Mumbai.

I'm shaking with rage. I'm worried about people who I have not even met and only know them through their words. I am scared. I feel helpless. Watching the news only makes me more angry. "Terror strikes cricket"! Terror strikes cricket??? For Gods sake!

Stay safe, people. I know its tough. But that's all I'm able to say because I really want everyone to be safe.

Imai Irandum thani thani...

So Hd is away again. For two weeks this time. So like any self respecting girl, I cried and went running to "daddy" and my dad caught the next flight and arrived! :) Not exactly. But his visa was still valid and there were other stuff to consider, so he decided to come. This is the man who thinks twice before traveling to Madras from his home town and poor guy had to do two trips to Zurich in a short time all because his daughter asked him to. (More like son-in-law asked him to but I am not complaining!) Anyway, this post is not about that. I remember doing a post almost 2 years back - Sappy Me on how I discover some new song whenever Hd is away and repeat it to death. I swear I was nt even looking this time. So watched Vaaranam Aayiram last weekend and one song caught my attention and at last had some time to find the song on the net and listen to it yesterday. And what a song! Oh man, totally fell in love with it. It has been on indefinite loop fot the past 48 hours.(and this time totally annoying my dad!) Its on the background while Im typing this very post. I had the song on repeat even in the car today while I went to pick up Ashu from school. Anal mela pani thuli... Sung superbly by carnatic singer Sudha Raghunathan(although I feel guilty enjoying this song without the usual Bombay Jayashree.) and mind blowing lyrics by Thamarai. The lyrics are absolutely wonderful, I tell you. A woman in love, in pain, in want,... Sigh! And such a haunting music too. Now I cant wait for Hubby to come back and hear the song with me. So glad that the romance has nt withered and died. Yet.

Listen to it here.

anal mele pani thuli alai paayum oru kili
maram thedum mazhai thuli ivai dhaane ival ini
imai irandum thani thani urakkangal urai pani
edharkaaga thadai ini

endha kaatrin alaavalil malar ithazhgal virindhidumo
endha dheva vinaadiyil mana araigal thirandhidumo
oru siru vali irundhadhuve idhayathile idhayathile
unathiru vizhi thadaviyathaal amizhndhuvitten mayakkathile
udhirattume udalin thirai adhu thaan ini nilaavin karai karai

anal mele...

sandhithome kanaakkalil sila murayaa pala murayaa
andhi vaanil ulaavinom adhu unakku ninaivillaiyaa
iru tharaigalai udaithidave perugidu vaa kadal alaye
iru iru uyir thathalikkayil vazhi sollu vaa kalangaraye
unathalaigal enai adikka karai servathum kanaavil nigazhndhida

anal mele...

Thanks to Thamarai, we get to hear gems like these where a women sings about her desires. Have you ever wondered how few and far between they are? Did it all start with Vaseegara? From the top of your head, tell me the song which comes to your mind first. Anything in Hindi?

ps.
Sorry non Tamil folks. Theres no way I can translate this precious song in English even if I try. Any volunteers?

Vaaranam Aayiram.

If I want to see just excellent acting, I ll stay home and watch my 3 year old all day long. I don't go for a movie ONLY to watch excellent acting. I expect a good movie. But Vaaranam Aayiram is nt one. I don't know how to explain it though. I mean each scene on its own was good but they did nt add anything to the movie. Take the songs and dance away. Take the action scenes away. Take one of the romance angle away. What do you have? Nothing. Agreed that in real life, nothing makes sense so what can we expect from a story about a father and son and passage of time? I think it was nt interestingly shown. That's all. It was long and boring. I read some news today that Gautham has trimmed the movie and the kidnap scenes have been totally cut off. What the hell! So people who watched the movie in the first couple of days are idiots? Guinea pigs? This ain't fair, Mr. Menon.

Now for some thoughts:

So what else is new? Surya is awesome. And he proves it again and again.

Simran is good. Sameera Reddy is OK. Ramya is bad. I never liked Jyotika before. But after watching these two new heroines, I ve new found respect for Jo.

The supporting cast is excellent.

I think the word "daddy" has been used like a million times in this movie. Annoying! And the Guinness award goes to...

I had gone for this movie along with my Dad. He did nt like the movie either. For the record, I call him Appa. Never "daddy"! And the "daddy" of my two little girls sat at home while we went for a late night show. At least he can say he got a good night sleep.

I had not listened to the songs before. They were good. Loved the choreography. Surya has come a long way in the dance department, has nt he? Nice moves.

Surya does nt need a six pack for me to drool at him. All I can do at guys who go "Look at me! Look at me! I have a six pack" is *yawn*.

Needless to say, there were kids in the theatre (for a 11.30 pm show!) and the 5 year old boy behind me kept kicking my seat, pulling my hair and what not. And during one of the graphic drug scenes, he loudly asked his parents, "andha uncle ku pei pidichiduchaa"! (Is the uncle possessed by a spirit?)

Came out of the movie and while paying at the parking meter, the machine gave me an extra 10 cents. As if to mock me. Indha padatha paathu 10 paisa prayojanam unda? (Is the movie even worth 10 cents?) Hmpf!

I hope they don't trim the movie when my sis watches it next weekend. Yaan petra inbam... And she owes me one for Dasavatharam.

Two days at a time.

So Hd went out of the country on Sunday. For 2 days and 2 nights. Leaving me with 2 kids. I survived. The school run was the tough thing but otherwise things were pretty cool. So here's how it went.

Sunday

6.30 pm - Hd left.

Then I rock Antu to sleep. Feed Ashu dinner.

7.30 pm - Antu wakes up. I change her diaper, feed her lying on the bed. Ashu lies beside me. Antu goes to sleep and I put her in the crib.

8.15 pm - I give Ashu some laptop time and eat my dinner.

8.30 pm - I brush Ashus teeth, help her clean up her room and read her bed time stories.

9.15 pm - I lie down on the floor on a mattress while she goes to sleep on her bed.

9.30 pm - Shes asleep. I leave the room. Hubby calls. I do the dishes, clean the kitchen, brush my teeth and channel surf.

10.00 pm - The movie Transporter. I'm hooked. I watch. (I am a sucker for car chases.)

11.00 pm - Very sleepy. I record the rest of the movie and go to sleep.

Monday

1.55 am - Antu wakes up. I put her beside me and continue my sleep while she feeds.

3.50 am - Antu wakes up again. Since shes beside me already, she feeds again. I continue sleeping.

5.45 am - Ashu wakes up. Comes to our room and lies down near me. I continue sleeping.

6.30 am - Alarm goes off and I get up like a spring.

6. 30 to 8.15 am - Ashu drinks her milk, I drink my tea, I change Antus diaper, I pack lunch for Ashu, dress her up, dress Antu up, I dress up. Ashu eats cereal, I feed Antu and we are out of the door at 8.10 and in the car at 8.15.

8.45 am - I drop Ashu at school and get back home at 9.30 am. (traffic) Antu sleeps on the trip back.

9.45 am - I eat breakfast.

10 00 am - I feed antu.

10 to 11 am - I change diaper, I make lunch, talk to my parents on the phone and check mails.

11.15 am - I change diaper and feed Antu.

11.45 am - I eat my salad and get Antu ready in the car seat.

12.00 noon - We are out of the door.

12.25 pm - Reach school and pick up Ashu.

1.00 pm- Reach home. Both are sleeping. I wake Ashu up and she cries all the way to the 10th floor.

1.20 pm - Feed Antu. Feed Ashu lunch. I eat lunch.

2.30 pm - Antu goes to sleep. I clean up after lunch while Ashu lies down on the sofa licking a lollipop.

2.30 to 5.30 - Read books for Ashu. Change diaper for Antu. Feed Antu. Give snack for Ashu. Blog surf. Check mails. Run Ashu a bath. Feed. change. Make tea.

Because of the interrupted sleep all day long, Antu goes to deep sleep at 5 pm.

6.00 to 7.30 pm - Long phone call with my sis while Ashu is goofing around.(blowing raspberries and spraying every inch of the living room!) Then I prepare to make some dinner for myself. I feed Ashu her dinner. Brush her teeth and ask her to pick the books while I eat my dinner since Im starving.

8.00 pm - I'm hogging on the tortilla wraps while Ashu calls me. I ask her to wait until I finish my dinner. When I go to check on her 5 minutes later, shes snoring! Bliss.

9 00 pm - I wake Antu up, change her diaper and feed her. She goes to sleep. I catch up with Internet and doze off by 10.00 pm.

Tuesday

2.00 am - Antu wakes up...

Repeattu.

Thoughts

Its doable as long as none of us fall sick.

Ashu is in her perfect behaviour if its only me she has to deal with it.

Its enough if I talk to Ashu, tell her a story, read her a book or play with her. TV, Laptop, Chocolates, Candies and Lollipops mean NOTHING to her if she finds out that they are bribes and not treats. I learnt this lesson the hard way.

Antu is a doll. As long as her input and output are taken care of, shes one happy camper.

At 7 pm on Monday, Ashu had a meltdown and said "I want Appa NOW. I want my Appa" and 2 seconds later, Hd called. Freaked me out.

Going out for groceries or to a park would ve been a lot harder. If push comes to shove, I would do that too but its tough.

The trick is to eat BEFORE Im hungry. Feed Antu and Ashu BEFORE they get hungry. God save us if we all get hungry at the same time.

I did nt ve a minute to miss Hd.

I also have a strong suspicion that when a couple stay together in a loveless marriage for the kids' sake, it actually means "to share the burden of taking care of the kids".

5 pm to 7 pm is the craziest. If I ever kill myself, it would be precisely at 6.55 pm.

The second half of The Transporter sucked. Big time.

If you were me you would ve noticed that I did nt include taking a shower in the list. Thank God Hd was gone only for 2 days! And long live deos and perfumes.

Ashu feels alone.

Ashu has forgotten that she has a room and there are a million stuff in there for her to play with. I don't remember the last time she was in the room doing something on her own. Its rush, rush in the morning and she leaves for school. Comes back, has lunch and takes a nap on some days and skips on others. Then its snack time. Then an early dinner and goes to sleep. In between these, she is with Antu ALL the time. When I'm feeding Antu, shes lying down next to me. When I'm cooking, she lies down next to Antu in the play mat. Or sits next to the Bouncer and rocks her or talks to her or sings to her or tells her something. Talks to her in a gibberish language. Talks to me and tells me stuff Antu is doing. When I'm changing Antu, helps me by handing over a fresh diaper. And she talks. ALL the time. Questions, doubts, observations and imagination rule her life. Even when I remind her that she can do puzzles or play with her dolls or read(see) a book, she reluctantly brings them to the living room and half-heartedly does something for a few minutes and goes back to Antu. Its like her life revolves around Antu.I don't know what to make of it. I hope its just a phase because I feel sorry for the poor child. Shes absolutely aching for company. She is having a whale of a time during play dates with her class mates or when we go to a friends house who have kids too. But we are not able to do it on a regular basis. I think shes craving for kids her own age. Today she told me, "Lets call S home, Amma. I ll play with her and share all my toys with her." Broke my heart. So what do you parents do? Not many kids in this apartment of her age. Its getting too dark and too cold by 5 pm these days. Our friends don't live near us. Her school friends live too far away. I feel as if Ashu cant wait for Antu to grow up. Sigh! I should have had Antu first.

Food Allergy Awareness.

Tharini of Winkies Ways has started a Food Allergy Awareness Month. She has kick started the posts with her first post here and Sujatha of blogpourri has shared a wonderful and informative post in her blog. Theres more to come from Tharini and quite a few other bloggers as well. Also, check out Tharinis post on the difference between Food Allergy and Food Intolerance.

If you have done a post on Childhood Allergies in your blog in the past, please pass on the link in the comment space or by email. Or if you have any information to share, please do a post and leave the link here. I ll be doing a final round up of all related posts in the month end at IndianMommies, so do check it out. Lets all come together for this good cause and spread the awareness. Thanks in advance.

“If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried”.

When I got up today morning I got this insane idea to make Aloo Parathas for lunch. Yes, thats what I think about as soon as I wake up. Food. Actually, thats why I wake up these days. To eat. Otherwise, I will happily lay in bed all day long feeding Antu who does nt seem to have heard the famous Tamil proverb "Alavodu undu, valamodu vaazhanum" and is ALWAYS attached to my boob! Anyway, so I tell my idea aloud. Hd who is usually kicked up when I announce such things, snickers and asks, "But why?" I shush him up, finish the breakfast routine and attack the dough with vengeance. With the dough ready, I boil the potatoes and make the stuffing. I try to remember when I made Aloo paratha the last time. Circa 2001 I guess. And it was a disaster. But this time I am prepared. I ve seen the video a dozen times, read up the recipe hundred times and between then and now, I ve practiced making chapathis. About 5 times in these 8 years. So Im good, right? Like hell!

So I rolled out the dough, kept the ball of stuffing inside, closed it up on all sides and started rolling. Gently. The stuffing ran helter skelter, left the dough, bunched up at the edges, stuck to the rolling pin and on the counter. I took a long breath and rolled the second ball. But by now, the warning has been passed to the other balls about the hot frying pan situation and I swear that the stuffing stuck to the rolling pin and cried for help! And not to mention, the supposed to be round parathas looked like India map. With the stuffing bordering like Pakistan and Bangladesh. I was so upset. I screamed and shouted at Hd and startled the father daughter duo who were doing some project(play doh to mock me perhaps?) in Ashus room. "What happened Amma", asked Ashu very concerned. "These stup... I mean these silly parathas are nt coming out properly Ashu. My parathas suck!" "Its OK amma. Its OK. Don't be sad. Can I have some chapathi maavu to eat please?", she asked. Gave her some happily and asked Hd to look into the situation. "Why don't you mix up the stuffing and the dough and roll out? Its all the same, right?", asked Hd. "Why dont you eat some coffee powder and then drink the milk? Its all the same right?", I quipped. "Do whatever you want. It was nt my idea to make parathas", Hd barked and went away. Ashu swiped a little more chapathi dough and went away too. I shed some tears to make up for the less salt and finished rolling India maps with borders all the while muttering, "I'm smart. I should be able to make parathas. Why the hell cant I make some stupid parathas? I'm such a good cook and I cant even make these damn parathas. I can never start a food blog, I cant even make chapathis let alone parathas. I suck. I must be really stupid. May be theres a secret ingredient and no ones telling me. Yes, that must be it", I decided and finished frying the parathas. To leave no evidence, we ate all up. They were tasty yes but I would never serve it to anyone. They looked ghastly! I could ve taken some pictures and showed you guys. But I was afraid you all will judge me on what kind of mom I am. Who cant make parathas! And thats the reason I did nt tell you guys about the time I dropped the iPod on Antus head while feeding her. Oops!

This Diwali.

Inspired by YY, I managed to make this. Came out pretty good. Diwali Bakshanam under 10 minutes! Whowuddathunkit! Had people over for dinner tonight. In between nursing Antu and feeding Ashu and all the cooking and cleaning and making the kids sleep - hardly spoke two words with the guests. Whats the point, I ask! And Diwali on a Monday. Sigh! Ashu has a bad cold so dont know if she ll be going to school tomorrow. If only Hd can take off from work tomorrow, we all can sleep the day off! Whats Diwali without all the noise of bursting crackers anyway! Diwali used to be all about the "pudhu dress" back then. The charm is gone now since every shopping spree is about clothes these days! But the poor dad of mine bought all of us diwali clothes when he arrived last month. A pink(!) Tee shirt for Hd, some funky outfits for Ashu, a double XL(ahem!) salwar for me and some cute frocks for Antu. So gotta make do and pretend as if its a special day for Ashus sake. After all, first Diwali for Antu too. Since we were in India then, Ashus first was a blast! Poor Antu! Us second borns are always neglected. Anyway, Happy Deepavali, Folks! You have a good one.

Finally, we are now Four.

So dad left on Friday. The husband was travelling on work so I had to go to the airport to drop dad dragging the two kids along. I hate coming back to an empty house and was cursing Hd to hell and back ever since he told that he was travelling. Anyway, Friday morning - Ashu started getting upset. I had a lump in my throat and was controlling myself from bursting into tears. My dad was distracting himself doing the last minute things and Antu was blissfully smiling and cooing. Around noon, we got ready to leave. Ashu would nt wear her shoes or her jacket and started crying. "Let Thatha be here only, Ma. Don't go back to India, Thatha. Stay here and play with me ALL the time, Thatha", she kept repeating. I tried to explain to her that hes going back to his house, that his tickets are "finished", the police wont allow him to stay and all the crap but she would nt buy any of that. "What do you want to do, Ashu? Tell me. He has to go, OK?", I said very much annoyed. "I don't know what to do, Ma. But I don't want him to go", she replied equally annoyed. I just picked her shoes and jacket and went out of the house carrying Antu in her car seat. Ashu followed with tears and my dad picked her up and tried to explain. But she started sobbing again. "I understand you are upset , Ashu. I'm upset too. Its OK. You ll be OK soon. Wear your shoes now", I said. She cried even harder. "Do you want a lollipop, Ashu?" I asked. She nodded yes. "Then wear your shoes", I said and strapped her in the car. She was licking the lollipop happily and we reached the airport, checked in, left my dad at the gate, waved him goodbye, came back to the car, settled in and came back home. To an empty home. Now, wheres my lollipop? :(

Just Shoot Me.

A valuable advice for parents of single child who are planning to have a second one.

Keep talking in hushed tones,
Never raise your voice.
Even better, do NOT introduce talking to your child at all. You can do it once the second one comes along. Whats the hurry anyway?

OK, now for the reason.
I was feeding Antu in our bedroom with the door shut. After a loooooooong session, she was just about to doze off. I knew she would sleep at least for two hours and I was already planning which chore to finish first once she slept off. (Doing the dishes or folding the laundry - which is less mind numbing? Hmm... That a toughie!) Exactly then, Ashu opens the door with a bang and screams "Look Mommy!" and scares the bejeezes out of Antu. And Antu does three things at the same time - Bites me HARD, lets out an ear piercing scream and starts suckling again. All for what? To show some stupid blocks. If only I had nt given birth to this specimen! I managed a "Good job, Ashu. Now shut the door and go back to your room and play. Amma will come in a few minutes" with a fake smile while what I really really wanted to do was wring her neck and tell her, "Big deal! So you know how to build blocks! Now get out!"

On that note, is there anything more tortureous than an almost asleep baby waking up?

ps.
For others - do not have a second one. Or the first.

Just Tired.

No time to blog since my mom left. Not that I could nt squeeze some time to type but I just could nt gather my thoughts. Felt like my brain was cluttered.

So my dad arrived a week before my mom left. And hes leaving back to India in 10 days. When he came home from the airport, Ashu was thrilled. She held his hand and took him to our bedroom and showed him a sleeping Antu all excitedly. My dad told us later that he thought that Ashu was going to show him a toy or something and he had totally FORGOTTEN that Antu existed. He did nt ask about Antu to Hd from the airport till home. Since my sis was here that time, we all reminded Dad to be nice to Antu as well and not to spend every minute with just Ashu, the love of his life! And what has happened now? Hes spending every minute with ANTU!! She quietens down immediately if my dad picks her up, goes to sleep faster if he rocks her, saves her best smiles and giggles for him, ... and hes in love. Again.

Is nt it ironic that the man I feared when I was a child is now telling my child, "I cant give you candy. Your mom will scold me"! Revenge is oh so sweet! ;)

Ashus school is going well. We just drop her off at the gate from our car and she goes in with a teacher. So cool. But shes very unpredictable at home. One day, she ll skip to school and another day, she ll refuse to go to school. But thats just a regular kid for you.

Antu is 3 months old and is doing fine. She almost rolled over today. She just has to pull her hand out and she ll be there. My dad, Ashu and I stood around her and cheered, clapped and video taped and made a merry celebration when she was attempting to roll over today. I became misty eyed and all! But then, damn the hormones, Im getting misty eyed even while peeling potatoes. The poor, poor potatoes! *bawl*

The fun things apart, do you know whats the best time of the day for me? When both the kids are sleeping. Its just so exhausting spending every minute with them and for them. Hds job is not so hectic, Ashu goes to school for half a day and shes mostly good when shes home, Antu sleeps and feeds like a dream and to top it all, my dads here to give me a hand whenever I want. And still, its EXHAUSTING. After Ashu goes to school and its just Antu, I think "This is doable. I just have to feed, change and make her sleep. This is nt so bad". And when Antu is asleep or with my dad or Hd and Im reading a book with Ashu, Im like "Its fun to be with Ashu and do things. Why was I feeling so exhausted with just her before Antu?" But put the said infant and the child together and I go mad. To quote one of my favorite bloggers, "Adhi Bayangaramulu"!!

The title of this post is the same as my previous post.

Time: Yesterday.
Place: Booville.

Me - So Ashu, Paati is leaving tomorrow huh?
Ashu - *silence*
Me - So who's going to be here?
Ashu - Thatha.
Me - And when is he leaving?
Ashu - October.
Me - Yes. Perimma and Perippa came right? And then they left. Paati came and shes leaving tomorrow. Thatha came last week. And he ll be leaving soon too. And THEN?
Ashu - *in an eager voice* Then Antu will go back into your tummy?
Me - !!!!!!

As the wise Pasupathi once told, "That that person. Their their worry."(Avan avanukku avan avan kavalai!!!)

ps.
Yes, mom left today and I stepped into the kitchen to make tea for the first time in 3 months. I know. I'm spoilt rotten. But its time to stop being a pampered daughter and pick up the reins. And Im trying to do just that. Vera vazhi?

"Having a sister is like having a best friend you can't get rid of. You know whatever you do, they'll still be there."

I hate family reunions because they come to an end. Sis and Bil left early morning today back to the US. Dad, Hd, Ashu and Antu are taking a nap. Mom and I just finished three back to back games of Ticket to Ride(I won all of them, thank you for asking!) and while my mom is sulking, I looked at our living room now looking empty without the two big suitcases and all the stuff that were here for the past two weeks. When would we see each other next? Antu would nt even remember them the next time. Ashu as always never talks about people after they leave. Mother of all denials, this one has. This time Sis and Bil got her a cute toy stroller. She was over the moon. They said and did all the right things with the kids. I don't how to describe the feeling but they are just so perfect with the kids. Its even scary for me as if they understand my every move. Or may be we are tuned the same way. I know I can leave my kids with my mom without a backward glance but she would do things her way and I am not saying its wrong. But knowing that your kids will be loved as much you love them and in the same way you love them is such an overwhelming feeling. Thank you Sis and Bil for being the rock. You guys are truly phenomenal! :)

We hardly left the house. Mom was doing all the cooking and we stayed home, ate, played games, talked, caught up,... Dad arrived from India on Wednesday with sweets, savouries, new clothes for all us, gifts, etc... and we had a gala time. As if its Diwali already. Sigh! Now no time to sulk as moms leaving in 2 days. Got to save the tears.

By the way, as promised I offered Antu to Bil and he was very keen to pack her and take her with him since she saved all her cutest smiles and coos for him. But then we both forgot a small something while striking our deal. Hd. He totally refused to give up Antu. Sentimental fool that he is!

Little girls need their mommies.

Sis and Bil came back from their Italy trip on Tuesday morning. My dad arrived from India on Wednesday night. So yes, another one of our loony family reunions taking place in Zurich for the first time. Yippee! Ashu is in heaven. She resisted school on Thursday morning and she had to be unglued from my fathers arm but she was OK afterwards. She happily left for school on Friday. And something else happened too. There was a coffee morning I had to attend with some school moms. So I took Antu along with me. So far I have been walking Ashu to her class and help her take her jacket and shoes off. I asked her if I can drop her off at the car park and can she go into her class on her own with one of the teachers help. Otherwise I ve to park, take Antu in her car seat and go into the school. Ashu accepted. So I stopped the car in the school driveway and one of the teachers opened the door, helped Ashu and took her in. I was of course in tears seeing my little girl go. Sigh!

Antu was OK when we went to school and was OK on the way to the friends house. Was ok when we were there. But cried non stop when I picked up Ashu and came back home. Even the pacifier did nt work. Ashu was quite shaken by Antus crying. So far she has nt seen Antu cry like that. According to her, if the baby cries, Amma will feed her or change her or carry her or make her sleep. So she was very upset that I was nt doing anything to console Antu. Amma, shes crying Amma. Antus crying Amma, she kept repeating in a sad tone. I told her that Im driving and I am not able to help her and we will be home soon and she ll be OK. Ashu even hummed a song and tried to console Antu. My poor darlings! But this is going to be the routine once my mom leaves on Wednesday. (Sis and Bil leave on Sunday.) Even though my dad will be here for sometime, hes not my mom! Boo hoo hoo! :(

School saga continues...

Sis and Bil reached here on Friday morning from the US. I took them with me when I went to pick up Ashu from school at 12.30. The teacher told me that she was very quiet and slept for an hour. Ashu came crying to me and did nt even look at her dear Aunt and Uncle. We walked to a park nearby and slowly Ashu cooled down and started talking to them. We came back home and the weekend passed like a blur. On Sunday, we rented a van and went to Schaffhausen to see the Rhine Falls. Ashu had fun and Antu was quite a sport. All of us enjoyed the trip. Ashu as always clinged to Sis and Bil and wanted every waking minute to be spent with them. Then Monday morning dawned and she absolutely refused to go to school. She began screaming and crying and chanting non stop, "I don't want to go to school Amma". I bundled her up with everyones help and left for school with Bil entertaining her in the car with story after story. She would nt let go of me when we went into the classroom and started screaming again. Miss D was on leave and Miss M, the assistant teacher took her from me. She told me that Ashu is very quiet and does nt play with the children but by her own. Participates in activities but does nt talk or answer. She asked me what she says about school to me. I told her that she talks like school is fun and tells me every bit of detail about school, about who did what, etc... Miss M was happy to hear that. I left a screaming Ashu and came back home. I was very upset. And as always guilt was the first thing to attack, Self doubt, next. Am I doing something wrong? Does Ashu hate school? Should I be talking more in English at home? Should we move back to India? Should I home school her? Is it because of Antu? Am I not giving her enough attention? Is it because of my mom being here? Will she be ok after Mom leaves or will it be worse? Finally I shook myself and told myself, "I am NOT doing anything wrong. I am a GREAT mom. She ll be OK soon" and went back to pick her up at 12.30 albeit with a heavy heart. Miss M was holding Ashus hand and as soon as I went in she told me, "Ashu was so good today. She had so much fun" and Ashu came and hugged me with a wide smile! Whaddayaknow?????? Miss M also told me that Ashu said that Mommy loves the new baby more and it hurts her. The little rat!! Anyhoo, off we came back home with Ashu chattering about what she did in school and how much fun she had! Phew!

Sis and Bil left for their Italy trip last night and are back here on Tuesday. Ashu was mighty upset yesterday and was in a fowl mood when they left. She asked for my sis when she got up today and started saying "I don't want to go to school Amma". Oh Boy! I bundled her up as usual and dropped her in the class and ran home. She was whimpering and not screaming like yesterday. So some improvement! I am about to go and pick her up now. And I have no clue how shes going to be. Crying or smiling? Quiet ot chatty? Kids! They just exist to drive us crazy.

"Naama vera veetla porandhu irukalaam da!"

Ashu: So what do you think? Does Mom deserve us?
Antu: Its too early to say. Give me another 2 months.

On that note,
Ashu is 3 years and 4 months old today.
Antu is 2 months old today.

And my dearest Bil is ... just OLD today! Happy Birthday, Dude! Looking forward to see you and Sis on Friday. Your birthday present is all wrapped and ready to go. Let me recheck. Is that Ashu or Antu you want? Well, I'm in a generous mood today. Take them both! :)

Ashus Art Gallery.

Since we came to Zurich 18 months back, Ashu has been showing off her artistic and creative skills around the house. Her favorite place is the wooden step stool where she exhibits her art pieces. The artist shows keen interest on fruits, flower vases, coasters and other miscellaneous kitchen items. The resident photographer has managed to take photos and videos the lucky few times the said artist was ready and willing for a photo shoot. Apparently, the artist is not big on publicity. Her art is mostly meant only for herself and her creator! Here are a few unique exhibits from the artist's gallery.

1. Standing Tall.
Items used - 1 ripe banana, 2 clementines and an apple. On a step stool.
Dated November 2007 when the artist was a mere 27 month old.



2. The Banana Wall.
The artists favorite fruits appear again in this piece with the wooden floor used as canvas. Dated December 2007.

3. Plate of Steel.
An Idli plate is used here. For the filling, a broken tea strainer, cooker weight, an empty bottle and a bottle lid.
Dated circa December 07.

4.Titled "Classroom", this piece features for the first time, the artists favorite dolls. Its interesting to note that while each of the dolls get one book each, her favorite bear gets two!
Dated Late December 2007.

5. Aptly titled "The Muffin Tray", this proves the rumour true that the artists mother can bake nothing but muffins to save her life. The artist has gone one step further to prove that one need not even bake to eat apples and tomatoes. This piece also goes by the name "Appadiye Saapidalaam".
Dated around June 2008 possibly when the artist quit eating muffins.

6. Coasters and Petals.
This rare photo captures the artist at work. This unique piece is created by stuffing a flower vase tightly with coasters and then filling the top with fake rose petals. Please note the interesting usage of color.
Dated February 2008.

7.Films and Coaster.
An idea for a centre piece, perhaps? A coaster is surrounded by colorful films which were part of a book and a camera. And with this, the artist takes a bow!

All works are copyrighted. Please email if you have purchase enquiries!

ps.
Watch out for the budding artists exploits with the doodle board in the next couple of days.

Late Night Show with the Joker.

At last, after the entire world has watched and raved, we got to watch The Dark Knight. The movie got released in Swiss only on 21st Aug. Hd and I went for a late night show on Friday. So far we ve never left both the kids with my mom at home. But since the show started only at 11.45 pm and Antu has sort of got into a routine, we decided to risk it. Thankfully, both the girls slept the whole time, so relief. Cant say the same about my mom though. She was thinking we ll be back by 2.30 and started worrying when she got up around 3 am and did nt find us back. We were back at 3.15 am. Moms! When will they stop worrying? ;)

Needless to say, LOVED the movie. Bale, Ledger, Oldman, Freeman and Caine. By Nolan. How can it go wrong? The Joker was truly mesmerising. Could nt believe it was the same guy who acted in 10 things I hate about you. Heath Ledger. Sigh! Cant help but wonder what could have been...

First day to Pre-School.

So Ashu started school. Even though she started play school when she was 30 months old, we did nt take it very seriously. 2 afternoon hours in a day is nothing and we bunked school a lot. But yesterday was her first day to pre-school. Where she ll spend a solid 3 1/2 hours. Where she has to take a lunch box and eat on her own! Ashu was in tears during the orientation day on Monday even when I was with her. Oh ho, I thought. We left the house by 8 am yesterday. Hd and I took her to the classroom. She swallowed tears and asked me not to go. But I promised her that I ll be back and left her. She was okay. It helped that most of her friends from her previous class are in the same class with her. When I went to pick her up, she looked so happy. She had finished the very little spaghetti I had packed for her lunch but had left the apples uneaten. I ve no complaints! ;) Then she went on and on about her day in the car. Seemed like she had fun. She slept on the way in the car and continued her nap at home. The pattern continued today too. Her two new teachers are very friendly and I can see that Ashu likes them already.

Yesterday I came home after dropping her at school and the house was unusually quiet in spite of my mom and Antu being at home. There was a lump in my throat. This is it, I thought. My baby girl has flown the nest. Theres no going back now. My mom tried to cheer me up but what does she know how I feel! :(

Rhyme for no reason.

The other day Ashu and I went shopping and passed by the toys section. Ashu pointed at a colorful box and asked what it is. "Those are Chalk Piece, Ashu. In all colors", I replied. She thought for a moment and asked, "Can I eat them?" So I told her "No Ashu. You don't eat chalk, remember Chula and Mieja had drawn Kolams with chalk in front of their house? They are for drawing". "You don't eat Chalk Piece aa?", she asked again and I said No. Two seconds later, she asks "We should not eat Chick Peas then?"

I bent down to her level and laughed. For a whole minute.

Then yesterday my mom was telling her about my childhood and how I fed milk to the cats in a Kottankachi(coconut shell) when I was a kid. She came to me and repeated the story and how I fed the cats. She could nt pronounce kottankachi properly and I helped her. A while later, I asked her who drinks milk from a kottankachi. She thought for a moment and screamed, "ottakachiveengi"!( Giraffe in Tamil!)

Kottan"kachi" & Otta"kachi"veengi! Who wudda thunk it?