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Showing posts with label than vinai thannai sudum. Show all posts
Showing posts with label than vinai thannai sudum. Show all posts

June 08, 2014

"People who create their own drama deserve their own Karma".

What goes around, comes around! Nothing makes you believe in Karma like when one becomes a parent! Today around 2 pm, Ashu gets a call from her friend, Az asking if she wants to go to the pool with her. Ashu looks at me and I nod my head and she excitedly says yes to her friend, packs her bag and leaves the house. To the pool which is 5 mins walk from our house. At least thats where I assumed they were going and thats what Ashu told me as well. Cut to 5.30 pm - no sign of Ashu. At 6 pm, I am worried. Hd who was watching Nadal making history was worried enough to take his eyes off the TV and look at me. He then walked to the pool to see if she was there or in the nearby park but the pool was closed already and no one in the park. Then I started calling Az's home number, her parents mobile number but no answer. So I walk to Az's house which is 2 mins walk from our house. No ones home. I call three more of Ashus friends who are all in the neighborhood asking if they know where Az and Ashu went but no one knows. At 7.30 pm, my sister calls and asks if Ashu is home because I told her at 5.30 that she's not home yet. Now she's worried too! I knew Ashu would be fine and she would come home soon and safe but the not knowing where she was, was driving me crazy. And the fact that the girl did not think to call from her friends moms phone and tell me where she is and when she will be coming back. Not to mention the guilt trips I was taking. "I am an irresponsible parent! I should have checked with Az's mother. I should have told Ashu to call me if theres any change. " sigh. Anyway, Ashu got back at 8 pm. She had gone to another pool which is a 10 minutes drive away.  "I did nt know you will be worried, Amma. I was having so much fun that I did nt know it got so late. I did nt have my watch." Simple. And she got so upset that we were all worried for her. Sigh. 

The entire 2 hours when I was worried and looking out of the window every 5 minutes, there was only one thing I was thinking about. My Thatha. My Paternal Grandfather. I was 20 years old and in college. Usually I would be home around 5 pm. But on the day I would come late, I would find him standing outside the house, near the gate looking into the direction I would come from. If it was after 6.30 pm, then I can bet on my life that he would be standing there waiting for me. Sandhikaalam (dusk) was the curfew time according to him and in the morning when I left home, he would say "sandhikaalathukulla vandhudu" (Come back before dusk) and that was his way of saying good bye. Even when my parents did nt care, I knew Thatha would be waiting for me. And the most interesting part is that when I arrived late, he would see me and smile and walk back inside without asking me even a single question. I do not think I made him wait every other day but I do remember that in a span of 18 months, at least once a week I would momentarily forget about him because I was busy talking to the boys (what else!!) and would get home late and there I would see him in his white veshti and a mel thundu, waiting near the gate. And I don't remember he ever asking me why I was late. Not even once. And the next day, he would see me off with his usual send off. 

In those 2 hours, I was thinking about Thatha and his unconditional love and support and how patient he was with me and wowed to be the same way with Ashu. You give your child all the freedom they need and hope they are responsible with it. Thats all one can expect. And after all the careful planning on what to tell her and how to handle myself, I failed miserably! Guess one has to be a grandparent to achieve that kind of Zenness and a mere parent just won't do. In other words, Thatha did not slap me in my face because he knew Karma would! 

August 19, 2010

Kindergarten Girl.

It was Ashu's first day of Kindergarten yesterday and it was all so overwhelming. For me, that is! When we went for the orientation the day before, Ashu refused to stay in the class and started crying when we left her and went to attend the orientation. And I was surprised at her behaviour. I mean she has just began her 4th year in this school and she's crying? But then, its a new campus. Big school. New teachers. So settled her down calmly and ran away. When we went back after an hour, madam was happily playing with her best friend. Phew. This campus is not that near to our place which means we have to leave the house at 8 am. So yesterday, we managed to get up early and pack snack, lunch for her, eat breakfast and leave on time. Ashu got down and skipped to her classroom with the help of a teacher. I parked the car and walked to her class to leave the rain boots, jackets, indoor shoes, etc... I said bye to her and she waved and went inside. She had loads of things to tell in the afternoon when I went to pick her up. Today I did the run with Antu since Hd is out of town. And in spite of an emergency diaper change situation for Antu in the car and a bit of traffic due to road work, we were able to reach school on time and I dropped her off at the entrance and drove off. Sigh! My little girl is growing up. So am I. (I got up at 6.00 am two days in a row, alright?)

Antu is missing her Akka terribly. Yesterday when I came back home after dropping Ashu, she stood at the door and asked in a horrified tone, "Akka enga?" (Wheres Akka?) After two months of being inseparable, she does nt know what to do now. But that was only yesterday. Today madam has realized that she can play with all the stuff thats forbidden to her when Ashu is around! I told Hd about my sister and me when we were young. How this one year my sis used to leave for her school before me and come back after me. So I used to raid her cupboard and take her pens, pencils, rulers, erasers,... take them to school and then come back and put them where there were. (sorry, sis!) After all those years, Im still putting back things. Only now I work for someone else!

Heres to all the kids who are starting their first day of school or going back to school. Loads of love, learning and laughter. And good luck to the younger one raiding their cupboards! :)

January 28, 2010

You are it!

I did this tag for Ashu when she was 18 months. Am doing the same for Antu too as an update. Shes 19 months old.





3 Things That Scare Me
Nothing.
I said NOTHING.
I live with my mom, ok? Nothing can be more scarier than that.

3 People That Make Me Laugh
Me.
Myself.
Akka.

3 Things I Love
Dora title song.
Dora book.
Dora stuffed toy.

3 Things I Hate
Only 3? Ok I ll try to keep it short.
When I dont get my way while snatching stuff from Akka.
When Amma does nt fall for my fake puppy eyes and yells at me.
When Akka sits on Amma or Appas lap.

3 Things I Don't Understand
Im not as clueless as my akka was when she was my age. Ask me anything and I ll answer. Nothing is beyond my understanding. Although I dont understand why I cant play with the toilet roll and strew the paper all over the bathroom. And why cant I break every crayon Akka has safely kept for the past 5 years? Why cant I tear Akkas favorite paper books which she has nt even creased?

3 Things On My Floor.
The entire contents of the house. About 1008 things.
My mom coz shes always trying to clean up after me.
Akka coz shes worried what I have broken/tore/damaged this time.

3 Things I'm Doing Right Now
Playing Piano with my toes.
Nodding my head, shaking my butt and clapping along for the song "excuse me mr kandasamy"! Wondering what damage I can do next.

3 Things I Can Do
I can sing "W X Y And Z. Now I know my abc, next time wont you z z z" loudly.
I can say "amma look at me" out of the blue and make Amma jump.
I can sing "kaa kaa mai kondaa, kuvvi kuvvi pookondaa, pasoo pasoo paal kudu" thanks to Paati.

3 Ways to Describe My Personality
Rowdy Raakaayee.
Jealous Jalaja.
Appa Gondu.

3 Things I Cant do
muahaha! Theres nothing I cant cant do. I can list 3 things I wont do though, will do?
I wont let Akka be in peace even for a minute.
I wont do anything easily. Its exciting to make everything a battle.
I wont let Amma win over Karma.

3 Things I Think You Should Listen To
My Akka. She says some really silly stuff and makes me laugh.
My fav song of course. Kangal irandaal...
My grandpa, Pema and Pepa on the phone. I love to hear them talk.

3 Things I Think You Should Never Listen To
My mom. Shes evil.
The research that says kids below 2 should nt watch TV. bah!
That the youngest kids are trouble. You ll get lucky only once, capice?

3 Absolute Favorite Foods
Cheese
Flavored Yogurt
Junk

3 Things I'd Like to Learn
How to reach the higher shelves.
How to hoodwink Amma when Im doing something naughty.
How to speed dial Thatha when Im in trouble.

3 Beverages I Drink Regularly
Milk because I have to.
Water because I like the water bottle.
You mean theres something called juice in this world? *glares at amma*

3 Shows I Watched as a Kid
I dont have the attention span to watch dumb shows. So I watch
Dora title song.
Diego title song.
Gilmore girls title song.

Fellow Babies That I am Tagging
Munch

Come on fellas, lets show them what we second borns are made of. Long time no see. Keeping your mommies busy, I hope! :)

October 08, 2009

Are nt conversations like this supposed to happen when she is in her teens?

Amma, I don't like you.
Its OK. You don't ve to like me.
I am not going to talk to you forever.
That's OK too.
You are not my friend anymore Amma.
OK.
Amma..
(interrupting) I don't want to hear one more word from you.
But...
I said ...
Can I say one thing, Amma?
WHAT?
I don't like you.
Fine.
Fine.

September 15, 2009

The Karmic connection between Saakku Pai and Ballet.

When I was in college, post grad, I used to take a bus or my bike(kinetic) to get there. Some days, my dad used to drop me in his car if he had some work in that area. So this one day, I was getting ready and he offered a ride. I accepted and we walked to the car. The scene that met me was unbelievable. You cant guess even if I give you a million years. Imagine! A 20 year old getting dropped by her dad to college. A car whose entire back is loaded with saakku pai (jute bags) filled with some stuff. My dads boss is sitting in the passenger seat. The office security guy in full uniform ,with a huge moustache to boot, is sitting in the back holding the saakku pais in place so that I ve room to sit at the back!!! I double backed and told my dad that I ll take my bike after all, I ve to go to a friends house after class. He gave me a look and said, "vandeela eru"! (Get in!) Not wanting to create a scene before his boss, I did,while cursing him under my breath. I mean, is he a Moron? Which self respecting girl will sit amidst saaku pai and get dropped in college? We made some small talk with the boss and neared my college.

As soon as the side gate of my college came to view, I screamed ,"Stop here, Appa. I ll go through this gate". But fate was nt on my side that day. "No no. You ve to walk a long way if you go via this gate. Let me take you to the main gate. Saar wants to see your college campus too", said the man! Why, God, why? What did I ever do to you? Was this because I made fun of Shanthi when she came to school one day with a shaved head when we were four? Or because I pulled Chitras legs since she and her 3 siblings came in a Maatu vandi(bullock cart) to school? Or was it because I sniggered at Gundamma Ratnamala who brought this huge tiffin carrier(It was anju adukku, for Gods sake!) for lunch? It had to be Karma coming to bite my behind!

So dad pulls inside the main gate. Oh yes, my secret crush is standing right near his bike talking to some friends. He had to be there, right? And some of my classmates too. Oh, goody! "Stop here, Appa", I say again trying hard not to yell. But no. the man does nt get a hint even if the said hint is dancing butt naked in front of his eyes with a huge neon sign! He stops the car at last, right in the middle of the parking area. All eyes are in the car. I try to open the door and wriggle out. But the security guy is faster and wanting to prove hes worthy of the pay check, gets down first and with his side of the door left wide open, comes running to my side and opens the door for me. As if the Maruthi 800 stuffed with saaku pai was nt enough, the security guy opens the door for me as well! If ever there was a time I prayed Mother Earth to swallow me whole, that was it! I just gave my best dirty look to my father and muttered, "You could nt have stopped at the side gate, could you?" and walked inside with my head bent. Nothing dreadful happened actually in college. At least nothing that lasted more than a couple of days. I could always count on Sharmila and her current new boy friend to take over any other news! But I remember the feeling of humiliation. Till this day. May be I over reacted, may be I was just shallow, may be I was just silly, but the embarrassment was true.

I relived this incident last week. But from this side of the fence. It happened when Ashu told me, "You dont have to come to school to help me get ready for the ballet class, Amma. I can do it myself." And if this simple statement can hurt me so much when in fact she said that because she believes shes a big girl now and can dress up herself, how much more will it hurt me when she starts getting embarrassed by me? Sigh! Refer to my Karma statement on Paragraph 2. Circle of life, my dears, Circle of life. Its vicious.

June 17, 2009

One cant fight genes much, I guess.

Remember the quote in Friends when Rachel says, "Oh my God. I've become my father. I've been trying so hard not to become my mother, I didn't see this coming”? Its almost the same case for me. I was trying so hard not to become like my dad that I have become a deadly combo of both my mom and dad. Yesterday for the first time I called Ashu as Antu and she gave me a stern warning. "I'm not Antu, Amma. Don't call me Antu." Oh, man! Why am I having a Deja Vu?

Other things I say which I ve invountarily borrowed from my mom -

~ "I have only two hands. Cant you see?"

~ "I'm a human being, not a machine".(Funny when you say it in Tamil, manushi and machine rhyme!)

~ "If you can't help, at least don't trouble me". (ubayogamaa illennaalum, ubathravamaa illaama iru!)

~ "Kadangaari!" (literally means someone who owes you money. But its a common term to scold a child in Tamil.)

~ "If you keep doing like this, I ll just leave ok?" (Leave from the world actually but I keep that part open ended!!)

~ "What gall! Have nt sprouted three leaves and you talk this much?" (enna thimuru! mulaichu moonu ilai vidalai, enna pechu pesara?)

~ "If you talk like this, I ll leave once for all!" (and then mutter to myself because I cant bring myself to tell her yet - "afterwards you can cry Amma, Amma but I wont be there!") I know, I know! I'm a meanie!

~ "There are kids who are going hungry every day. Eat your food and don't waste it."

~ Rendum rendaappa, rendum keyandaappa! (Im baffled here for the translation. Literally means, "I ve two ladles and both of them are useless" and here the two ladles refer to Ashu & Antu!)

The most annoying thing my dad said which I'm repeating now:

"Ashu, everything has a lifetime. That zipper in the bag can be pulled up and down only like 100 times. If you unnecessarily keep doing it, it will stop working soon."
Replace zipper with light switch/TV remote/ballpoint pen/drawers/doors/windows/curtains/clips/fan/buttons,... and I use the same dialogue for everything!


*bangs head against the wall and then realizes that that's something her mom did too*
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