"People who create their own drama deserve their own Karma".

What goes around, comes around! Nothing makes you believe in Karma like when one becomes a parent! Today around 2 pm, Ashu gets a call from her friend, Az asking if she wants to go to the pool with her. Ashu looks at me and I nod my head and she excitedly says yes to her friend, packs her bag and leaves the house. To the pool which is 5 mins walk from our house. At least thats where I assumed they were going and thats what Ashu told me as well. Cut to 5.30 pm - no sign of Ashu. At 6 pm, I am worried. Hd who was watching Nadal making history was worried enough to take his eyes off the TV and look at me. He then walked to the pool to see if she was there or in the nearby park but the pool was closed already and no one in the park. Then I started calling Az's home number, her parents mobile number but no answer. So I walk to Az's house which is 2 mins walk from our house. No ones home. I call three more of Ashus friends who are all in the neighborhood asking if they know where Az and Ashu went but no one knows. At 7.30 pm, my sister calls and asks if Ashu is home because I told her at 5.30 that she's not home yet. Now she's worried too! I knew Ashu would be fine and she would come home soon and safe but the not knowing where she was, was driving me crazy. And the fact that the girl did not think to call from her friends moms phone and tell me where she is and when she will be coming back. Not to mention the guilt trips I was taking. "I am an irresponsible parent! I should have checked with Az's mother. I should have told Ashu to call me if theres any change. " sigh. Anyway, Ashu got back at 8 pm. She had gone to another pool which is a 10 minutes drive away.  "I did nt know you will be worried, Amma. I was having so much fun that I did nt know it got so late. I did nt have my watch." Simple. And she got so upset that we were all worried for her. Sigh. 

The entire 2 hours when I was worried and looking out of the window every 5 minutes, there was only one thing I was thinking about. My Thatha. My Paternal Grandfather. I was 20 years old and in college. Usually I would be home around 5 pm. But on the day I would come late, I would find him standing outside the house, near the gate looking into the direction I would come from. If it was after 6.30 pm, then I can bet on my life that he would be standing there waiting for me. Sandhikaalam (dusk) was the curfew time according to him and in the morning when I left home, he would say "sandhikaalathukulla vandhudu" (Come back before dusk) and that was his way of saying good bye. Even when my parents did nt care, I knew Thatha would be waiting for me. And the most interesting part is that when I arrived late, he would see me and smile and walk back inside without asking me even a single question. I do not think I made him wait every other day but I do remember that in a span of 18 months, at least once a week I would momentarily forget about him because I was busy talking to the boys (what else!!) and would get home late and there I would see him in his white veshti and a mel thundu, waiting near the gate. And I don't remember he ever asking me why I was late. Not even once. And the next day, he would see me off with his usual send off. 

In those 2 hours, I was thinking about Thatha and his unconditional love and support and how patient he was with me and wowed to be the same way with Ashu. You give your child all the freedom they need and hope they are responsible with it. Thats all one can expect. And after all the careful planning on what to tell her and how to handle myself, I failed miserably! Guess one has to be a grandparent to achieve that kind of Zenness and a mere parent just won't do. In other words, Thatha did not slap me in my face because he knew Karma would! 

Ski Break!

Just when I was thinking I should write a post about how much I am enjoying skiing this year, I went ahead and broke my leg! Never a dull moment in my life, I tell you. Long story short - multiple ligament tear and meniscus tear in my right knee! *bangs head* This happened last Saturday when Ashu and I were skiing at Hoch Ybrig in a glorious weather! Two more families were with us and it was all fun in the morning until I fell down. The damage to the knee was not due to the fall but the way I rotated my knee. Hoped it was a bad sprain and tried to be in denial. But on Sunday morning, I could nt put my leg down.

Sunday - Hospital, X ray, kids at a friends house, dinner sent by the friend. A huge cast. (removable, thankfully) No fracture. Crutches!

Monday - MRI in the evening.

Tuesday - MRI reports. Ligament tear in two places and a meniscus tear. Physiotherapy suggested for now. Friend sends lunch. Cousin (college going girl!) comes home to help.

Wednesday - Hd drops the kids, drops me for physio, picks me up later and then goes to office. Cousin picks up Antu, makes lunch. Hd picks up Ashu and comes home. Cousin leaves after dinner.

Thursday - Hd holds fort. A friend picks up Ashu in the evening and drops her home. Friends visit. No horlicks bottle or mosambis!

Friday - Physiotherapy again. Hd holds fort. Cousin comes in the evening. I get a new Knee brace to wear during the day.

Saturday - Hd takes Ashu to a birthday party. Cousin and he make lunch. A friend sends dinner. Cousin leaves.

Sunday - Hd makes lunch/dinner. Takes Ashu skiing.

Monday - Hd drops the kids, makes lunch, picks up Antu at noon, works from home a bit and now off to pick up Ashu and then directly to the airport to pick up my SISTER!

Oh God! This was one of the toughest weeks in my life. Seeing Hd running around like a headless chicken and not able to help hurt more than my torn knee! God knows what I would have done if he had nt pulled through! And some dear friends and not to mention my little cousin! Sigh! I owe them big! Ashu too. She is an awesome helper. Fetching me stuff a million times and taking care of me. At one point, she hung a bag around my neck and put the phones, remotes, book, ipad, etc... and asked me to carry it everywhere! Guess she got tired picking up the phone! Antu is more keen on stealing my crutch though!

My mom will come as soon as she gets her visa. Sis decided to come and help until mom arrives. Family is a family for a reason, I guess. Me - I am just hoping that physiotherapy works and I would nt need surgery! And why oh why the right knee? Does nt the Universe know that we are screwed if I don't drive?

A Milestone I dreaded: The F Word.

Loads of friends have told me how their kids said the F word, how shocked they were, how the kids wanted to know the meaning of the word, how they were stumped, etc.. etc... etc... I kind of worried too but Ashu is a kind of kid who instinctively seems to know what will make me happy or upset and she ll avoid asking anything which she thinks will upset me or get her into trouble. Not always, I can assure. But mostly. So I knew I had a long time before I had to face that kind of a situation. But then, one can only dream!

Ashus best friend, G had come home today for lunch and we were all eating at the table. Antu with her "impeccable" table manners had to say "yuck" for God knows what and G immediately gasped, "Oh my God! Antu just said the F word!" I froze. "Its a bad word!", G added! I was speechless. I looked at Ashu who was looking at G curiously! "She said "yuck", G!", I mumbled. "Really? Do you know what the F word is?", she asked. "Forget me. How do YOU know?", I managed to ask. "Oh my sister told me. It is F***! Its a very bad word and we should never say it!". Very clear! "Thats right! Lets not say it then. Why don't we talk about butterflies? Or fairies? or Rainbows?" The girls started giggling and the situation was diffused. Phew.

Was that the end? Of course not. Come bedtime, Ashu asked me the dreaded question. "What is the meaning of the F word, Amma?" Sigh!

"Have you heard the word before, Ashu?"

Quite a defensive "No!"

"Its just a bad word, Ashu. And you will get into a lot of trouble if your teachers hear you say that, ok?"

"Is it a bad word like Stupid?"

"Its much, much worser that stupid."

"Is it a bad word like sissy?"

"What the F***!" (Ok, I did nt say that! But really!)

"Excuse me? Where do you hear words like these? Dont you guys have classes to attend while in school?"

"I heard it in recess, Amma! A called B a sissy because he said he likes pink!"

"Ok, Ashu! Thats another word you cant use, ok? Thats all Im saying!"

"I ll never use it Amma. I just want to know the meaning."

"We ll talk about it when you are a bit older, Ashu! How about two stories today, huh? Once upon a time..."

Im so making Hd handle it when its Antus turn. Which might even be tomorrow for all you know!

Breaking the break.

Things have been crazy in Boodom. The sick fest began in Jan and I just realized the whole family has been falling sick every January like clock work. I think I ll take some flu shots next year. I mention only me here because its the Universal truth that the whole world and its neighbor can get sick but a MOTHER never ever can fall ill! Its a recipe for disaster especially when she has to drop two kids in school! It all started with Ashu burning with fever one sunday and then bunking school the next 4 days. Antu fell sick somewhere around Day 3 and I caught it on Day 5. One day it was Thursday and the next thing I know, it was Monday morning! I have no idea how the three days in between flew by. It was one of the worst days in my life! Even though I was out of fever on Monday, it took me 5 more days to come back to normal. Phew! Just writing about it is giving me the jitters. Thank God for the husband. I would have killed myself otherwise. February has been kind to us so far. Ashu's school is closed for ski break and we are as usual busier then school days. BFF and I are taking our respective girls for ski lessons through the week and we want to be put in a pedestal and given a medal for this brave endeavor but no one is biting. hmph!

I wanted to write so much and every time I had something interesting to share, I wrote down a few words in a notepad so that I can blog them later. Now I have words like "Pacifier, Ashu- big sis, Eraser(!), Memory, Phone call", etc... but for the life of me, I cant remember what I wanted to say! You guys lucked out, I guess! :)

Talking of phone call - why the hell cant I bring myself to say "Im busy right now. Can I call you later?" to anyone? I just cant! Im taking Kid 1 out of the bath with the phone stuck between my ear and shoulder and in excruciating pain but I cant tell the person, "hold on for a minute!" Its not like I dont try. But I just am not able to find the right pause to say that! It always seems like the wrong time to say, "I ll call you later!" This one time, Antu even fell down from the sofa and bumped her head and was howling and I ran to the other room so that whatever the caller was saying did nt get interrupted!!! (yes, yes. Hd took care of her! But the fact remains that I did nt care!) I can NOT multi task while on my phone. My sister even uses her mixer while talking to me. But I sit on the sofa or lie on the bed or walk here and there at the most. I hate using call waiting and while Im on the cordless, I dont pick up the cellphone if it rings! Even if its from God himself!! If its Hd, I pick up and keep on talking on the other phone, so he hangs up very irritated. I swat the kids away like mosquitoes if they come near me while Im on the phone. As if Im living a secret life and if the caller finds out I have kids, he or she will terminate me from the secret mission or something! While in fact the caller most of the time is a fellow mom! I think I will die of stress if I ever work from home and have to take calls! And in the rare cases that I do initiate to end the call, Im apologetic to the point of embarrassment! argh! Im such a doofus! How hard is it going to be to say, "Im potty training Antu. And she just had an accident and sprayed the whole playroom including her toy laptop, piano, guitar, a picture dictionary book and a coloring book which is totally drenched and which I mostly have to throw in the trash and make sure Ashu never ever finds out. And to make matters worse, she thinks she has to clean the mess and is "mopping" the floor with a facial tissue! Can I call you later? Like once shes in college?"

What do you do all day long?

Thankfully I don't get the above question a lot. People are generally wary around me, I guess. But to answer that question, some days are so relaxing. The Sun is shining, the birds are chirping, Antu takes 3 hours naps and Ashu gets picked up by a friend after school and I have a relaxing, long day reading a book or surfing the net or watching TV. Amidst the housework, of course. And then there are other days. Like the day when I had to drop Ashu at 8.30 am, come back home, get myself and Antu ready, leave for the school again at 10 am for the assembly where Ashu and co were dancing, then come back home, get lunch for us both, clean up, then go back to school at 3 pm to pick up Ashu and her friend. Drive to a birthday party with them. Drop the kids off and get some groceries done. Go back and pick them up. Drop the other girl at her place. Come home and its already 7 pm. Get dinner ready, feed the kids, bed time routine, clean the house and then get something to eat for myself. And before I know its almost midnight and I'm still scrubbing the kitchen counter! I realize I ve spent most of the day driving! Its time I get a drivers uniform and call Ashu, "Madam", I guess!

And some other day when Antu has gymboree, Ashu has school, I have a lunch to go to, Hd is traveling, Ashu is bringing her friend to our house after school,... and its crazy fitting everything in one day and dragging Antu everywhere. But yesterday was the pits. Murphy would ve been really proud! So the morning went well. Ashu in school and Antu and I at home. Wednesdays are early finish for Ashu and usually Antu cant nap those days because I have to leave the house just before 2 pm. Even if she's asleep, I pick her up and by the time I get to the car, shes awake. Yesterday was the same. She had a late lunch and was in full form and not a little bit sleepy. Around 2 pm, we go to the school to pick up Ashu and her friend A who was coming home with us. So far so good. Around 3 pm, things start going downhill.

* Ashu is extremely tantrummy. Shes behaving very badly.

* Antu is a like a wrecking ball creating havoc where ever shes going and whatever shes touching.

* Poor A is clueless whats happening in this crazy household.

* I ask Antu to nap. She refuses.

* I ask Ashu to be nice to her friend and play with her. She refuses.

* I get snacks ready for the girls.

* Around 4.30 pm, I lose my patience and take Ashu to a room and yell at her so badly that shes howling.

* Antu meanwhile has made such a mess in one of the rooms that I take her aside and yell at her as well. Now shes howling too.

* Around 5 pm, I say enough is enough and get Ashu ready for the swim class which is at 5.30 pm. Pack up Antu and with A, get into the car. The idea is to drop A and then go the pool since the pool is very near A's house.
* The GPS does nt get started and I'm worried. I go in the general direction of the pool hoping the GPS will come alive in a while and lead us to A's house.

* Meanwhile Antu has fallen asleep! uh ho.

* We are almost near the pool and the GPS is still silent. I park the car on the curb and pray to all Gods. Thankfully, it comes alive. Phew.

*I drop A and rush to the pool. Its already 5.30 pm.

* Park the car, put the sleeping child in my shoulder, carry the bag and run inside with Ashu. 2 sets of stairs and 2 doors later, we are inside the dressing area. Ashu cooperates fully, changes and one more flight of stairs later, we are in the shower area. Ashu again showers by herself and I leave her with the teacher. Usually I hang around by the side while Antu plays in the kiddie pool since the class is only for 30 mins. But today I tell the teacher I ll be back and go back to the dressing rooms. The bench is not too comfy so I sit on the bottom most stair with Antu on my shoulder. Lets say I was only missing a disposable cup in front of me. Would ve made quite a bit of money if I had a cup since everyone who crossed gave a me a pity smile!!

* One of the class moms arrived in a while and said she ll bring Ashu to me after shes done. Long live her!

* I was playing carrot harvest in my phone. Could nt even call Hd since there was no network. and then the phone dies on me!!!! (Good move, Murphy!) And Im thinking to myself, "Ashu better give Michael Phelps a run for his money or else..."

* Ashu finishes her class, takes a shower and comes to me. We go to the dressing room and by this time Antu has opened her eyes but is cranky and crying. By this time, I cant feel my right hand because it has fallen off somewhere! I plonk her on the bench and help Ashu dry her hair and change her. Then I see that theres a door right next to the dressing area which directly goes to the car park. Hallelujah! Don't ve to struggle two flights of stairs. So we go out only to realize that I ve left the entry ticket card in the locker door itself! And these doors cannot be opened from outside. ARGH!

* 2 more flights of stairs again with a crying Antu and a whiny Ashu. I ask the receptionist if she can bring my card but she tells me I ve to go myself and gives me a temp card. At least I found the card. And I go back to give the temp card, thank her and walk out. Its already 6.30 pm and I have a farewell party to go to at 7.00 pm!

* You want me to stop now, don't you? Well I wanted it to stop too. But it did nt. So hear me out.

* As soon as I start the car, I see the tank is almost empty. I panic. Pray to all Gods and somehow reach the gas station near our house. I fill the tank, ask Ashu to wait in the car and that I ll be back in 2 minutes, lock the car and go inside to pay. Ashu can see me through the glass door. So can I. Of course, there have to be 4 people in front of me all buying their entire weeks groceries at a GAS STATION! I keep an eye out at the car and signal to Ashu. Then my turn comes and I pay. I come out to see that the car door is wide open and Ashu standing outside and she's crying! Right by the side of a busy road! I was so shocked that I go speechless for a second. There are a few people staring at the scene. I quickly bundle Ashu inside and ask what the heck does she think shes doing? She could nt see me when I was paying, got worried (because I was out of her sight for TWO SECONDS!), took off her seat belt, climbed to the drivers seat, unlocked the doors, opened the door, climbed outside, did nt know whether to leave Antu and come and get me so she started crying. Because she was scared! I banged my head against the wheel, told her how dangerous her move was which made her cry more, of course. Then hugged her and drove home.

* Hd was home. Murphy took pity on me, I guess. About time, I say! I quickly changed, gave the shorter version of my day to Hd and left the house to attend a school mom's farewell party. It was at a friends place and a dance party at that. "Munni badnaam hui" many times and for the first time in my life, I wished I drank!

So come on all you SAHMs. Tell me the worst day of your mommy life.(Leave a link or write in the comment section.) Parul had the By the Water Cooler contest for the working types. Let us have some fun too. May be I ll consider the working moms stories too if its really, really bad! ;) No prizes vrizes because I'm no celebrity author. But I got two shoulders you can cry on!

Whoever said that "Giving birth is the easiest part of Motherhood", show me your feet please. *does saashtaanga namaskaram*

Lake Como.

This was one of our lousiest vacations ever! It rained when we reached Bellagio, it rained for the next 2 days and it was bright and sunny on the day we left. If I could go back in time, I would ve broken a sadhir thengai at the nearby Pillayaar temple before we left. (Yes, Amma. I should nt have left at raahu kaalam, I know!)

Let me start at the beginning. Como is around 3 1/2 drive from Zurich. We reached in EIGHT hours. First, we missed a road because there was some road work going on and it was confusing. Had to go 15 kms to just take an U turn. Then just before the Gothard Tunnel(the 17 km, 3rd longest tunnel in the world), the traffic built up and we like smart cookies took an exit to go via another town. But due to snow, every pass was closed. Add another 2 hours for this. We had lunch at a cosy joint and joined the Gothard traffic again. Miraculously, there was no jam and we just zoomed past. I was driving by this time and once we entered Italy and people started changing lanes without indicators, I said no way and asked Hd to drive. If we are going to die, let it be in his hands. Then we drove in those winding narrow roads, reached Cadennabia and took the car ferry (12 euros! akramam!) to reach Bellagio. We drove in the cobble stoned narrow roads and reached our apartment hotel. Hd dropped us and found a parking spot nearby to park the car. We saw the car again only when we left Bellagio on the 4th day.

Bellagio is the prettiest place ever. It is situated at the tip separating the Y shaped Lake Como. Looks like we are entering the middle ages when we enter Bellagio. Steps and slopes everywhere. Not exactly stroller friendly. But one can manage. There was a Gelateria right opposite our hotel where I had the most amazing french vanilla and pistachio Gelato for dinner! The next day, it was cloudy and gloomy and so cold! Good we all had taken our jackets and woollens. Actually, the kids had them. Hd and I were shivering in our spring jackets. We left for Villa Menzi. A leisurely walk in the gardens. It was nice. We got back to the center again, had a late lunch in a lovely restaurant, ran back to the hotel in the rain. Passed the day by eating more gelato, watching Chicken Little movie in Italian.

On Sunday it rained non stop. But we said enough is enough, covered antus stroller with the rain cover, ashu was all hooded up, Hd too. I held an umbrella and we walked to the ferry point, bought tickets for Lenno to visit Villa Balbianello. We got down in Lenno and was told that it was a 5 mins walk to the villa. Happily, we walked in the rain in the direction of the villa only to be told that its only the entry point and we ve to walk 20 mins uphill from there to reach the entrance. There was a water taxi stand but there was nobody there and we were nt sure what to do. So we walked uphill. Antu slept off in her stroller and poor Hd pushed the stroller and walked. Ashu was all wet and tired and hungry and cranky but poor thing did nt complain much. We reached the entrance after 30 mins. I knew there was a compulsory guided tour for the villa but only if there were enough people. But thankfully, there were other idiots like us waiting in the villa. We bought the tickets. We were told that there was a tour at 12.25 and we can see the gardens until then. While Hd and Antu stood under a shade, Ashu and I went to explore. The views are just breathtaking. The garden is beautiful. The villas location is just out of the world. But the rain ruined everything for us! Hd remarked as soon as we entered the gardens that he thought the last scene in Casino Royale was shot here. I had no idea. But the guided tour later confirmed that fact! whaddayaknow? I should ask James Bond to tell my husband to buy milk the next time! May be he ll remember then! After a wonderful tour of the villa, we wisely took a water taxi right from the garden(10 euros but we did nt care this time!) to Lenno(5 mins boat ride) and then from there a ferry back to Bellagio. Hd bought some pizza and we ate in our room because Ashu said she did nt want to go anywhere anymore! We ate more Gelato and watched Toy Story 2 , Stuart Little 1 and Stuart Little 2. All in Italian.

The next day was bright and sunny. But we had to leave. We took the car ferry back to Cadennabia and since Villa Carlotta was just few minutes away, we drove there. But there was not one parking spot for miles. We should ve come by the ferry to visit the villa, gone back and then should have drove our car. But we made a mistake. So waved to the villa from the outside, ate lunch in a very lousy restaurant in the middle of nowhere and drove back to Zurich. We reached in four hours. Hd is confident that we ll go back to visit Como in Summer. But I think Ashu is scarred for life. I asked her what was her favorite thing about the trip and she said, "nothing, amma"! And this is the girl who loves going on trips. Antu clearly is happy to be home too because yesterday I was taking the girls to the park in the evening and was getting ready and Antu said, "bye amma" and closed the door on me. She was still inside! As for me, I ll go back for sure. Its worth it just for the cassata flavored Gelato! :)

Are nt conversations like this supposed to happen when she is in her teens?

Amma, I don't like you.
Its OK. You don't ve to like me.
I am not going to talk to you forever.
That's OK too.
You are not my friend anymore Amma.
OK.
Amma..
(interrupting) I don't want to hear one more word from you.
But...
I said ...
Can I say one thing, Amma?
WHAT?
I don't like you.
Fine.
Fine.

The Karmic connection between Saakku Pai and Ballet.

When I was in college, post grad, I used to take a bus or my bike(kinetic) to get there. Some days, my dad used to drop me in his car if he had some work in that area. So this one day, I was getting ready and he offered a ride. I accepted and we walked to the car. The scene that met me was unbelievable. You cant guess even if I give you a million years. Imagine! A 20 year old getting dropped by her dad to college. A car whose entire back is loaded with saakku pai (jute bags) filled with some stuff. My dads boss is sitting in the passenger seat. The office security guy in full uniform ,with a huge moustache to boot, is sitting in the back holding the saakku pais in place so that I ve room to sit at the back!!! I double backed and told my dad that I ll take my bike after all, I ve to go to a friends house after class. He gave me a look and said, "vandeela eru"! (Get in!) Not wanting to create a scene before his boss, I did,while cursing him under my breath. I mean, is he a Moron? Which self respecting girl will sit amidst saaku pai and get dropped in college? We made some small talk with the boss and neared my college.

As soon as the side gate of my college came to view, I screamed ,"Stop here, Appa. I ll go through this gate". But fate was nt on my side that day. "No no. You ve to walk a long way if you go via this gate. Let me take you to the main gate. Saar wants to see your college campus too", said the man! Why, God, why? What did I ever do to you? Was this because I made fun of Shanthi when she came to school one day with a shaved head when we were four? Or because I pulled Chitras legs since she and her 3 siblings came in a Maatu vandi(bullock cart) to school? Or was it because I sniggered at Gundamma Ratnamala who brought this huge tiffin carrier(It was anju adukku, for Gods sake!) for lunch? It had to be Karma coming to bite my behind!

So dad pulls inside the main gate. Oh yes, my secret crush is standing right near his bike talking to some friends. He had to be there, right? And some of my classmates too. Oh, goody! "Stop here, Appa", I say again trying hard not to yell. But no. the man does nt get a hint even if the said hint is dancing butt naked in front of his eyes with a huge neon sign! He stops the car at last, right in the middle of the parking area. All eyes are in the car. I try to open the door and wriggle out. But the security guy is faster and wanting to prove hes worthy of the pay check, gets down first and with his side of the door left wide open, comes running to my side and opens the door for me. As if the Maruthi 800 stuffed with saaku pai was nt enough, the security guy opens the door for me as well! If ever there was a time I prayed Mother Earth to swallow me whole, that was it! I just gave my best dirty look to my father and muttered, "You could nt have stopped at the side gate, could you?" and walked inside with my head bent. Nothing dreadful happened actually in college. At least nothing that lasted more than a couple of days. I could always count on Sharmila and her current new boy friend to take over any other news! But I remember the feeling of humiliation. Till this day. May be I over reacted, may be I was just shallow, may be I was just silly, but the embarrassment was true.

I relived this incident last week. But from this side of the fence. It happened when Ashu told me, "You dont have to come to school to help me get ready for the ballet class, Amma. I can do it myself." And if this simple statement can hurt me so much when in fact she said that because she believes shes a big girl now and can dress up herself, how much more will it hurt me when she starts getting embarrassed by me? Sigh! Refer to my Karma statement on Paragraph 2. Circle of life, my dears, Circle of life. Its vicious.

I can safely say Good Bye to that Mother Teresa Award.

The unthinkable happened today. So I drop Ashu at school, then go to do groceries with Fil and Antu. I finish shopping and come back to the car park, load the groceries in the car, take Antu from the trolley, strap her in the car seat and while Fil stands near the car, I go to keep the trolley back and to pay for the parking. I come back to find that the car is locked and Fil looking at me quizzically. Thats when I remember that I gave the care key to Antu when she was in the trolley. Oops! So little Miss is locked inside with the car key and Fil and I are locked out! The little monkey! (Of course its all Antus fault!) I swore a couple of times, Fil was completely stunned and did nt know what to do and asked me if I ve a spare car key in my handbag! Yeah right! I looked through the window to see if I can see the car key in Antus hands and may be she ll press it again and unlock the car? No such luck. So I ask for help from a guy who parked his car next to us. Is it possible to open the car, I ask him? He says he does nt have the tools and asks me where the key is! I again look at Antu munching on a bread and being quite happy with the situation. I can ask Fil to stand guard while I take a cab, go home and get the spare key but it will take at least 30 mins for me and I was nt even sure the spare key was at home. Hd usually carries it with him and today hes not even in town! And what will Antu do inside a locked car for 30 mins? At least she was safe strapped in the car seat, I tell myself.

Then I tell Fil that I ll go ask help from the store people and walk towards the elevator. I pass the line of trolleys on the way and something tells me to look inside the last cart. And whaddayaknow? The car key is there!! Can you believe this? I let out a silent scream, grabbed the car key and ran towards the car. Fil was so relieved. So Antu had dropped the key in the cart and when I went to put back the trolley, the key got struck in the part where the kids sit and when it got folded, it had pressed the car key and the car got locked. Can anything be more weirder than this? I sent a silent prayer upwards and drove home thanking my lucky stars. Thorough out this very long 5 minutes ordeal, I had only one thought in my mind. A single thought that tormented me. The only thought which saw me through. "Why? Why? Why? Why did this have to happen in front of the FIL?" Sigh! Now the whole Madras and its Athimber will know. Next time you hear from someone about the loony mom who locked her baby inside the car, yes its me!

One cant fight genes much, I guess.

Remember the quote in Friends when Rachel says, "Oh my God. I've become my father. I've been trying so hard not to become my mother, I didn't see this coming”? Its almost the same case for me. I was trying so hard not to become like my dad that I have become a deadly combo of both my mom and dad. Yesterday for the first time I called Ashu as Antu and she gave me a stern warning. "I'm not Antu, Amma. Don't call me Antu." Oh, man! Why am I having a Deja Vu?

Other things I say which I ve invountarily borrowed from my mom -

~ "I have only two hands. Cant you see?"

~ "I'm a human being, not a machine".(Funny when you say it in Tamil, manushi and machine rhyme!)

~ "If you can't help, at least don't trouble me". (ubayogamaa illennaalum, ubathravamaa illaama iru!)

~ "Kadangaari!" (literally means someone who owes you money. But its a common term to scold a child in Tamil.)

~ "If you keep doing like this, I ll just leave ok?" (Leave from the world actually but I keep that part open ended!!)

~ "What gall! Have nt sprouted three leaves and you talk this much?" (enna thimuru! mulaichu moonu ilai vidalai, enna pechu pesara?)

~ "If you talk like this, I ll leave once for all!" (and then mutter to myself because I cant bring myself to tell her yet - "afterwards you can cry Amma, Amma but I wont be there!") I know, I know! I'm a meanie!

~ "There are kids who are going hungry every day. Eat your food and don't waste it."

~ Rendum rendaappa, rendum keyandaappa! (Im baffled here for the translation. Literally means, "I ve two ladles and both of them are useless" and here the two ladles refer to Ashu & Antu!)

The most annoying thing my dad said which I'm repeating now:

"Ashu, everything has a lifetime. That zipper in the bag can be pulled up and down only like 100 times. If you unnecessarily keep doing it, it will stop working soon."
Replace zipper with light switch/TV remote/ballpoint pen/drawers/doors/windows/curtains/clips/fan/buttons,... and I use the same dialogue for everything!

*bangs head against the wall and then realizes that that's something her mom did too*

“To succeed in the world it is not enough to be stupid, you must also be well-mannered.”

He does something stupid. I tell him so. In trying to defend himself, he digs a deeper hole for himself. I yell and scream. He ignores me. I throw things. He walks away. In frustration, I rant to my mom. She asks me to be patient. Tells me not to yell and scream and throw things because its wrong. I yell at her. She tries to calm me down. Tells me that my temper has always been my worst enemy.

What about the person who started all this? He goes scot free. He gets sympathies. Hes patient incarnated. People think he puts up with me . Hes a saint. But hey, but what about the stupid thing he did? Its all forgiven because I threw things and that's pretty stupid too and how can I be so hyrpcritical and accuse him? The end.

ps.
my sis perhaps will take my side. But that's because shes biased. So no one will pay heed to her.