How clean is your house...

...when you leave in the morning to drop the kids in school? Im so curious to know. No prizes for guessing that my house looks like a pig sty (no exaggeration!) when I leave in the morning. Whoever said that theres a time and place for everything never had to do the school run, I guess! Toys everywhere! The kids room is a mess! The dining table looks like there was an explosion of cereal, bread and milk! There are clothes all over the bed! The kitchen looks as if an elephant had run rampant! (Not that my kitchen is big enough to fit an elephant!) And it drives me crazy! I hate coming back to a messy house but who has time to clean up in the morning when one is racing against the clock? The other day a friend invited me to her place impromptu after dropping the kids in school and I was amazed to see that her house was relatively clean! She does have older kids but still.... it hurt my ego! Theres no way in hell I can invite people just like that to my house. I would die!

Ashu wants to find her library book and a dozen books are in the floor. Antu drops the bowl and theres cereal everywhere. A wet towel here, a dirty jeans there, here a mess, there a mess, everywhere a mess, mess.... ARGH! Old Mc Donald is clearly not happy! Im wondering if some people employ house elves who clean up for them. This one day I had invited a mom and her child for a lunch playdate at my place after picking up Antu and the other child. And suddenly a coffee morning straight after Ashus school drop off came up too! So I had to get up, get the kids ready, make lunch, then take Ashu to school, go to the coffee thing at a friends place, then go to pick up Antu and come home with the other mom and the kid. Thankfully Hd was in town and he said he ll drop Antu and go to office. I begged him to clean up the house and leave it in a decent shape before he left the house. It was like a bomb ticking inside my head until I came home. And the man had kept his word, phew. May be its not a house elf I need after all, huh?! ;)

What do you do all day long?

Thankfully I don't get the above question a lot. People are generally wary around me, I guess. But to answer that question, some days are so relaxing. The Sun is shining, the birds are chirping, Antu takes 3 hours naps and Ashu gets picked up by a friend after school and I have a relaxing, long day reading a book or surfing the net or watching TV. Amidst the housework, of course. And then there are other days. Like the day when I had to drop Ashu at 8.30 am, come back home, get myself and Antu ready, leave for the school again at 10 am for the assembly where Ashu and co were dancing, then come back home, get lunch for us both, clean up, then go back to school at 3 pm to pick up Ashu and her friend. Drive to a birthday party with them. Drop the kids off and get some groceries done. Go back and pick them up. Drop the other girl at her place. Come home and its already 7 pm. Get dinner ready, feed the kids, bed time routine, clean the house and then get something to eat for myself. And before I know its almost midnight and I'm still scrubbing the kitchen counter! I realize I ve spent most of the day driving! Its time I get a drivers uniform and call Ashu, "Madam", I guess!

And some other day when Antu has gymboree, Ashu has school, I have a lunch to go to, Hd is traveling, Ashu is bringing her friend to our house after school,... and its crazy fitting everything in one day and dragging Antu everywhere. But yesterday was the pits. Murphy would ve been really proud! So the morning went well. Ashu in school and Antu and I at home. Wednesdays are early finish for Ashu and usually Antu cant nap those days because I have to leave the house just before 2 pm. Even if she's asleep, I pick her up and by the time I get to the car, shes awake. Yesterday was the same. She had a late lunch and was in full form and not a little bit sleepy. Around 2 pm, we go to the school to pick up Ashu and her friend A who was coming home with us. So far so good. Around 3 pm, things start going downhill.

* Ashu is extremely tantrummy. Shes behaving very badly.

* Antu is a like a wrecking ball creating havoc where ever shes going and whatever shes touching.

* Poor A is clueless whats happening in this crazy household.

* I ask Antu to nap. She refuses.

* I ask Ashu to be nice to her friend and play with her. She refuses.

* I get snacks ready for the girls.

* Around 4.30 pm, I lose my patience and take Ashu to a room and yell at her so badly that shes howling.

* Antu meanwhile has made such a mess in one of the rooms that I take her aside and yell at her as well. Now shes howling too.

* Around 5 pm, I say enough is enough and get Ashu ready for the swim class which is at 5.30 pm. Pack up Antu and with A, get into the car. The idea is to drop A and then go the pool since the pool is very near A's house.
* The GPS does nt get started and I'm worried. I go in the general direction of the pool hoping the GPS will come alive in a while and lead us to A's house.

* Meanwhile Antu has fallen asleep! uh ho.

* We are almost near the pool and the GPS is still silent. I park the car on the curb and pray to all Gods. Thankfully, it comes alive. Phew.

*I drop A and rush to the pool. Its already 5.30 pm.

* Park the car, put the sleeping child in my shoulder, carry the bag and run inside with Ashu. 2 sets of stairs and 2 doors later, we are inside the dressing area. Ashu cooperates fully, changes and one more flight of stairs later, we are in the shower area. Ashu again showers by herself and I leave her with the teacher. Usually I hang around by the side while Antu plays in the kiddie pool since the class is only for 30 mins. But today I tell the teacher I ll be back and go back to the dressing rooms. The bench is not too comfy so I sit on the bottom most stair with Antu on my shoulder. Lets say I was only missing a disposable cup in front of me. Would ve made quite a bit of money if I had a cup since everyone who crossed gave a me a pity smile!!

* One of the class moms arrived in a while and said she ll bring Ashu to me after shes done. Long live her!

* I was playing carrot harvest in my phone. Could nt even call Hd since there was no network. and then the phone dies on me!!!! (Good move, Murphy!) And Im thinking to myself, "Ashu better give Michael Phelps a run for his money or else..."

* Ashu finishes her class, takes a shower and comes to me. We go to the dressing room and by this time Antu has opened her eyes but is cranky and crying. By this time, I cant feel my right hand because it has fallen off somewhere! I plonk her on the bench and help Ashu dry her hair and change her. Then I see that theres a door right next to the dressing area which directly goes to the car park. Hallelujah! Don't ve to struggle two flights of stairs. So we go out only to realize that I ve left the entry ticket card in the locker door itself! And these doors cannot be opened from outside. ARGH!

* 2 more flights of stairs again with a crying Antu and a whiny Ashu. I ask the receptionist if she can bring my card but she tells me I ve to go myself and gives me a temp card. At least I found the card. And I go back to give the temp card, thank her and walk out. Its already 6.30 pm and I have a farewell party to go to at 7.00 pm!

* You want me to stop now, don't you? Well I wanted it to stop too. But it did nt. So hear me out.

* As soon as I start the car, I see the tank is almost empty. I panic. Pray to all Gods and somehow reach the gas station near our house. I fill the tank, ask Ashu to wait in the car and that I ll be back in 2 minutes, lock the car and go inside to pay. Ashu can see me through the glass door. So can I. Of course, there have to be 4 people in front of me all buying their entire weeks groceries at a GAS STATION! I keep an eye out at the car and signal to Ashu. Then my turn comes and I pay. I come out to see that the car door is wide open and Ashu standing outside and she's crying! Right by the side of a busy road! I was so shocked that I go speechless for a second. There are a few people staring at the scene. I quickly bundle Ashu inside and ask what the heck does she think shes doing? She could nt see me when I was paying, got worried (because I was out of her sight for TWO SECONDS!), took off her seat belt, climbed to the drivers seat, unlocked the doors, opened the door, climbed outside, did nt know whether to leave Antu and come and get me so she started crying. Because she was scared! I banged my head against the wheel, told her how dangerous her move was which made her cry more, of course. Then hugged her and drove home.

* Hd was home. Murphy took pity on me, I guess. About time, I say! I quickly changed, gave the shorter version of my day to Hd and left the house to attend a school mom's farewell party. It was at a friends place and a dance party at that. "Munni badnaam hui" many times and for the first time in my life, I wished I drank!

So come on all you SAHMs. Tell me the worst day of your mommy life.(Leave a link or write in the comment section.) Parul had the By the Water Cooler contest for the working types. Let us have some fun too. May be I ll consider the working moms stories too if its really, really bad! ;) No prizes vrizes because I'm no celebrity author. But I got two shoulders you can cry on!

Whoever said that "Giving birth is the easiest part of Motherhood", show me your feet please. *does saashtaanga namaskaram*

Home Sweet Home.

Yeah right! Who am I kidding? All the unpacking and organizing! I really am an idiot. Every time I go to the US, I tell myself not to go crazy while shopping. But I cant help myself but scream "but thats so cheap, thats so cheap" and buy everything under the sun. And do I have enough storage to keep all of that in my house here? The answer would be a big NO. The edible marker pens I bought at Michaels to decorate my future cupcakes - do I really need that? The fancy ribbons which were on sale? *bangs head* The dozen summer outfits for the kids which they cant wear more than a month here? *bangs head again* The nth pair of shoes, the bhel puri mix and the Tetley elaichi tea bags at the Indian store? *bang bang bang* Anyway, long story short - junk junk junk. (sorry sis!) As if all this is nt enough, I find instant Tomato rasam and Pepper rasam bottles in the suitcase. Courtesy - the master packer, my Mom. Next time they ask me at the airport if I packed the bags and if someone gave me something to keep, Im going to confess, "My mom packed. And she must have sneaked in Oorugaais for her Son-in-law or badham halwa for her grand kids. I honestly don't know!"

That apart, the jet lag is killing us and the kids are missing the US and the US folks like crazy. They don't say it as many words but it pains me to watch Antu see her doll after a month and getting all excited to show it to everyone. Only everyone is not here. Only plain old me! :( And Ashu asking after the caterpillars on the phone to my sis. The teeny weeny caterpillars Utbt gave Ashu. They grew fat and big (just like the book described they would!) and were in their cocoons when we left. We miss seeing the butterflies by a few days. Ashu is hoping that it will skype-casted live from there though! ;)

Hd has worked hard around the house last month and it shows. New upholstery for the arm chair, new cooking pots, new storage unit for his office desk, ... Ashu even commented, "Amma! Appa has changed the toilet paper also. Its blue in color!" He also managed to dispose Antus crib(sob! sob!) and moved Ashus toddler cot in her room. So Ashu and Antu would be sleeping in the same room from now on. Ashu was totally cool with the idea and Antu marked her territory by plonking Jamadu on the bed and climbing in even before I could prepare my big girl speech. Sigh! Whats her hurry? Hd also had a fully stocked fridge with idli batter, sambar, chutney and eggplant curry all of which he had made during the weekend and store bought chapathis. I felt only guilt(and very hungry!) since all I left for him when I went was the dirty laundry!! *gulp*

And oh! If you thought I forgot about the travel part, I did nt. It was so uneventful that I was surprised myself. The kids and I slept for 5 hours during the SFO-LON flight. So that was cool. And slept the entire LON-ZRH stretch too. I think BA read my blog or something because I got the stroller both in LON and ZRH as soon as I left the aircraft so that was a life saver. And I wizened up about the LON airport security and packed only idlis for the kids. Take that, you saddos! And I was so disappointed that they did nt ask me to taste the food because I was starving after standing in the line for such a long time! ;)

Lake Como.

This was one of our lousiest vacations ever! It rained when we reached Bellagio, it rained for the next 2 days and it was bright and sunny on the day we left. If I could go back in time, I would ve broken a sadhir thengai at the nearby Pillayaar temple before we left. (Yes, Amma. I should nt have left at raahu kaalam, I know!)

Let me start at the beginning. Como is around 3 1/2 drive from Zurich. We reached in EIGHT hours. First, we missed a road because there was some road work going on and it was confusing. Had to go 15 kms to just take an U turn. Then just before the Gothard Tunnel(the 17 km, 3rd longest tunnel in the world), the traffic built up and we like smart cookies took an exit to go via another town. But due to snow, every pass was closed. Add another 2 hours for this. We had lunch at a cosy joint and joined the Gothard traffic again. Miraculously, there was no jam and we just zoomed past. I was driving by this time and once we entered Italy and people started changing lanes without indicators, I said no way and asked Hd to drive. If we are going to die, let it be in his hands. Then we drove in those winding narrow roads, reached Cadennabia and took the car ferry (12 euros! akramam!) to reach Bellagio. We drove in the cobble stoned narrow roads and reached our apartment hotel. Hd dropped us and found a parking spot nearby to park the car. We saw the car again only when we left Bellagio on the 4th day.

Bellagio is the prettiest place ever. It is situated at the tip separating the Y shaped Lake Como. Looks like we are entering the middle ages when we enter Bellagio. Steps and slopes everywhere. Not exactly stroller friendly. But one can manage. There was a Gelateria right opposite our hotel where I had the most amazing french vanilla and pistachio Gelato for dinner! The next day, it was cloudy and gloomy and so cold! Good we all had taken our jackets and woollens. Actually, the kids had them. Hd and I were shivering in our spring jackets. We left for Villa Menzi. A leisurely walk in the gardens. It was nice. We got back to the center again, had a late lunch in a lovely restaurant, ran back to the hotel in the rain. Passed the day by eating more gelato, watching Chicken Little movie in Italian.

On Sunday it rained non stop. But we said enough is enough, covered antus stroller with the rain cover, ashu was all hooded up, Hd too. I held an umbrella and we walked to the ferry point, bought tickets for Lenno to visit Villa Balbianello. We got down in Lenno and was told that it was a 5 mins walk to the villa. Happily, we walked in the rain in the direction of the villa only to be told that its only the entry point and we ve to walk 20 mins uphill from there to reach the entrance. There was a water taxi stand but there was nobody there and we were nt sure what to do. So we walked uphill. Antu slept off in her stroller and poor Hd pushed the stroller and walked. Ashu was all wet and tired and hungry and cranky but poor thing did nt complain much. We reached the entrance after 30 mins. I knew there was a compulsory guided tour for the villa but only if there were enough people. But thankfully, there were other idiots like us waiting in the villa. We bought the tickets. We were told that there was a tour at 12.25 and we can see the gardens until then. While Hd and Antu stood under a shade, Ashu and I went to explore. The views are just breathtaking. The garden is beautiful. The villas location is just out of the world. But the rain ruined everything for us! Hd remarked as soon as we entered the gardens that he thought the last scene in Casino Royale was shot here. I had no idea. But the guided tour later confirmed that fact! whaddayaknow? I should ask James Bond to tell my husband to buy milk the next time! May be he ll remember then! After a wonderful tour of the villa, we wisely took a water taxi right from the garden(10 euros but we did nt care this time!) to Lenno(5 mins boat ride) and then from there a ferry back to Bellagio. Hd bought some pizza and we ate in our room because Ashu said she did nt want to go anywhere anymore! We ate more Gelato and watched Toy Story 2 , Stuart Little 1 and Stuart Little 2. All in Italian.

The next day was bright and sunny. But we had to leave. We took the car ferry back to Cadennabia and since Villa Carlotta was just few minutes away, we drove there. But there was not one parking spot for miles. We should ve come by the ferry to visit the villa, gone back and then should have drove our car. But we made a mistake. So waved to the villa from the outside, ate lunch in a very lousy restaurant in the middle of nowhere and drove back to Zurich. We reached in four hours. Hd is confident that we ll go back to visit Como in Summer. But I think Ashu is scarred for life. I asked her what was her favorite thing about the trip and she said, "nothing, amma"! And this is the girl who loves going on trips. Antu clearly is happy to be home too because yesterday I was taking the girls to the park in the evening and was getting ready and Antu said, "bye amma" and closed the door on me. She was still inside! As for me, I ll go back for sure. Its worth it just for the cassata flavored Gelato! :)

Yet another test to get into Mommy Heaven.

The plan was to travel from Zurich to Chennai together. With Hd. But as always, work came up and Hd asked me to postpone. But me being me, asked aloud "whats the worst that can happen" and decided to travel alone with 2 kids. I knew Ashu would nt be a problem as long as shes not told to walk while shes sleepy. Antu would be ok too since I have sure shot way to shut her mouth, by breast feeding! Kodis Mom, who I think is being my guardian angel without actually knowing it herself, posted recently about her trip alone with the kids and that gave me more confidence. I prepared Ashu for weeks that she was muttering, "I ll cooperate, Amma" even in her sleep. I tried making Antu walk but no luck there. She had her mind set only on crawling. May be she ll change her mind once she saw the airplane bathroom, I told myself. So on 20th afternoon, Hd left us in the airport, shook his head one last time at my foolishness and walked away. This is it, I told myself. The ultimate test!

I carried only a backpack with the bare minimum requirements. Ashu carried a tiny backpack and also a small children's pullman suitcase. It carried a set of clothes, toys, books and snacks for her. It was very light and I could carry it if it was too much for her. But the poor darling, pulled it by herself everywhere. So it sure was a good buy. Emirates has a good in flight entertainment so from Zurich to Dubai, she watched Mickey Mouse Wonder house and Little Einsteins back to back, sipped juice, nibbled on the flight food and had a good time. Antu slept off during take off and slept for two hours in the bassinet leaving me to eat in peace and also visit the bathroom. Then I fed her some baby food, read to her, sang to her, changed her and kept her busy. When a kind gentleman smiled at her, I narrowed down the victim and plonked Antu on his lap and used the bathroom and came out in a record time of 5 1/2 seconds, thanked him and picked Antu and walked back to our seat before the man could realize what had happened! Ashu nodded off just before we landed in Dubai. Trouble, I told myself!

Ashu cried when I woke her up and asked her to walk. But she was ok within a few minutes. I found the complimentary strollers at the Dubai airport for Antu and after that, it was an easy ride. We window shopped a bit, had hot chocolate and I fed and changed Antu and it was already time to board the Chennai flight. We did nt get the first row seats with bassinets for this leg. But it was no so bad. Ashu slept the whole time. Antu was a little fidgety but otherwise ok. One thing I should ve done was to take Ashu to the bathroom and used it myself just before we landed. But there was no time and on hindsight, that was a big mistake. We landed in Chennai and I felt invincible and patted myself at my back not knowing what was in store for me!

I had filled all our immigration forms in the plane. When we walked out of the plane, there was a long line for the swine flu test. Since there are no complimentary strollers like in Dubai airport and we dont get our own strollers at the gate anymore, I had to carry Antu all the time and my hands almost died on me and fell off. Ashu seemed to decide enough was enough and refused to do anything I said. And then the swine flu testing person asks me to fill 3 more forms with all our details. What am I supposed to do with Antu? Leave her on the tobacco spat, stained floor and fill the forms? Yes, ladies and gentlemen, thats exactly what I had to do. The lady just felt Antus head for temperature, asked us if anyone has fever or cough and sent us off. When she tried to touch Ashus head, she wriggled and ran away! Then we stood in the immigration line for a long time. Just before it was our turn, Ashu started bawling and said she wanted to use the bathroom otherwise she ll just "go there"! I thought about it for 2 seconds, then took her to the bathroom which was way past behind the swine flu lines. Ashu took one look at the bathroom and refused to go in. Then she did nt know how to use the Indian style toilets, I did nt know what to do with the small suitcase or Antu. Thought its ok to lose the suitcase than Antu and took Antu inside leaving the suitcase outside. Ashu created all sort of mess you dont want to know about and after almost slipping and dropping Antu in the toilet, we came out unhurt but not the most hygienic!

Then we came back to the immigration line and when I requested a person in the front if I can go before him since I was standing in the line before, the man REFUSED! I thanked him and tried the handicapped and diplomat line. Since there were many wheelchair bound people before me, it took almost 30 mins for our turn. Antu cried 29 mins of it and both my hands were completely dead and I would nt even have realized if they had fallen off! Ashu was the most cranky by this time and when we reached the hand baggage screening area, she refused to part with her backpack. The kind man at the security took one look at me and waved us off. I crossed the exit to go to the baggage claims where my father and father in law waved at us. I glared at them and if I had a third eye, they both would ve been burnt to ashes in 2 seconds. As luck would have it, I got my stroller and the two checked in suitcases after 40 minutes. By this time, I was beyond caring and left Antu on the floor where she was crawling and almost getting trampled by people and their trolleys. Ashu was a little recharged after seeing a glimpse of her Thathas and looked out for our suitcases which showed up at last. The porter helped me with the baggage and after what seemed an eternity, we walked out. I plonked Antu to the first pair of hands that reached towards me. Thankfully, it was my fathers.

Verdict: Doable journey with a nightmarish end.