27.04.2011

Dearest Ashu,

You turn six today! Like your Perimma remarked the other day, you are not a kid anymore. But a young girl! At least that's what the the clothing store is labeling you. You look quite grown up all of a sudden too. You talk like one most definitely. You are so profound at times that I go completely speechless. One day I spilled some milk on the kitchen counter and was cleaning it. You happened to be there and I told you, "See Ashu? It was an accident. I spilled some milk and I'm mopping it. Everyone makes mistakes and its OK!" Because you think you are Miss.Perfect and whenever you make some mistakes, you go out of your way to defend yourself and we both always get into an argument over that! For which you replied, "You have your mistakes, Amma. I have mine" and walked away. Whats the word? Yes, speechless. You are also brutally honest. Like the other day when you asked me to draw a heart for you and I did. When I asked you how the heart looked you said, "Its not perfect. But its better than mine." Sigh.

As always, we traveled a lot this year too and my heart swells with pride to see what a good traveler you are. Whether it was our week long Norway trip where I did nt include anything kid oriented just because it was our anniversary trip or the Yosemite road trip from San Jose or the camping trip or the annual trips to the US and India, the special Kerala trip this year or the local trips within Swiss or the recent Disneyland trip, I cant remember you giving me trouble for anything anywhere. I so wish you teach a thing or two to your sister though! You also spent loads of time with your Grand Parents, Perimma & Perippa and various other relatives and friends and like I repeat every year, don't forget how lucky you are that they are part of your life. Especially your Perippa who came all the way from the US to surprise you on your birthday this year armed with gifts. What a treat!

You became a Kinder Garten Girl this year and to see you so proud of your school, class, teachers and friends is heart achingly beautiful. You think your teachers know everything and even your Super-Mom comes only second to them. It makes me so happy that you are in such a healthy and cheerful environment when you are away from home. G has been with you for the third year in a row and am crossing my fingers for the next. You had a fantastic time skiing this season with your best buddy S. You danced on stage with 5 other little girls. Twice. Though the swimming classes keep getting interrupted, you love water. Another thing you love is climbing. Last year the same time, I never thought that you would do these things. I cant believe that the rather reserved five year old Ashu disappeared although I see her now and then. But that's because you are selective. Which is really brilliant, if you ask me. I wish I were like that. And oh, you eat Broccoli. Willingly.

Although you seem to be a serious girl, you can be downright silly when you want to be. Right to the point of annoying. God knows why you save those phases only for me though! While you talk like a grown up about certain things, I'm glad you have your childish innocence intact too. Like how you wanted the Ben 10 t-shirt and when I gently asked you when you are planning to wear it, you replied, "I will wear to school, Amma! I don't care if people think only boys wear Ben 10 clothes." And when we were reading some happily ever after story, you remarked, "You know, Amma? Even a man and a man can marry. Woman and woman too!" I don't know where that came from but am glad it did. You are still obsessed with being a twin and I'm dreading the day you ll start reading the St.Clare's series because that's when my obsession began. With the O'Sullivan twins. I apologize in advance, OK? It was nt in my hands. Because if I could have had two of you, I most certainly would have.

Antu and you are inseparable these days. It might sound outright silly to you but I drop whatever it is I'm doing and start listening to your conversations on the sly because they are unbearably cute! The way you look out for your sister is amazing. Whether its holding the elevator doors for her or helping her climb a chair or help her dress up, you are there for her 100%. I used to think that my sister was born an older sis. She was so mature and responsible even at a very young age. God knows why I doubted you when I was expecting Antu. You have turned out exactly like that. The other day in the park, you and I were sitting on the steps and eating a snack while Antu and a little older boy were running around in circles. Antu was following him like a puppy and both our gazes were following them. Then the boy turned a corner out of our vision and Antu followed him. Even before I said something or got up, you were up and running behind Antu. It took you only a split second to do that and I was totally amazed. How did you know to do that? Was it instinctive? I have never been more proud of you than that moment. May you and Antu always look out for each other. That's my only prayer. Happy 6th Birthday, Darling!

Love,

Amma.

Disneyland.

We went to the Disneyland in Paris and came back home yesterday exhausted and bankrupt. What a money pit! The kids of course had fun but the way Antu was enjoying in the hotel lobby and thinking that that was Disneyland, we could have easily fooled Ashu too and could have had a cheaper vacation!!! Hd and I had been to Disneyland some 9 years back and I remember how excited I was and how much I enjoyed the make-believe world! And when we planned to go during the spring break as a birthday gift for Ashu, she was ecstatic. A few of her friends have been there and she had a general idea about the place. For the past one month, we talked about nothing but Disneyland. At last the D day arrived last Wednesday and after a hearty breakfast and a packed lunch, we piled the kids in the car and took off. Eight hours and a million "Are we in Disneyland yet?" later, we arrived at the Dream Castle Hotel. The hotel lobby was like a theme park in itself with loads of coin operated rides and games and Antu screamed "Yay! Disneyland!" and dived head first into the ball pit! Like I said, we should have taken a hint and had our vacation just there!

The next morning all excited we drove off to the theme park. Ashu spotted the castle and was in high spirits. We parked our car in the huge parking lot and walked and walked and walked some more to the entrance only to find the entire world and its uncle standing in line to get in! Spring break and Disneyland! What was I even thinking?! We entered and took the sights in and all excitedly I was showing Ashu everything. Straight to Fantasyland of course and we began our marathon "standing-in-line" with the Snow White and the Seven Dwarves ride. To say that Ashu was terrified would be an understatement! Such a jujube ride but she got so scared because it was dark and when the evil queen turned around, she was a witch! I think its time to toughen up the kid with some real Kollywood masala films! When we went and stood in line for the Peter Pan ride, the entire time we were waiting(which would be 45 minutes!) she kept saying "I dont want to go!" But of course she loved the ride and wanted to go again once we were done! I told her that theres no going AGAIN in Disneyland and that happens only in the hotel lobby! Antu of course was a total daredevil throughout. She wanted to go on the Carousel and even that had a 70 minute waiting time! Promised her that I ll take her on the carousel in the park near our house and ran away! We had some lousy lunch and stood in more lines and went on more rides and just before 4 pm, came back to the Main Street and plonked our behinds in the hard ground so as to save seats to watch the Disney Parade which begins at 5 pm. While the dad and daughter duo walked off to explore more, a sleeping Antu in her stroller and me with a heavy back saved seats for them while inhaling secondhand smoke! (Welcome to France!) I am sure this was Thirupathi Venkatachapalathy's plan of secret revenge on me when I got so annoyed standing in lines for hours in Thirupathi this one time long, long ago and swore I would never go there again! (Sorry Balaji!) Antu woke up in time for the parade and the sheer joy in the kids faces when they saw the parade was almost worth it. I said almost! Then we went on the most awesome ride ever - The Buzz Lightyear Laser Blast. That was the only ride we went on again the next day too! After a dinner of fries and hot chocolate(Naanga Vegetarians kettelaa?) we left the place finally at 10 pm after twelve straight hours. We all slept even before our heads hit the bed.

The next day was almost rinse and repeat except that we spent half a day in the nearby Walt Disney Studios which was relatively less crowded and was loads of fun. Hd had also reserved a table for us in one of the restaurants where the Disney characters came to visit. So Ashu was in heaven and armed with an autograph book and a pen, hounded Mickey, Minnie, Woody, Pluto, Goofy, etc... for their signatures. We also met Sully and Buzz and Ashu had this fantastic idea that she can sign all their names by herself, why wait in line! Excellent point, I thought! We bought a fastpass for the Buzz Lightyear ride and went on it again taking turns since Antu was napping. There was a mile long line even to get the fastpass! We also managed to lose Antu for 10 seconds which felt like an eternity and madam was cooly walking off with another family! May be she was trying to tell me something! And the polar opposite Ashu who thought she got lost even though I was watching her and burst into tears! Sigh! What an odd pair of sisters! We "showed" the kids the Disney Store and quickly vamoosed out of it! Pagal kollai! The kids were also good as gold and did nt open their mouths. I did want to buy a costume for Ashu after seeing every other kid walking in a Princess costume or a Peter Pan costume but Ashu was very particular about what she wanted and would nt settle for anything less and lucky for me and unlucky for her, the stores there did nt stock it! Phew. Because if they did, we would have to sell our car to pay for the costume and walk back home!

The third day we drove to the city and showed the popular sights to Ashu from the car. We only stopped near the Eiffel tower to take a few pictures and then proceeded to Saravana Bhavan for lunch. Parking was a nightmare there and the customer service even more nightmarish! Hd literally had to restrain me from punching that sorry excuse of a waiter! At last we left around 5 pm and around 10 pm, decided to break the journey and stayed in a hotel on the highway and came home only the next day. We also experienced a hail storm which came out of nowhere and surprised us. Wonder whats with us and hail storms. Happened once before too. Anyway, we had a good break and the kids had super fun. Parent trap or not, we ll always have Disneyland! :)

Bye- Byes and BFFs.

S and I came to Zurich pretty much the same time a little more than 4 years back. I would nt say we clicked immediately. Im sure the prim and proper S said Hi to me so as not to be rude! :) Her daughter, another S, and Ashu are of the same age. Their birthdays are a week apart. Our respective husbands were working for the same company then. This was all it needed to become friends in a strange country. Our friendship grew with each meeting and I think it was sealed when I announced I was pregnant with Antu and she said, "me too!" She went on to have a beautiful baby boy 2 months after Antu was born. I was in heaven. We compared notes on breast feeding, sleep training, teething, ... and we were truly together in sickness and health! :)

Its so difficult to develop friendships once ones out of school and college. There seems to be a little formality especially when you see the other person as the husband's colleague's wife. I think I crossed that stage when more than a year back when I was really sick and Hd was traveling and I picked up the phone and the only person I could call was S. I decided she is my BFF whether she likes it or not! Also, shes immensely creative and talented and has magic in her hands. It would be easy to have her as a friend and admire her instead of being distant and jealous! ;)

We went on many trips together as a family and our daughters bonded. Too bad that Antu and Y could nt follow their sisters' footsteps. (Though Antu did bully the boy whenever she got a chance!) Their decision to go back to India happened very suddenly and before I could get over the shock, they were packed and ready to go. Two weeks is too less to reminisce about the four years together. Eight of us ladies went to dinner on Friday to bid adieu to S and we ended up laughing so much that my jaw still hurts. I could nt have cried even if I wanted to. Then we met them again on Sunday for lunch. Ashu wrote and illustrated a book for her BFF instead of an usual card. It was uber sweet.

Bye bye, dear Friend. You will be sorely missed. Like Ashu said, "Its so unfair!" When I told another friend that S was leaving, her immediate reaction was, "Oh God! What are you going to do?" Sigh! What AM I going to do without you, S? :(

CSA – A Father’s perspective.

(A guest post written by the husband on Child Sexual Abuse Awareness.)

It is not too long back that I realized that Child Sexual Abuse (CSA) is so rampant in our society. I was horrified to hear about stories of young girls being abused by uncles and good friends from the neighbourhood. At first I couldn’t even comprehend the fact that a 4 or 5 year old could be sexually abused! Yes I have been naïve and I am ashamed about my lack of awareness. It is painful to note that CSA is rampant in the current world. A few weeks back there was a news of a mother making pornographic video with her 2 year old. This news really brought tears to my eyes and my heart sank.

I grew up as an only child and was brought up in a bubble by my parents. I have been so lucky that I was not even aware about such a serious abuse being faced by many of my friends during my school days. Ofcourse I was aware of the senseless brushes, vulgar looks of men and how they train their eyes on young school going girls when they travel by public buses. It never used to disturb me then when I was a boy. I just used to think yes these guys are really rogues but nothing beyond. Now I see and understand the long lasting scars that such unpardonable acts leave on people’s lives.

As a father I am starting to feel so paranoid and insecure about the world into which I have got my kids into. Their innocence and the world surrounding them makes me feel so guilty and helpless at times. How am I going to protect my kids as a parent and how to ensure that my child comes and tells me about a bad touch or a bad intentional approach by a friend or stranger? These days even when I meet with my friends in a kid’s birthday party, I get so conscious before I hug or kiss a child for his or her birthday. Even with my own kids, I sometimes get conscious and ask a question if I am really overdoing it when I hug or kiss them. Such thoughts makes me wonder..God what kind of a world I am in and why is my mind starting to think in lines that I never imagined a few years back. And what are we going to do to make this world a better place for our kids.

I think it is important to educate our children from the age of 4 onwards about good touch and bad touch. We need to constantly let our children knowhow it is important to be open to parents when a friend or a family member behaves in a weirdly affectionate way with them. It is very tricky to educate kids about such an issue at such an age. I pains me to realize how we as parents need to sensitize our kids about such evil issues at such a tender age and still how helpless we are in this world as we cannot always be around and watchful with our kids at school and public places, etc., I am not even sure if such education at tender age is going to have the desired impact on our children or it is just going to clutter or complicate a beautiful mind. At the same time I also realize that we have no other option in this world. There is no point in being in denial. We need to reinforce the importance of this matter in our children and hope that they come and tell us at the first instance when they see or face such an act.

The most worrying point is that I am still very doubtful if our kids will be comfortable to come and report such incidents to mom or dad. CSA is a real evil and unpardonable offense that occurs widely across the world. But it has been such a taboo issue that people like me are starting to realize about the wide spread prevalence of this menace only now. I would like to laud the bloggers for their efforts to put up this CSA awareness blog. Its time we spoke about it.

What a Match!

Boo and kids Venue: P's house.

Who was present? P, me and 3 more moms and kids. (Their respective husbands were all traveling.)

Menu: Dal, paneer, pajma, rice, rotis, puris, tiramisu, cake, muffins, tea,...

HD's Venue: D's house.

Who was present? The host and 3 more families.

Menu: Rice, stew, dal, salad, apple crumble,...

HD's second innings Venue: A pub.

Who was present - A friend and 100 more cricket fans!

Menu: Beer!

This information is so that everyone knows what we were doing and where we were when History was made! Though Im sad that Hd and I were nt together, it was better this way. Why, you ask? Because we both watched Ind Vs Eng in D's house and it was a tie. Hd watched Ind Vs SA there and we lost. Hd was in Amsterdam and I was home for the Ind Vs Aus and we won. Hd was in Geneva and I was home for the crucial Ind Vs Pak match and we won! So of course we had to get separated for the greater good! Im nothing if not logical! ;) So when Tendulkar got out and Hd called and said he was still in D's house, I yelled at him like I ve never yelled before and asked him to hit the pub asap as per our original plan! Im sure the man caught the train before I could change my mind! So now you know why we won! :) Good job, Team India! I am glad we lived to see this day and not carry the picture of Kapil Dev and his 1983 trophy to our graves!

So where were you?

Child Sexual Abuse Awareness Month - April 2011.

All through April, there is going to be a lot of discussion, posts, expert opinions, helpful information, point to ponder, statistics, dos and donts about Child Sexual Abuse Awareness across many blogs. If its one blog you should nt miss reading, it is this - http://csaawarenessmonth.wordpress.com/

The blogathon begins on April 1st.

Please support the initiative. Here's how.


If you would like to add to the discussion or know somebody else who would, please note that entries are welcome.

a. mailed to csa.awareness.april@gmail.com OR
b. posted as FB notes and linked to Child Sexual Abuse Awareness Month Page OR
c. posted on your own blog with the logo and linked to the main blog OR
d. linked or posted on Twitter tagged twitter.com/CSAAwareness OR
e. sent via some/all of the above methods

If you are wondering what to write about, the list of topics is available here. Or you can choose your own topic related to CSA. Anonymous contributions are accepted and requests for anonymity will of course be honored. Bloggers can publish guest posts too.

Please remember to send in a mail with all necessary links or just your input to csa.awareness.april@gmail.com

Hats off to Kiran and Monika who have been working hard round the clock to put everything together.

Gotta love this girl!

Ashu: Amma! Come and play a game with me.
Me: Not now, Ashu. Im making dinner.

(2 mins later)

Ashu: Amma come!
Me: Im not done yet. Why dont you play something with Antu? I ll join you when Im done.

(5 mins later)

Ashu: Amma! What game do you want to play?
Me: Anything. You choose.
Ashu: Ok. Come.
Me: ASHU! I ll come when Im done, OK? Dont keep calling me.
Ashu: But Amma...
Me: Shush! I dont want to hear one more word.

(Silence)

(I spot her playing by herself with some sight words flash cards.)

(A good 15 mins later)

Ashu: Amma look at this!

And this is what she had done with the flash cards!



I laughed and joined her for a game. I even let her win! :)

Milestones.

Another birthday came and went. Ashu made a lovely card for me. She asked me a couple of days earlier, "Are you going to be 25, Amma?" "Oh I wish, Ashu! I wish! But I'm going to be 33", I told her. "But why would you wish to be younger, Amma? I don't want to be younger. I cant wait to be 6. I feel like I'm already six." Ah! To be young and foolish again! Hd took us to a nice restaurant nearby for a Sunday brunch after surprising me with a pineapple cake! Then we dropped the kids at a good friends place and went for a movie. The Adjustment Bureau. Very interesting story but the end was a bit disappointing! Matt Damon and Emily Blunt were really good. One particular hospital scene was really powerful.

On other news, I completely forgot to mark a milestone. Antu is successfully potty trained by day. It has been almost a month now and I cant believe we got to this point. I was most skeptical because she was nt showing any signs. She was going to playschool. She has to spend so much time in the car so I was wondering where to begin and how to manage. I just let her diaper free one Friday and it was a disaster! But Day 2 was slightly better and Day 3, she could tell me that she wanted to use the bathroom and there were no accidents. I still sent her in diaper to the play school that week but kept her diaper free at home. By that weekend, she was 100% consistent. So I sent her to playschool without diapers and told the caregivers to remind her to use the bathroom. And Voila! She did it! All on her own! Add to that, shes also showing signs that shes ready to be night trained because her diapers are always dry! I cant believe Ashu and Antu are such opposites! Even though Ashu was potty trained earlier than Antu, she took forever to be night trained. Anyway, so thats that! Im done with diapers! Forever! End of an era! :) Funny that 2 weeks back, the entire household used to go on red alert as soon as Antu said "SOO-SOO" and run to take her to the bathroom. Then it became, "wait a sec!" and then take her to the bathroom. Soon it was, "So? Go!" and poor thing started to pull the step stool closer, put the potty seat on top of the toilet, climb up, use the bathroom, etc... all on her own! Now she has even stopped telling us! I got up today morning to see her sitting on the pot and coolly reading a bath book!! And yesterday Ashu told her, "Let me use it first. You wait in line!" and she patiently did! How the times have changed!

Ashu has also successfully completed Level 1 of Skiing and is confidently skiing the beginner slopes(Level 2) using the ski lift and all! Best decision ever to put her and S, a friends daughter in a private class and taking them to the slopes every weekend regularly since January. The girls enjoyed each others company, had fun skiing and enjoyed the whole experience. And we feel we had a productive winter too! She has also taken to her brand new Skateboard with a vengeance. It has been sleeping in the cupboard for a year. A gift from my sister for her 5th birthday on her request. Shes growing up too fast for me and talking the talk and walking the walk! "You know what a ramp is Amma? You don't? Its an inclined plane!!", she told me yesterday! *gulp* I know I have always been telling her, "Use your words, Ashu! Use your words!" for everything! But the other day she did and how! Antu kept on kicking her under the table when they were eating dinner. Ashu told her to stop repeatedly but Antu would nt listen. So she says, "Whats the point, Antu? Why are you kicking me? Whats the point?" I swear I choked on my tea!

By the Water Cooler.

I think Parul times her book release to coincide with my India trip! :) Just like last time, I bought her second book, By the Water Cooler, at the Landmark in Chennai. But this time I could nt find them in the shelves and had to ask the staff and the guy brought me a copy! hmph. How rude! But it was fun searching for "Sharma" in the shelves and telling the guy "Parul NOT Poonam Sharma" and giving him a look as if hes from Mars! Even though I could nt wait to read the book, I could nt begin to read it before I finished the other books in my waiting list thanks to my OCD. Especially since they were by a certain Stieg Larson.

I started reading the book in a nervous state. Will I like the book or wont I? If I dont like it, should I be honest in my blog review? But how can I lie to my BFF[citation needed]? This is the problem reading books written by people you know. (In my case, the grand total is just ONE - Parul.) But I need not have worried. Its a total fun read just like her blog. A very fast moving book and thats saying something in my case. Because if I get stuck in a book, it takes quite a long time for me to continue that book again. Which means I dont read any other book. Which means Im blog hopping like crazy! Phew. You saved me there, P!

I was in awe of Parul through out the book. Almost every line I read made me go, "How did she think of that?"

All the antics by Tanya planning her wedding right in the office were just hilarious. Genius idea, that!

I LOVED Tanya more than Mini. There, I said it!

I liked how Mini never quit. And a little jealous too.

I was picturing Paruls face for Mini, Deepika Padukone(!) for Anuradha Menon, that manager guy in the Rocket Singh movie as Avinash, an ex colleague of mine for Varun, etc... I could nt picture anyone I know as Shipra because I dont know anyone who would fit the name "Lardie" perfectly! Except for one person whose name begins with B, ends with an O and has another O in the middle! *ahem* Anyway, so now you know whom to cast when the book becomes a movie, right Parul? :)

Everyday Math.

I have been going crazy trying to teach Addition and Subtraction to Ashu. It takes talent to teach a kid something as basic as 2+2 = 4, I tell you. And I sorely lack that talent. She is getting better though after a month of me sitting on her head. Though the ride has not been smooth, it has been quite comical. Like when I ask her whats 15 + 4, she ll do some calculations in her head and answer "11"! And Im like "Dude! how can you add two numbers and then get a lesser number?" But of course she ll give me a blank look like her father does when I explain to him the method of loading the dishwasher. For the 100th time! And then she ll start guessing, "Is it 15 then? Or 17?" And when shes in one of those annoyingly silly moods, "Is the answer fifteen hundred and twenty, Amma? Or a Trillion and one?" Sigh! One day she wrote 9 + 9 = 19. I was nt even sitting with her or anything. She was playing with stencils and using the number stencils, wrote this in a paper. And many other sums. All of them were right except this one. I winced. Told her as gently as possible that she has done a very good job except this one. And thats it! She exploded! "I hate maths, Amma and I hate you! Im never ever doing addition again! 9 plus 9 is 19! You dont know anything!" and stomped off. I gave her the royal ignore. A few minutes later she walks to me and asks gently, "What is 9 + 9, Amma?" Phew. At least she is interested!

A few weeks back she was asking me when her Easter break was and I told her its in April. "Thats a long time away, Amma! Its only February now", she sighed! I told her that its only a month and a half away and that February is a short month with only 28 days instead of 30 and it will fly. "But thats only like 2 days less, Amma! Thats not a lot!", she responded! I was stunned needless to say!

As if all this drama with Ashu is not enough, Antu for her part shocked me the other day. So theres this shop (Migros) which gives out a small toy called "Nano" every time we buy something for 20 francs. Collecting them is the current craze amongst kids here. I dont shop there a lot much to Ashu's disappointment. So she had only two. The girls treasured them like gold and played with them all the time. Then a couple of days back, Antu and I went to Migros to buy groceries and got two more of them. I gave them to Antu and as soon as she saw them she screamed, "Nano!! Ippa namba kitta four irukku!" (Now we have four!) I refused to believe my ears. The girl can count, yes. But adding?! That too instantly! I think its time I ask Antu to teach Maths to her sister!

The Fungle.

This is a fun website for kids. Ashu and I explored the beta version of The Fungle together a couple of days back and as expected, the kid is hooked. As a beginner reader, Ashu was nt able to read everything on her own and needed my help to navigate in the beginning. Then I left her alone with it and came back 10 minutes later to see her dressing up her avatar, listening to a story and then playing a game! But being the scaredy cat that she is, she asked me to help because she was afraid of the snake that appeared in the game! Its nice that the stories and books are read alongs since she can listen to them. And I like the fact that theres an option of switching off the read along for kids who can read.

And like I wrote to Narayanan, the CEO, the Bee Mail idea is pure genius. Ashu went to bed asking if she got a bee mail! :) We cant wait for the Fungle to go live.

Please check it out if you are interested.

Heres Utbt's review of The Fungle and a short interview with the CEO.

ps.

Cross posted at http://indianmommies.blogspot.com/2011/02/fungle.html

Malaysia Vasudevan, MMKR and my Mom.

A couple of days back, I was listening to "Vachaalum Vaikaama Ponaalum" song form Michael Madana Kama Rajan (MMKR) in my car and was giggling like crazy thinking about the picturization of this song. Ashu asked why I was laughing and I told her its a funny song and that I will show the song to her later. ( But soon forgot. ) I can never listen to this song without at least a smile in my face. God, what a movie! I cant event think about MMKR without going "bheem boy bheem boy" in my mind! And then yesterday when I learnt that Malaysia Vasudevan has passed away, it brought a lump in my throat. The same person who put a smile in my face every time I listened to his voice is no more. RIP, MV.

Im sure I have a screw loose up there somewhere to mention this song as one of my favorites when people all around me are going "Kodai kaala kaatre" and "Poongaatru thurumbumaa" but let me redeem myself by saying that "Vetti veru vaasam" is my epic favorite too.

This made me wonder what are the other Tamil songs which are really funnily picturized. And the first one which came to my mind was the one from Bale Paandiyaa - "Neeye unakku"! God, MR Radha's body language is hilarious! And the whole suspense of what will Sivaji do when he sees MR Radha is just edge of the seat funny. (on another note - how the hell did Sivaji lip sync with such perfection for this extremely difficult song? The mind boggles!) And the "Jambulingame" song from Kasethaan Kadavuladaa. Thengaai is just too good in this one.

And talking about funny songs, I have to mention that Nithyashree song from Jeans - "Kannodu". I know that its not really hilarious or anything but then you dont know my mom. So my mom. You know how we type "ROTFLOL" for everything these days. But are we actually Rolling On the Floor Laughing Out Loud? Most often, we are nt even smiling while typing it, are we? Lets just say that who ever coined ROTFLOL got the idea after seeing my mom go ROTFLOL for the Kannodu song. In the cinema theatre that too! One second my mom was sitting right next to me and the next, she was on the floor and I thought she had a heart attack or something! It was 1998. Sis was in the USA and my dad had better things to do so it was just my mom and me. And then I heard her laughing with tears in her eyes and everyone was looking and I was so embarrassed. Then she managed to get up and sit in her seat. But she laughed so loudly the entire duration of the song, slapped and pinched my thigh so hard when the skeleton dances at the end that I had tears in my eyes too. From the pain! God, it was all so embarrassing that I pretended I was not with her when the lights came on. I should have known better though. She has a history. All my cousins and uncles and aunts run a mile from my mom whenever any scene from MMKR comes on TV. "Ava pakkathula ukkaandhamo, sethom" (we will die in her hands if we sit near her!) can be heard from various parts of the household and Im not exaggerating here! So imagine watching MMKR the first time with her in the theatre. Sis, Dad and I kept switching seats because our legs were getting sore!! "anga joke varudho illayo, unga amma kai namba kaal kitta varudha varudhaa nnu paakardhuke time sariyaa irundhadhu! padatha yaaru paatha?" - this was my dad after the movie!! (who had the time to see the movie when I had to watch out for your mom?) Play any of the Thiruppu-Kameshwaran scene to my mom if you want proof. But if theres Delhi Ganesh or Thiruttu Paati in that scene too, then watch it with her at your own risk!

I am just like her too but a bit more restrained after seeing family members run from her! I am always the one who laughs the loudest in any group. We watched Quick Gun Murugan last week with some friends and man! It was awesome! What a brilliant spoof! It was so wonderfully funny that I was truly ROTFLOL. But then I watched it sitting on the floor, so it did nt look quite as bad as my mom! :)

ps.

Can someone settle this for me once for all? Who sang the "Nila Kaayudhu" song from Sakalakala Vallavan? SPB or Malaysia? The song is credited to SPB but it totally sounds like Malaysia and I ve been thinking it was indeed him until a few years ago when my sis raised this doubt. It has been nagging me ever since. "Kattavandi" is credited to MV, "nethu raathri amma" is credited to SPB. So why not this song to MV? But if it was indeed SPB why did he sing it so different from his own voice? Discuss.

Breaking the break.

Things have been crazy in Boodom. The sick fest began in Jan and I just realized the whole family has been falling sick every January like clock work. I think I ll take some flu shots next year. I mention only me here because its the Universal truth that the whole world and its neighbor can get sick but a MOTHER never ever can fall ill! Its a recipe for disaster especially when she has to drop two kids in school! It all started with Ashu burning with fever one sunday and then bunking school the next 4 days. Antu fell sick somewhere around Day 3 and I caught it on Day 5. One day it was Thursday and the next thing I know, it was Monday morning! I have no idea how the three days in between flew by. It was one of the worst days in my life! Even though I was out of fever on Monday, it took me 5 more days to come back to normal. Phew! Just writing about it is giving me the jitters. Thank God for the husband. I would have killed myself otherwise. February has been kind to us so far. Ashu's school is closed for ski break and we are as usual busier then school days. BFF and I are taking our respective girls for ski lessons through the week and we want to be put in a pedestal and given a medal for this brave endeavor but no one is biting. hmph!

I wanted to write so much and every time I had something interesting to share, I wrote down a few words in a notepad so that I can blog them later. Now I have words like "Pacifier, Ashu- big sis, Eraser(!), Memory, Phone call", etc... but for the life of me, I cant remember what I wanted to say! You guys lucked out, I guess! :)

Talking of phone call - why the hell cant I bring myself to say "Im busy right now. Can I call you later?" to anyone? I just cant! Im taking Kid 1 out of the bath with the phone stuck between my ear and shoulder and in excruciating pain but I cant tell the person, "hold on for a minute!" Its not like I dont try. But I just am not able to find the right pause to say that! It always seems like the wrong time to say, "I ll call you later!" This one time, Antu even fell down from the sofa and bumped her head and was howling and I ran to the other room so that whatever the caller was saying did nt get interrupted!!! (yes, yes. Hd took care of her! But the fact remains that I did nt care!) I can NOT multi task while on my phone. My sister even uses her mixer while talking to me. But I sit on the sofa or lie on the bed or walk here and there at the most. I hate using call waiting and while Im on the cordless, I dont pick up the cellphone if it rings! Even if its from God himself!! If its Hd, I pick up and keep on talking on the other phone, so he hangs up very irritated. I swat the kids away like mosquitoes if they come near me while Im on the phone. As if Im living a secret life and if the caller finds out I have kids, he or she will terminate me from the secret mission or something! While in fact the caller most of the time is a fellow mom! I think I will die of stress if I ever work from home and have to take calls! And in the rare cases that I do initiate to end the call, Im apologetic to the point of embarrassment! argh! Im such a doofus! How hard is it going to be to say, "Im potty training Antu. And she just had an accident and sprayed the whole playroom including her toy laptop, piano, guitar, a picture dictionary book and a coloring book which is totally drenched and which I mostly have to throw in the trash and make sure Ashu never ever finds out. And to make matters worse, she thinks she has to clean the mess and is "mopping" the floor with a facial tissue! Can I call you later? Like once shes in college?"

Madras Musings.

Ashu and I went to the Bombay Jayashree concert at the Krishna Gana Sabha. Fil had front row tickets and was begging us to go. I knew it was a bad idea to go with Antu. So Hd decided to stay home with her. Ashu was thrilled but after 45 minutes, she went to sleep. I had a wonderful time listening to Jayashree. Live. Wow! My first Margazhi Kacheri. Unforgettable experience.

Hd and I managed to watch Kamal Haasan's recent movie "Manmadhan Ambu". Was a pleasant watch but the last 30 minutes were horrible. I was squirming in my seat especially since we had a train to catch in a couple of hours and I was kicking myself that I decided to watch the movie instead of hanging around with my parents and saying teary goodbyes! We also watched Mynaa a couple of days earlier in the same awful theatre and loved it. The songs were wonderful. The performances were flawless. I felt the tragic end was so unnecessary but then it would have been an ordinary movie otherwise, I suppose. "Mynaa, Mynaa" is the current favorite song on non stop loop.

I listened to this particular SPB song many times on FM Radio whenever I was in the car. I had no idea what song it was or which movie it was from. After coming back to Zurich, I was you tubing the songs from Aadukalam and thats when I realized it was the "Ayyayo" song. And what a song! Sigh!

Talking about movies, let me list all the movies I watched on the plane while going and coming back.

Teen Patti (hated the end. Also I had watched 21. So was nt impressed)

Anjaana Anjaani (horrible)

I hate luv stories (was OK)

Udaan (brilliant movie. loved it)

Megamind (absolutely awesome. Must watch)

Thiru thiru thuru thuru (Tamil comedy. Was time pass)

Once upon a time in Mumbai (was good)

Can you believe that I'm now in a stage where I can watch movies on the plane instead of juggling two food trays in one hand while making a kid sleep in my shoulder and at the same time reading a book to another? I never thought I will get here. But I did. Yahooooooo!! Or may be it was because Hd was also flying with us and that there was Dora in the kids channel! Whatever! I am not complaining.

Shopping is such an exhausting experience in Madras. Uff. Especially being the Christmas/New year/Pongal season, there were oceans of people in every shop and theres no way I could take the girls if I wanted any shopping done. We stayed clear of Pondy Bazaar and Panagal Park after this one trip to a Jewellery shop to buy Golusu (silver anklets) for Ashu where Antu tried on a heavy gold necklace and tried to make a run for it!!

And whats with all the anti piracy laws when I see a shop right in the middle of a busy road selling DVDs of every recent movie? I mean he was selling "Tees Maar Khan" and I think it got released like half a day earlier!! I was trying to find some DVDs to teach Tamil alphabets for Ashu and the guy was asking if I wanted "Eesan"! I said no and the guy says "Neenga naalaiku varuveenga, Akka!"* to which I replied, "Naan varradhu irukkattum. neenga iruppeengalaa?"** and he laughs!

*You will come back tomorrow, Madam.

** But will YOU be here?

Hd and I managed to go out for one meal without the kids while in Madras at the new Japanese restaurant called Teppan at the Benjarong. Being vegetarians, we have never tried Japanese food before and if not in Madras then where else? The 9 course meal was just a fantastic experience. The main course was cooked right in front of us and the whole set up has been so thoughtfully designed. Another interesting restaurant we went to is Rasa. I fell in love with the menu when I saw "Thulasi Vadai" and "Nellikkaai Soup!" Yum yum yum yum Delicioso!

It was lovely to meet Itchy and the boys again. I was so jealous seeing Mr.Itchy's paintings on the walls. Immensely talented. The twins and my girls had their proper first playdate and it was a relief when the four of them kept themselves busy leaving Itchy and me to gossip! (I swear we did nt talk about you! ;) We managed to go out for a dinner too along with the whole jing bang family and it was such fun. I think I talked too much though. Did I even let you talk, Itchy?

I'm sure not all women do this. But I have this annoying habit of wearing some old salwar suits I keep in the cupboards in Madras every time I visit. I don't know whats in fashion and whats not and for the past so many years, its the same old faded green salwar kameez and the pale pink churidar kurta I wear, at least for the first few days before I go on a shopping binge. So theres quite a possibility that I might be mistaken for a maid! This one time a shop keeper refused to show me a box of hair clips because they were expensive and out of my range! ("Adhu ellam fifty rupees, madam!") You think I would be hurt? Nah!

You know what hurts me though? The clothing sizes! Whats up with them? I think someone up there seriously hates me. Let me tell you that it takes immense courage to even ask a salesperson to show you XL sized kurtas. And then you go to the trial room and try it and it does nt even fit you! And you are so mad and hate the whole world and come out cursing only to see the salesperson standing outside and asking you, "Shall I pack this, Madam?" Argh! I wish they built trial rooms with emergency exits! If this is nt an emergency...

And this one time I get inside an accessory shop and ask for glass bangles and the guy says "unga size illai, madam!"* I told him, "Kai la dhaanga pottuka poren, neenga kaattunga!"** Bloody hell!

*we don't have them in your size, madam.

** The bangles are for my wrists. So show them!

Madras is growing on me. While I was a staunch Anti-Madras at one point of time, it seems like every Madras trip is making me like the place a wee bit more than the previous time. I told the husband, "I cant wait to hit forty and become a true blue Madras Maami" much to his utter shock!

Long Live Grandpas!

I read MM's recent post and could nt stop grinning. Grandpas surely rock and its the same in this household where the girls think their Thatha is the best thing that happened to them after gummy bears! The girls don't even acknowledge my existence when Thatha is around. The only lap both of them fight for is their Thatha's. Ashu who is so restrained when it comes to showing her affection screamed a high pitch shriek and ran to my dad when she heard his voice at the door in Madras. She hugged him and held on to him like a lizard on the wall for five whole minutes! He is the one who tells them stories of his trademark "Singaaram Bingaaram". For hours. On the phone! No wonder Ashu says that he loves her Thatha the most in the whole wide world!

I know I'm being a total copycat but Im sure MM wont mind if I post the below photos. I have to because of the striking similarity. I swear they were nt photo shopped! :)

What did Ashu do in India?

Dont ask what a step ladder is doing in the middle of the living room? My wish is my grandpa's command!

In Mahabalipuram. Can you spot me?

In the crocodile park. I read that the crocodiles can jump. Is there one behind me? Tell me NOW.

I did nt succeed. But I did try climbing!

At the swimming pool in the resort we stayed in Cochin. Any chance to climb, I will!

A titanic moment in the house boat.

Feeding the fish from a wooden bridge in the resort at Kumarakom.

Holding onto my dear life! This was my grandma's idea of fun!

Now this is my idea of heaven!

For once, Im jumping in instead of climbing!

Who said an Oonjal cant be used as a jungle gym?

Climbing up to see what a water tank is!

Sitting on a terrace wall and wondering why theres no "maadi" in Zurich!

ps.

I was going through our India trip photos and was surprised that theres a pattern when it came to Ashu's photos. She truly "monkeyed" around a lot. I swear all the photos were taken in a span of 3 weeks and I had no idea that there was a theme going! ;)

Another one flies the coop.

Today was Antu's first day at play school. I was in tears in the morning. I felt pathetic for being so upset. God only knows how my mom let us go live in hostels and then let us get married! I dont remember being so upset when Ashu started school because she cried so much and took so much time to settle down that I had no time to think about my feelings. But Antu has been so excited and talking about this school non stop the last one month. "I am going to play school. My friend D is there.", she has repeating this a million times to anyone who would listen. After loads of deliberation, we as usual settled on a English speaking play school because of the comfort factor. And Antu will be starting two days a week to begin with. After dropping Ashu, Hd and I drove with Antu to her new school. We went in and I changed Antus shoes and she walked in. I was talking to the care givers for a few minutes, took a few pics and said bye to Antu. She waved to me and her dad and continued playing in the toy kitchen. I drove home and wondered about the point of my life staring at blank walls! One of the teachers called at 10.15 am to let me know that alls well and Antu is having fun. I cant believe Hd did nt think to hide the kitchen knives today!

So that Antu does nt feel bad, Im doing the same style of update as I did for Ashu.

What was playing in the car?

Antu's favorite "Kangal Irandaal". Hd switched on the music and this song started playing. We reached the school just when the song ended.

What was Antu wearing?

Ashu's old pants and a new full sleeve cream color top her dad bought her from London. Ashu's old sneakers and pink jacket.

What was she most excited about?

That she was going to "school" and that she is going to see D there.

What did she eat?

Milk, toast and quark at home for breakfast.

What was in her snack box?

The school gave her snacks. She said she ate bread and black colour nut!

Where is she schooling? Why this school?

Oooh! My chance to say that she's schooling in Switzerland! :) Its a small and sweet play school which is nearby and recommended by many friends.

How is Antu taking to School?

Like how I take to Jalapeno Poppers! Err.. like duck to water, I meant to say!

The day before first day of school.

It was a Sunday. Antu could nt understand "tomorrow" and insisted she wanted to go to school "now"!

The one thing that was more difficult than picking out the school itself.

Sigh! Dropping Antu and coming back to an empty house.

What I found most disturbing?

I called my mom after coming home and she did nt say "there! there!". Instead lectured me how to use my time when Antu is away! Cruella de Vil would have been more sympathetic, I tell you! hmph! Thankfully, my dad knew exactly how I felt and told me what a big mistake I have made by sending Antu to school. That felt good. :)

I picked up Antu at noon and she happily said bye to everyone, wore her shoes and followed me. This one just exists to break my heart. One tiny piece at a time.

Yathaa Sthaanam.

Sanskrit for "in its own place". I love the word. It fits us gypsies perfectly.

So much happened the past 4 weeks and I have duly forgotten what I wanted to write in the chaos of the past 2 days trying to settle into our routine. Its tough when the house is like an igloo and the daily chores beckon.

I remember this one incident which happened in Madras and I ll leave you with that. So we were coming back form Mahabalipuram and Hd wanted to get a cup of coffee and we stopped at the Cafe Coffee Day. We waited in the car while he went in. Ashu who is an avid reader these days read the name.

"Coffee coffee day? Thats funny!"

"Read whats written below, Ashu".

"A lot can happen over coffee?"

"Good Job."

"But what does it mean, Amma? What can happen?"

As always I gave my ready response. "You tell me, Ashu. Take a guess."

"Hmmm... The coffee can spill. Or the cup can break."

"ha ha ha"

"Am I right?"

"Absolutely!"

Zurich to Chennai to Kumbakonam to Coimbatore to Kumarakom.

And we still have two more weeks to go. Wonderful time is being had, needless to say. Though we had no plans for an India trip this December, it so happened that an official trip came up for Hd and we decided to tag along at the last minute. Convinced myself its only Kindergarten and made Ashu skip school from 1st of December. Though she was most reluctant to miss the school xmas party, the winter concert and Sami Claus visit, everything flew out of the window once she landed here and now she says she wants to go to school here and never wants to go back to Zurich! *gulp*

We were off to Kerala with my parents for 5 days. The resort in Kumarakom was wonderful and staying a day and night in the house boat was the highlight of the trip though keeping Antu alive in that most child-unfriendly house boat was another issue! Ashu saw uniform clad kids using the boat to go to school and was super thrilled. We visited the Guruvayoor temple on the last day on our way back to Coimbatore. It was quite an experience too what with standing in line for 2 1/2 hours to see Lord Krishna for 2 seconds! We saw a short Kathakali performance in Cochin and Ashu loved it. She was enthralled by the whole experience.

Good time is being had at porandha veedu right now what with my mother trying to potty train Antu, Ashus friends taking time in spite of half yearly exams to play with her, Hd happily munching on home made murukku and sipping filter coffee while I surf tv channels from 1 to 80 again and again and again not watching one program for more than 5 mins! Hd is not amused when I tell him that I don't want to come back to Zurich ever again either. He can be such a party pooper sometimes. :)

The Girl with the Purple Glasses.

I dont know if its a milestone or not but the big news is that Ashu is wearing glasses. So a little more than a month ago, I took her to the eye doctor. Somewhere around June, Hd and I felt that her eyes need to be checked. We both are short sighted and thought that the sooner she gets checked the better. She did nt show any signs though. Nothing we noticed, that is. We got an appointment only in October. One part of me was cool about it and another part of course was a little apprehensive. The retinal dilation drops were given three times and the test was in the evening, Ashu was too tired. And it was a horrible experience for me trying to make Ashu cooperate and get it over with rather than come another day and go through the same thing once again. The doctor and the nurse were extremely patient with her. She was tested and the doc confirmed that she needs glasses. I remember I was 12 when I was tested and I was over the moon that I can wear glasses because they were cool. My parents and sister are nt short sighted so I felt really special. Thankfully, kids are still the same and Ashu was thrilled that she can wear glasses. One of her friends from school wears glasses and two more boys we know wear them too. And of course she sees me and her dad with glasses almost all the time. So thankfully she was ok with the idea.

A week later, we were off to this big Optical shop in Bahnhofstrasse. A kind saleslady guided us and Ashu was treated like a princess. She showed us the frames and after trying a dozen of them, Ashu selected a purple one. It looked nice on her, I thought. We ordered the glasses and walked out with a balloon! And a week later, ta-da! Ashus first pair of glasses arrived! I spoke to her class teacher about it and she told me that she will have a talk with the class about it. Ashu skipped to school that day and came back even more happier! Phew. It has been a month now and she wears them regularly. She is very careful with them too. She takes it off carefully and puts it on top of the drawer before falling on the bed face first! Even when she's upset about something! Thats more than what can be said of her mother! It helps that she is like her father in some things, huh? :) Here she is happily drawing with the window glass crayons! Best thing I ever bought, I tell you! Madam was upset that I would nt hang a Happy Birthday banner for her fathers birthday so she took it upon herself to decorate. :) On that note, Happy Birthday Husband Dear!

ps.

I ll be on a short blog break. See you on the other side.