believes shes a big girl now and can dress up herself, how much more will it hurt me when she starts getting embarrassed by me? Sigh! Refer to my Karma statement on Paragraph 2. Circle of life, my dears, Circle of life. Its vicious.

I only get jealous when I see such talents.

Ever since I heard this little boy sing this song,



Im hooked to this original song.



Why do I always, always discover songs late?

Needless to say, the song(both the versions) has been in non stop loop at Boo's! :)

ps.
ha! see the time stamp of this post? Cheap thrill. ;)

One of the reasons I love living where I live.

When I looked out of the kitchen window last week.

Get Well Soon.

First it was my sis breaking her ankle when she visited me here in April. Soon after, my mom broke both her feet.

Then I heard about people with fractures left, right and center when I was in India.

I come back and catch up with all the blogs and what do you know?

Sundar has an nightmarish accident and fractured his arm apart from other injuries.

Dipali fell down and broke her arm.

Tharini slipped and fell and fractured her feet.

Sur had a fall but thankfully she did nt break anything. (although reading about your fall gave me shudders thinking about my own a couple of years back)

This is to say, Get well soon and heal fast, people. And those who know me, just be damn careful and watch your step!

Update on this and that.

So much is happening here that I dont know where to begin.

Ashu started Pre K and is loving it. I still cant believe shes going full day.

She said she did nt want to go to school on the 4th day but she was ok a little later and skipped to school the rest of the week.

Fil left. Its pathetic to see Antu on her own. She was like an extra limb to my fil for the past 10 days.

I can at last see the sign of two teeth which are about to sprout in Antus mouth. About time.

Im sad at the same time because theres nothing like a gummy smile to melt your heart.

Im sure now that Antu came into this world just to show me how easy I had it with Ashu when she was a baby.

Unlike her sister, Antu does nt want anything to do with Milk. Give her solids anyday. Thankfully, she gobbles up yogurt and cheese. And I mix milk in her food. So we are doing ok, I guess. But Im still baffled that how a milk guzzler like me and Ashu ended up with an Antu.

Antu is already down to only one nap a day. I guess second ones are born with their own agendas. We are just obstacles on their way.

After 2 months in India cosleeping with Antu, Im now trying to sleep train her again. She howled and brought the roof down last night when I tried to leave her alone in her crib. But she was fine with me just patting her. So theres hope. I ll update in a couple of weeks if Im still alive.

Ashu on the other hand is so tired by the end of the day that she sleeps in her bed before her head hits the pillow. But on the days she is nt very sleepy, she complains that shes scared that a wolf will break her window and come in and bite her! So she lies down on the sofa in the hall and goes to sleep. Whatever!

I ve finally given up on Ashu with respect to her eating habits. She brings back most of her lunch back from school and makes a big drama of finishing it at home. So basically she has breakfast, then the lunch box she carries with pasta or sandwich is her lunch, evening snack and dinner. Whatever!

To balance out, Antu loves to eat all veggies and fruits. Finally I get to see how it feels when a child shows interest in her food and asks for more. Thank you, Lord Subramania!


Ashu still has to be taken once and sometimes twice to the bathroom during the nights. Some nights, she gets up and asks us to take her to the loo. Some nights, she does nt. Hd is this close to buying pull ups again for her. But I think its not fair for a 4 year old. He thinks its not fair that he has to get up in the middle of the night. Well, thats life Mr. Sperm Donor!

And oh, the girls have started that sister thing I was dreading. When Ashus school friend came home, she would nt let Antu enter her room because G is her friend and they are playing. And Ashu shut the door on Antu! Sigh!

I can safely say Good Bye to that Mother Teresa Award.

The unthinkable happened today. So I drop Ashu at school, then go to do groceries with Fil and Antu. I finish shopping and come back to the car park, load the groceries in the car, take Antu from the trolley, strap her in the car seat and while Fil stands near the car, I go to keep the trolley back and to pay for the parking. I come back to find that the car is locked and Fil looking at me quizzically. Thats when I remember that I gave the care key to Antu when she was in the trolley. Oops! So little Miss is locked inside with the car key and Fil and I are locked out! The little monkey! (Of course its all Antus fault!) I swore a couple of times, Fil was completely stunned and did nt know what to do and asked me if I ve a spare car key in my handbag! Yeah right! I looked through the window to see if I can see the car key in Antus hands and may be she ll press it again and unlock the car? No such luck. So I ask for help from a guy who parked his car next to us. Is it possible to open the car, I ask him? He says he does nt have the tools and asks me where the key is! I again look at Antu munching on a bread and being quite happy with the situation. I can ask Fil to stand guard while I take a cab, go home and get the spare key but it will take at least 30 mins for me and I was nt even sure the spare key was at home. Hd usually carries it with him and today hes not even in town! And what will Antu do inside a locked car for 30 mins? At least she was safe strapped in the car seat, I tell myself.

Then I tell Fil that I ll go ask help from the store people and walk towards the elevator. I pass the line of trolleys on the way and something tells me to look inside the last cart. And whaddayaknow? The car key is there!! Can you believe this? I let out a silent scream, grabbed the car key and ran towards the car. Fil was so relieved. So Antu had dropped the key in the cart and when I went to put back the trolley, the key got struck in the part where the kids sit and when it got folded, it had pressed the car key and the car got locked. Can anything be more weirder than this? I sent a silent prayer upwards and drove home thanking my lucky stars. Thorough out this very long 5 minutes ordeal, I had only one thought in my mind. A single thought that tormented me. The only thought which saw me through. "Why? Why? Why? Why did this have to happen in front of the FIL?" Sigh! Now the whole Madras and its Athimber will know. Next time you hear from someone about the loony mom who locked her baby inside the car, yes its me!

Why can't a woman be more like a man?

At times, I do wonder about the drama that our lives seem to be. It sure makes life interesting but a little complicated too. Take this for instance. How do I want my husband to behave when
a) my parents visit
b) my in laws visit
c) fil visits without the mil

c is our current scenario and even Hd who is a pro by now seems to be struggling even though it has nt been 24 hours since the Fil arrived. Sigh! I don't want to be in the husbands shoes, that Im sure of. Anyway, where was I? Yes, the husbands behaviour. When my parents visit, he should help as much as possible. No boundaries. Should never argue with me. Should take my side always. Simple. When in laws visit, he should help but not too much. We don't want the Mil to think that we are overworking her precious son, do we? But at the same time, he should nt watch TV while Im cooking. We want to show the Mil that we ve achieved what she could nt with her husband. So doing the laundry, yes yes yes. Cutting veggies - no no no. Surfing the net pretending to work while Im cooking - yes yes yes. Watching Tv - no no no. Asking if we can do a takeaway for dinner - yes yes yes. Volunteering to make upma - no no no. And on and on... you get the picture? When my mom comes, she completely takes over the kitchen so not much strategies needed there. We can make rules as we go. And a stern look at the husband does wonders to straighten any situation as you might know.

But with the in laws, the situation is a little more tricky. You have to make them believe that your husband does what you say WITHOUT you saying it and that he is ALSO happy doing it. Hah! And all this for what? God forbid if you think that she thinks that your husband is tied to your Saree end. That that is the truth is not the point, ok? She does nt need proof - that's the point. And now that Fil has arrived without the potential candidate, all bets are off. Unlike my mil whose eyes rarely miss anything, Fil is oblivious to who cooked his lunch and does nt care if the yogurt is store bought or home made. So today morning when I asked the working-from-home-Hd to change Antus diaper, he was a bit shocked. Are you sure, he asked! (which means "what about the Mother Teresa award you think you are going to get from my folks which I know is never going to happen but still you make my life hell by trying?") I'm sorry, my man. Your loss that your mom is nt visiting but this is my ideal situation to be in! While you are changing the diaper, give her a bath as well. :D

Ah, the web we weave.

Feed. Clean.

This is Ashus old but cool Tee. (Does anyone remember Ashus photo in it?) Antu wore it yesterday and I asked Ashu to read it. She did.
Feeb and Kleeaan, Amma.
Thats Feed and Clean, Ashu. Why do you think the arrows are for?
Why, Amma?
Where do I feed Antu?
In her mouth, so up arrow.
And then?
And then you clean the floor because there are crumbs down, so down arrow!!


Kids do have a clean mind, huh? ;)

With a heavy heart.

Last day at my parents'. Off to Madras tomorrow and then to Zurich on Tuesday. I don't know if Im relieved or sad. I told Ashu the other day, "Look Ashu, you should nt cry at the airport like last time. This time Appa is not here and Im alone with you and Antu. So you ve to cooperate ok?" My dad interrupted and said, "No,no.Sshes a good girl. She wont cry. Will you, Ashu?" "Yes thatha, I will cry", replied Ashu. Sigh! Was packing like crazy today. Seems as if I ve already developed roots here. The kids toys and books are all over the house. Our clothes are neatly stacked in the cupboard and I dont feel like packing them off and see an empty shelf. I dont know how my folks are going to bear it when they come back here from Madras to an empty house. Especially Antus soft babble and Ashus ear piercing "thaaaathaaaaa".

(Oh by the way, my knight in shining armor (Hd for the uninitiated!) is on his way to Madras fom ZRH right now. He ll reach tomorrow and then accompany us back on Tuesday. A sudden decision he took yesterday. I begged him not to and to please give me the ticket money in cash instead. The man would nt relent. But its such a relief. Suddenly I feel less burdened. As if someone took a load off my chest. Thanks, hon.)

In the evening, I was sitting on the terrace looking at the sky. Every evening, a flock of bight green parrots keep flying from one tree to another. Some 20 of them, either in small flocks or in one big flock. I can hear their loud "kee, kee, kee" a whole minute before spotting them. One cant see their color if we look at them against the blue sky. But when they all turn in unison against the backdrop of the huge neem tree, the gorgeous green color is sure to take ones breath away. It takes mine away every time. I dont think it can ever get boring. I have never been as blissful as I am at that moment. The going and sitting in the terrace waiting for the birds, then to hear their voice, then to see the flock and wait with bated breath just to get the glimpse of the green, the smile it brings to your lips, then just like that, the birds disappear. You dont know if you are happy or sad. But you are hopeful. That there will be a tomorrow. Somehow, all this makes me understand how my parents feel. For their grand kids. Sorry, Ma&Pa.

On that note (a la Tharini ;), wipe your tears and get ready for Ashus latest fad for silly jokes. Heres a sample.
Why did Tigger look into the toilet?

(scroll down)

He was looking for Pooh!

ROTFLOL!

Mottai Returns.

Please read this post for the details and see the photo below. The same happened word for word on July 25th. Half the way through the mottai, Ashu declared "I dont like this, Amma. Im upset" and held my sisters hand and left the scene.

ps.

If anyone is on their way to Vaitheeswaran Kovil for a mottai, Sankara Madam is a good and clean choice to stay for a couple of hours. For Rs.25 per person, you can use the hall, bring the Barber there and get the mottai done in the front yard, use the bathroom at the back to bathe the baby and the baby sitter(!). For an additional Rs.50, you can also get a room if its not occupied. And its a stones throw from the Kovil. (near the entrance to the kulam) For Ashu, we went to the public Mandapam especially for mottais and it was very unclean.

Antus Ayush Homam.

Alls well at Booville. Antus Ayush Homam/star birthday went well. She sports cute ear rings now. (Ashus first ear rings!) She looks completely changed. She will be a Mottai kutti(shaved head) in a couple of days too, poor child!

Hd and Bil have left. So its just me, sis, Ashu and Antu at my parents place and needless to say, us girls are driving my dad crazy! Poor man has nt missed his Maapillais this much ever!

More updates once I safely reach Zurich which is in another 2 weeks.

What are we up to?

Antus birthday was a small affair. I bought loads of gifts for her. One of those press-button-make-noise toy from her dad and me, a noddy doll from Ashu, a wooden puzzle from her paternal grand parents, a set of 4 peter rabbit board books from sis and Bil and a silk paavadai from my folks. I bought blocks for Ashu as well for being a good big sister. Ashu said, "but sometimes Im a bad sister, amma. I hurt Antu". I told her its OK while rolling my eyes! Sometimes, indeed! Then the whole jingbang went to the Guindy park. I took Antu in the stroller and sat under a shade while the 2 set of grand parents took Ashu around. Then we went to Savera(Malgudi) for lunch. At the end, they brought a cake for Antu and we sang and clapped and ate the cake. Hd joined us on the phone. I told my mom how everyone was there for Ashus 1st birthday and the big party and how Antus birthday was such a low profile one. But I added, "instead of an Appa, she has an Akka present now. That covers everything, I guess." My mom took 5 whole minutes to understand who the said akka(big sis) is!

Then we left Madras the next day and drove down to my parents place. As always, Im hogging on mangoes, watching TV ("ulaga tholaikaatchicyil mudhal muraiyaaga..."), stepping out of the house only if Im dragged out and seeing Ashu only during meal times. Shes busy with her regular gang here who are at least a decade older than her! Antu is still only crawling and at the end of the day, the pants she wore for the day goes straight to the pile of clothes my mom keeps for mopping the floor! I bought her 2 pair of pants yesterday and both are in the pile now. Poor pants! My dad borrowed a inflatable water tub from a friend and both the girls have a ball in it for an hour everyday. Antu is getting used to going to sleep on my moms shoulder on the Oonjal.(swing) I think shes going to spit in the direction of her crib when we go back to Zurich next month! I dont have to worry about Ashu though. I don't think shes coming back at all.

Yet another test to get into Mommy Heaven.

The plan was to travel from Zurich to Chennai together. With Hd. But as always, work came up and Hd asked me to postpone. But me being me, asked aloud "whats the worst that can happen" and decided to travel alone with 2 kids. I knew Ashu would nt be a problem as long as shes not told to walk while shes sleepy. Antu would be ok too since I have sure shot way to shut her mouth, by breast feeding! Kodis Mom, who I think is being my guardian angel without actually knowing it herself, posted recently about her trip alone with the kids and that gave me more confidence. I prepared Ashu for weeks that she was muttering, "I ll cooperate, Amma" even in her sleep. I tried making Antu walk but no luck there. She had her mind set only on crawling. May be she ll change her mind once she saw the airplane bathroom, I told myself. So on 20th afternoon, Hd left us in the airport, shook his head one last time at my foolishness and walked away. This is it, I told myself. The ultimate test!

I carried only a backpack with the bare minimum requirements. Ashu carried a tiny backpack and also a small children's pullman suitcase. It carried a set of clothes, toys, books and snacks for her. It was very light and I could carry it if it was too much for her. But the poor darling, pulled it by herself everywhere. So it sure was a good buy. Emirates has a good in flight entertainment so from Zurich to Dubai, she watched Mickey Mouse Wonder house and Little Einsteins back to back, sipped juice, nibbled on the flight food and had a good time. Antu slept off during take off and slept for two hours in the bassinet leaving me to eat in peace and also visit the bathroom. Then I fed her some baby food, read to her, sang to her, changed her and kept her busy. When a kind gentleman smiled at her, I narrowed down the victim and plonked Antu on his lap and used the bathroom and came out in a record time of 5 1/2 seconds, thanked him and picked Antu and walked back to our seat before the man could realize what had happened! Ashu nodded off just before we landed in Dubai. Trouble, I told myself!

Ashu cried when I woke her up and asked her to walk. But she was ok within a few minutes. I found the complimentary strollers at the Dubai airport for Antu and after that, it was an easy ride. We window shopped a bit, had hot chocolate and I fed and changed Antu and it was already time to board the Chennai flight. We did nt get the first row seats with bassinets for this leg. But it was no so bad. Ashu slept the whole time. Antu was a little fidgety but otherwise ok. One thing I should ve done was to take Ashu to the bathroom and used it myself just before we landed. But there was no time and on hindsight, that was a big mistake. We landed in Chennai and I felt invincible and patted myself at my back not knowing what was in store for me!

I had filled all our immigration forms in the plane. When we walked out of the plane, there was a long line for the swine flu test. Since there are no complimentary strollers like in Dubai airport and we dont get our own strollers at the gate anymore, I had to carry Antu all the time and my hands almost died on me and fell off. Ashu seemed to decide enough was enough and refused to do anything I said. And then the swine flu testing person asks me to fill 3 more forms with all our details. What am I supposed to do with Antu? Leave her on the tobacco spat, stained floor and fill the forms? Yes, ladies and gentlemen, thats exactly what I had to do. The lady just felt Antus head for temperature, asked us if anyone has fever or cough and sent us off. When she tried to touch Ashus head, she wriggled and ran away! Then we stood in the immigration line for a long time. Just before it was our turn, Ashu started bawling and said she wanted to use the bathroom otherwise she ll just "go there"! I thought about it for 2 seconds, then took her to the bathroom which was way past behind the swine flu lines. Ashu took one look at the bathroom and refused to go in. Then she did nt know how to use the Indian style toilets, I did nt know what to do with the small suitcase or Antu. Thought its ok to lose the suitcase than Antu and took Antu inside leaving the suitcase outside. Ashu created all sort of mess you dont want to know about and after almost slipping and dropping Antu in the toilet, we came out unhurt but not the most hygienic!

Then we came back to the immigration line and when I requested a person in the front if I can go before him since I was standing in the line before, the man REFUSED! I thanked him and tried the handicapped and diplomat line. Since there were many wheelchair bound people before me, it took almost 30 mins for our turn. Antu cried 29 mins of it and both my hands were completely dead and I would nt even have realized if they had fallen off! Ashu was the most cranky by this time and when we reached the hand baggage screening area, she refused to part with her backpack. The kind man at the security took one look at me and waved us off. I crossed the exit to go to the baggage claims where my father and father in law waved at us. I glared at them and if I had a third eye, they both would ve been burnt to ashes in 2 seconds. As luck would have it, I got my stroller and the two checked in suitcases after 40 minutes. By this time, I was beyond caring and left Antu on the floor where she was crawling and almost getting trampled by people and their trolleys. Ashu was a little recharged after seeing a glimpse of her Thathas and looked out for our suitcases which showed up at last. The porter helped me with the baggage and after what seemed an eternity, we walked out. I plonked Antu to the first pair of hands that reached towards me. Thankfully, it was my fathers.

Verdict: Doable journey with a nightmarish end.

27.06.2009

Dear Antu,

I was really wondering if I can just leave this link to the letter I wrote to Ashu on her first birthday and ask you to replace Ashu with Antu. I was hoping you would nt mind hand me down letters since you dont seem to mind the clothes! Then I totally forgot about you birthday because of the India trip and your Ayush homam planning. Then today when I was sitting on the Dentist chair with my mouth wide open and a tooth being drilled, I felt that I would rather take labor than dental work and told myself that I should be hit with a shoe if I go near a chocolate again. And that's when I remembered! Oh God! Almost a year gone by since my labor! Its you birthday in less than 2 days and I had no plans, no letters in draft. But you are very happy amidst the two set of doting grand parents, in Madras during the peak summer, playing in the beach, happily staying with one of the grand parents while your mother goes shopping. And my eyes truly welled up at the moment. Damn the painful dental procedures!

Sweetie pie, I love you. Happy Birthday! I thought Ashu was the perfect baby until you came along. Prove me wrong in the coming years too if you want me to live long and write birthday letters to my grand kids!

Love,
Amma.

ps.
Long back, my mom told me that my dad came to see me only after 22 days after I was born. May be she did nt realize what a potent weapon she was giving me by telling me that bit of information because I have used that line to blackmail my dad on every occasion and I still do. And I cant deny your weapon, Antu. Your dad is nt here for you first birthday. Go get him. ;)

End of a Pre Schoolers Era.

Today was Ashus last day of Pre School. Went in the afternoon, collected her port folio and all the other stuff, said thank you and byes by dozens to the teachers, Moms and kids and came back home with a heavy heart.

I cannot believe that from August,

Ashu wont be among the youngest in her school.

that shes going to attend full day.

that shes going to go on field trips.

that her class is upstairs.

And what the hell am I going to do with all that extra time? *shudder*

Last night, Ashu and I sat and made Thank you cards for the teachers and Ashu drew something and wrote "Love, Ashu" by herself in all the cards. But today she refused to say thank you and bye to her teachers when we were leaving. And one of the teachers said, "Thats ok. Ashu has her own special way of saying Thanks. Thats what makes her Ashu. She would nt be Ashu otherwise." I grinned while I was seething inside. But when I think about it now, she does make sense. THAT I HAVE A STUBBORN BRAT FOR A KID! Special, my foot!

I thought I would never say this. But grow up, Ashu. You have to become a precocious pre kindergartener pretty soon.

One cant fight genes much, I guess.

Remember the quote in Friends when Rachel says, "Oh my God. I've become my father. I've been trying so hard not to become my mother, I didn't see this coming”? Its almost the same case for me. I was trying so hard not to become like my dad that I have become a deadly combo of both my mom and dad. Yesterday for the first time I called Ashu as Antu and she gave me a stern warning. "I'm not Antu, Amma. Don't call me Antu." Oh, man! Why am I having a Deja Vu?

Other things I say which I ve invountarily borrowed from my mom -

~ "I have only two hands. Cant you see?"

~ "I'm a human being, not a machine".(Funny when you say it in Tamil, manushi and machine rhyme!)

~ "If you can't help, at least don't trouble me". (ubayogamaa illennaalum, ubathravamaa illaama iru!)

~ "Kadangaari!" (literally means someone who owes you money. But its a common term to scold a child in Tamil.)

~ "If you keep doing like this, I ll just leave ok?" (Leave from the world actually but I keep that part open ended!!)

~ "What gall! Have nt sprouted three leaves and you talk this much?" (enna thimuru! mulaichu moonu ilai vidalai, enna pechu pesara?)

~ "If you talk like this, I ll leave once for all!" (and then mutter to myself because I cant bring myself to tell her yet - "afterwards you can cry Amma, Amma but I wont be there!") I know, I know! I'm a meanie!

~ "There are kids who are going hungry every day. Eat your food and don't waste it."

~ Rendum rendaappa, rendum keyandaappa! (Im baffled here for the translation. Literally means, "I ve two ladles and both of them are useless" and here the two ladles refer to Ashu & Antu!)

The most annoying thing my dad said which I'm repeating now:

"Ashu, everything has a lifetime. That zipper in the bag can be pulled up and down only like 100 times. If you unnecessarily keep doing it, it will stop working soon."
Replace zipper with light switch/TV remote/ballpoint pen/drawers/doors/windows/curtains/clips/fan/buttons,... and I use the same dialogue for everything!

*bangs head against the wall and then realizes that that's something her mom did too*