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May 29, 2013

Ashu's First School Trip.

Hd and I got married one fine day in June and about 2 weeks later, he joined work. It was around 8 am and he was getting into his car and I was standing near the gate waving goodbye and felt this huge lump in my throat! Tears were about to roll down my cheeks and I did nt want him to see them so I just smiled and went inside. But he knew. We never talked about it later and even to this day, almost 13 years later, its hard for me to see him leave even if hes just going to get the mail! But of course the feeling is nt as intense as it was the first time he left and I even forgot how intense it could be and how hollow it makes you fell. Until yesterday. 

Ashu left on a school trip. Her stupid school trip! (Thats what I ve been calling it for the past one month, much to her annoyance!) I was all fine until the weekend. Then I started worrying! How will she manage! What would she do! What would I do! We bought her a new suitcase, a new sleeping bag, packed her stuff, gave her a million instructions, quizzed her on trivial things and when the day and time arrived, my dad, Hd and I walked her to school. She saw her best friend and stuck to her. The friends mom and I looked at each other and could nt say much because both of us had worry written all over our faces! The girls climbed into the bus, sat next to each other and buckled their seat belts. For a minute, I thought of grabbing her and running away! Hd was keeping an eye on me because he was sure I would do something utterly crazy! My dad kept on asking Ashu "Are you sure you want to go?" and Ashu was rolling her eyes at him! I took a photo and waved and blew her a kiss and the bus went on its way! This was Monday morning 9.40 am! I will see and hear from her next on Friday 2.30 pm! Needless to say, Im a nervous wreck! I cant even remember a day I did nt talk to Ashu in the last 8 years and now I cant hear her voice for over 3 1/2 days! I dont know what shes doing, what shes eating, what shes wearing,...! Sigh!

The house is eerily silent in spite of 4 adults and Antu! And the lump in my throat and the butterflies in my stomach are refusing to leave! Sorry Hd, the first time you left is a walk in the park compared to this one. But Im glad you are suffering along with me because I cant do this alone!

I know there would be many, many more trips and good byes but I dont think I ll ever forget this day. I dont want to.

12 comments:

yaadayaada said...

Well. I have been walking around with a lump from yesterday!! The picture made it all the more real!!

Anonymous said...

Aah I could hear your heart throb through these words ...

Anonymous said...

I can fully understand that hollow feeling.. experienced it when we came back after dropping the daughter at college dorm...
Hugs Boo... idho vandhachu friday :)

Sujatha ramesh

www.momsters.in said...

Awwwwwwww. It is a HUGE step isn't it? My daughter starts school in 10 days and I'm nervous, scared, excited everything.

Bong Mom said...

Waiting to hear how the trip was. So far, the 9 year old has gone only on day trips and I have had sinister thoughts. Power to you and thanks for sharing the courage.

Anonymous said...

School camps already! Anjana had hers only in 5th grade. Just think that she is doing something fun and is very happy out there. You will be fine. It is only when you start worrying, it is miserable. That's how I dealt with it. :) Don't worry, she will be back very soon with lot of wonderful stories to update the blog soon :)
-San

Vidya said...

Isn't it too soon for overnight trip (for you I mean)? I cant even leave the kid for a sleepover with her friend. I have to sleepover at their place. Looking at your post, i feel I have to grow up a lot :-(

Anonymous said...

Waiting for your next interesting post..What a bye..Hugs Boo..

Anonymous said...

Boo, Trip epdi irundhuthu?

Sujatha Ramesh

Unknown said...

Thanks for share. baby jordans

Gunjan Khaitan said...

Truly understand how difficult it must hv been for u to let go off ur daughter for this school trip of hers...Haah! I dont know if I would be able to do this ever!

Unknown said...

I can see your hollow feelings. When My kid was going for school trip I was crying badly. I was nervous, excited and anxious also.
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