Lawyered!

Me: Ashu, please go and fold your blankets on the bed. Yours and Antus.

Ashu: Ok amma.

5 minutes later, I pass the room and see that Ashus blanket is neatly folded while Antus blanket is not. 

Me: Ashu, why have nt you folded Antus blanket?

Ashu: Because she said she ll do it herself.

Me: Antu, why did nt you fold your blanket then?

Antu: I did nt tell her I will fold it. 

Me: Well?

Ashu: She said that amma. 

Antu: I did NOT!

Me: What exactly did she say Ashu?

Ashu: She said "I can do everything by myself. I don't need your help."

Me: *light bulb glows* And WHEN did she say this?

Ashu: She said it yesterday.

Me: Yesterday? When?

Ashu: When I asked her if I can help her with the puzzle and she said she can do everything by herself!

Me: !!!!

Bye Bye, Third Grade & KG 1.

What a school year this has been! Every year, I tell myself that time flies and things work out and I should nt worry too much. But I worry! Will the girls be happy in school? Will they make friends? Will the teacher be nice? Will my German ever improve? And most importantly, will there be English speaking moms I can befriend?  :) But as always, things worked out. 

Antu had a fantastic year and made loads of friends and loves her teacher. She will be in KG 2 from August with the same teacher and friends, so she's looking forward to it and to boss around the new KG 1 kids! :) She invited 8 girls from her class for her birthday party this year and more than all the planning I had to do for the party, I was stressed about understanding Swiss German!! (which is different from the High German!) The kids start with High German only from Grade 1 and speak only in Swiss German in KG. My German failed me when faced with little girls fighting over a red balloon, I tell you!! 

Ashu had a much better year than last year. Made more friends, was happier and her German is so much better too! She did not even want a birthday party last year but had school friends over and had a bollywood themed party this time. :) She had lots more home work, projects and reports this year and she managed to do everything without any major help from us except a big project at the end of the year for which parents were supposed to help out. It was a lot of work for all of us and she did a great job and I am so proud of her! Their class had a sleepover in the school on Tuesday and they had loads of fun and said bye to their teacher of three years! 

And yes, I managed to find a group of English speaking moms! :) Have a great summer, everyone! 

27.06.2014

Dear Antu,

My heart weighs a tonne as I write this and its not only because I have to start buying train and bus tickets, swimming pool and other miscellanious entry tickets now that you are six and they are not free anymore! Well that too! But mainly because you are SIX! The first thing you did today after waking up was to go and stand against the height chart and see how much taller you have got now that you are six! :) You have had the most exciting year but then being Antu is always exciting! You are always singing or dancing or living in your fancy pretend world! We are all mere servants who exist to fulfill your every little wish! A simple "no" from me will make you cry buckets and declare "You don't even like me!" and stomp off! Your dad though is a big fan of your extreme drama and laughs at the most inopportune moment making you even more mad! Will the man ever learn, you think?

First year of Kindergarten is almost done and you are in love with your school, your teacher and friends. You walk to school and back on your own and so very responsible with your things. You notice everything thats happening around you and come home and tell me everything! You have started reading a lot and progressed to chapter books now and its heartening to see you follow your sister in this regard. I found you reading while walking to the car the other day and I had to ask you to stop doing that but not without a secret smile in my face! :) Its so sweet to hear you talk in German to your friends and please forgive me for taking secret videos of you doing that! Almost every video begins with you asking me "Are you taking a video?" and me lying "Of course not!" I know. I am awful like that!

You have a birthday party tomorrow at home with a few friends from school and you have planned every last detail! Your excitement is infectious and even Ashu, who could nt care two hoots about her own party, is planning stuff for you! But then having seen how awesome you were to Ashu on her birthday and the multiple birthday parties she had this year, its not surprising. Got to give it you for being so fair! You make everyone around you feel special and make sure everyone treats you special too! You even demand it! Which is something I can learn from you! At heart, you are a total daddy's girl but include me once in a while so that I don't feel hurt. Its the same with the Thathas, Perippa and Maama too! You have figured out that men are lot less complicated and most of all, they don't tell you what to do which is all you ever want!

You have a beautiful singing voice and know all the "Frozen" songs by heart and keep singing all the time. You love puzzles and origami and playing dolls. You love to dress up. You are cycling and roller blading already and go to swimming and ballet classes. You have said you want to learn the Piano and not Violin! You are Miss.Chatter box! Whenever we talk about moving out of Switzerland, you say "no way" and are almost in tears. Its touching how connected you feel to this place and the people. After all, this is the only home you have ever had. Today your aunt called and I was faking to cry on the phone and you were quick to tell your Perimma "Amma is crying because I am not a baby anymore!" Well you will always be my baby and no number can change that ever, got it? I love you loads my little baby and have a great birthday!

Love,

அம்மா.

Friends, Romans, countrymen,...

It was our 14th wedding anniversary on June 5th. It happened to fall on a long weekend, so packed our bags and went to Rome and Naples for 4 days. Was a fun trip. The girls had a blast eating Pizza in the birthplace of Pizza. The two days in Naples, we hunted down the oldest pizzeria, the best pizzeria, the famous pizzeria and ate pizza like it was going out of fashion! According to Antu, the best trip ever! And we also got two rooms with a connecting door in our Hotel which was the highlight of the trip for Ashu! She would nt let me use even the bathroom in their room!!! :)

For me, the highlight was Mt.Vesuvius and Pompeii. Man, Pompeii was amazing! A city which was destroyed by the volcano 2000 years back and then discovered intact 200 years back! Its like The Mummy meets Tomb Raider! We went to the Mt.Vesuvius first and walked along the rim of the crater and Ashu was all "we are walking on a volcano! which is active! which is very dangerous!" And in the afternoon, we went to Pompeii. Ashu had read a Magic Tree House book on Ancient Rome and Pompeii so she was fully prepared! We saw the houses, ovens, baths, port, temples, ... even the chariot marks on the roads! Water fountains, scribbles on the walls, frescoes, plastered dead bodies, pots, furniture, Forum, Amphitheatre,... Even a Brothel! I took a candid photo of Hd coming out it and have threatened to use this evidence against him! ;)

We also went to the Capri Island from Naples and it was so beautiful! We went quite late though so could nt go to the Blue Grotto which is supposed to be amazing! Next time, perhaps! Since Hd and I have been to Rome before, we did not do much except walking, walking and more walking and showing the sites to the girls! Poor things cooperated well without complaining too much. There was always the Gelato break whenever we were too tired or or making Ashu tell some trivia about the ancient Romans and traumatize Antu! (Did you know that they washed their clothes in urine, they ate Flamingos, etc... ) I, for my part, traumatized Ashu by describing the battles in the Colosseum and she just could nt understand how people can watch people getting killed and be entertained! ( Did you know that sometimes the Romans flooded the Colloseum and had boat battles?!)

Italy has become truly out favorite destination! So much to see and so much to do. Relatively cheaper, great food. Its hot and dirty and but the place is alive! I guess its a lot like India! :)

"People who create their own drama deserve their own Karma".

What goes around, comes around! Nothing makes you believe in Karma like when one becomes a parent! Today around 2 pm, Ashu gets a call from her friend, Az asking if she wants to go to the pool with her. Ashu looks at me and I nod my head and she excitedly says yes to her friend, packs her bag and leaves the house. To the pool which is 5 mins walk from our house. At least thats where I assumed they were going and thats what Ashu told me as well. Cut to 5.30 pm - no sign of Ashu. At 6 pm, I am worried. Hd who was watching Nadal making history was worried enough to take his eyes off the TV and look at me. He then walked to the pool to see if she was there or in the nearby park but the pool was closed already and no one in the park. Then I started calling Az's home number, her parents mobile number but no answer. So I walk to Az's house which is 2 mins walk from our house. No ones home. I call three more of Ashus friends who are all in the neighborhood asking if they know where Az and Ashu went but no one knows. At 7.30 pm, my sister calls and asks if Ashu is home because I told her at 5.30 that she's not home yet. Now she's worried too! I knew Ashu would be fine and she would come home soon and safe but the not knowing where she was, was driving me crazy. And the fact that the girl did not think to call from her friends moms phone and tell me where she is and when she will be coming back. Not to mention the guilt trips I was taking. "I am an irresponsible parent! I should have checked with Az's mother. I should have told Ashu to call me if theres any change. " sigh. Anyway, Ashu got back at 8 pm. She had gone to another pool which is a 10 minutes drive away.  "I did nt know you will be worried, Amma. I was having so much fun that I did nt know it got so late. I did nt have my watch." Simple. And she got so upset that we were all worried for her. Sigh. 

The entire 2 hours when I was worried and looking out of the window every 5 minutes, there was only one thing I was thinking about. My Thatha. My Paternal Grandfather. I was 20 years old and in college. Usually I would be home around 5 pm. But on the day I would come late, I would find him standing outside the house, near the gate looking into the direction I would come from. If it was after 6.30 pm, then I can bet on my life that he would be standing there waiting for me. Sandhikaalam (dusk) was the curfew time according to him and in the morning when I left home, he would say "sandhikaalathukulla vandhudu" (Come back before dusk) and that was his way of saying good bye. Even when my parents did nt care, I knew Thatha would be waiting for me. And the most interesting part is that when I arrived late, he would see me and smile and walk back inside without asking me even a single question. I do not think I made him wait every other day but I do remember that in a span of 18 months, at least once a week I would momentarily forget about him because I was busy talking to the boys (what else!!) and would get home late and there I would see him in his white veshti and a mel thundu, waiting near the gate. And I don't remember he ever asking me why I was late. Not even once. And the next day, he would see me off with his usual send off. 

In those 2 hours, I was thinking about Thatha and his unconditional love and support and how patient he was with me and wowed to be the same way with Ashu. You give your child all the freedom they need and hope they are responsible with it. Thats all one can expect. And after all the careful planning on what to tell her and how to handle myself, I failed miserably! Guess one has to be a grandparent to achieve that kind of Zenness and a mere parent just won't do. In other words, Thatha did not slap me in my face because he knew Karma would! 

27.04.2014

Dear Ashu,

 You do not like too much attention to yourself and I don't know what you will make of all these birthday posts I write every year. May be these letters are just for me even though they are addressed to you. I look at the photos and letters from previous years and my eyes brim over with tears. How time flies and how fast a child grows! Sigh! This year has surely gone by in a hurry. You have always been very matured for your age and as years go by, the changes in you shock me more and more. "Are you Happy, Ashu?" is the question I ask you a lot these days because you seem to be in a "Why am I here?" mode most of the time. You have such simple needs and I learn a lot from you every day. I want to be you when I grow up! :) 

You are the queen of moderation. You like to dress up but you don't care about it too much. You like to eat sweets and watch tv but can also go days without asking for these. You have friends but not many. You talk to people but not too much. Of course, when it comes to reading, its a different story all together. The other day I was cleaning your room and was putting away some stuff to give away and was asking you and Antu what you need and what you don't. You said, "You can give anything away, Amma. Except my books!" You have high expectations for yourself and when you think you have nt met them, you get extremely upset. I make the situation worse by commenting on it which in turn makes you turn nasty to me which makes me lose my temper and the cycle goes on! I wish I were calm and collected and all zen because you deserve a mother like that. Better luck next time, kiddo!

As always, you are doing fine in school, making new friends and keeping in touch with old friends. When your best friend G dropped in on a surprise visit two weeks back to see you, you were so happy! Even though it has been a year since she left the country, you both started giggling as soon as you met and closed the door on us and talked for hours! Which is saying a lot for a child like you. Its heart warming to see you in that mode, Ashu and I wish you have many, many more people like these in your life. This year, we are in the US and you are celebrating your birthday with your uncle and aunt. Its so special for you. Also a bit sad that this is the first birthday you are away from your father and both of you are missing each other a lot. But my very dear cousin and his wife came to visit and theres a big party waiting for you in a few hours so I hope that makes up for it. Try to enjoy all the attention, please!

Antu and you! Sigh! Where do I begin? Lets just 

say planets were nt aligned well for sisters this year and leave it at that. Im gritting my teeth and telling myself that its a phase and you both will grow out of it and I hope it happens really soon for my own sake! I have been saying the exact same dialogues to you girls which my mom used to say to us and I don't even have to rehearse the lines. They automatically pop out of my mouth when the need arises. One would think that two kids who share their mom and dad with each other would have no problem sharing a lousy pencil or a piece of paper between them but NO! Apparently its too much to ask! I hope nine is the magic number and you become the doting sister you were once again. That said, you are very protective of her and ever since we lost Antu in Disneyland for half a minute three years back, you watch her like a hawk every time we are in crowded places. You know every little thing about her. Which is sometimes good and at time, very BAD!

India, Austria, Morocco, USA trips happened this year and you are a happy traveller. We visited Universal studios and Sea World the last couple of days with two sets of uncles and aunts and you had a blast! When almost every child was walking around with souvenirs and stuffed toys, I was the mean mom who would nt buy anything for you two. At the end of the trip, when I relented and let you girls choose one thing, Antu chose the little girl with a unicorn and you wanted all the three girls from the Despicable Me movie. When I said one, you said that the three girls are together and you can't choose just one and you were ok not buying them rather than buying just one. Even though its just a silly movie, it makes me proud that you care about people. I am little proud of myself that I did nt give into the marketing scam! Happy 9th Birthday my little big Girl! Its double digits from next year and I hope to cherish this special year as much as I can and hold on to this nine year old you for ever!

Love,

அம்மா.

Walk in the woods with "Aagasatha..."

I have been hearing good reviews about the songs from the Tamil movie "Cuckoo" and about the movie too. But I have not watched the movie and heard the songs only last week. I had just downloaded the songs in my ipod and took it with me when I went for a walk this week. I was exploring a new path in the woods near our house and this song "Aagasatha..." came on and before I know, tears were trickling down my face and I kept walking and crying and towards the end of the song, I started sobbing uncontrollably. I was not feeling sad or upset though. I don't know if it was the music, the lyrics, if knowing that its a love song between two blind people, if it was the silent woods, the sky, the trees, the sun,.. May be it was a bit of everything but it was such a magical moment. One of those "Whats the point of this life" moment. Sigh!

Winter Sports.

The arrival of winter meant that our weekend was also snatched by the kids. They have ice skating bang in the middle of the afternoon on Saturdays and Skiing on Sundays which takes up at least 4 hours of the day. Hd is in charge of weekends but still the cooking, cleaning, getting the kids and the husband ready and throwing them out of the house in time takes such a toll on me! Hd also conveniently went off to India for a week during the kids Ski break which meant I had to take Antu almost every day skiing on my own. 

Ashu, thankfully, agreed to go to a ski camp again this year. So she was gone from 8.30 to 4.30 every day for five days. She had fun, got a medal but swore she is done with skiing and will never ever ski again. This was two weeks back. She went skiing again today of course! :) Antu had started skiing last year and hated it. But she warmed up to it this year and also had her best friend for company so that went well. She moved up a level and took the T bar and skied in a beginner slope today which was a big deal for her and made for a proud dad! :)



The skating show was yesterday and Ashu had fun even though she complained shes in the babies group and they just have to go in circles! :) Some of the girls who did solo performances were amazing! Made me wonder how much much more dedicated and hard working the olympians would be! Antu agreed to ice skate this year but she said no to participate in the show! "Because I am not good at it, Amma", she said! While Ashu is the exact opposite. So Ashu had to take a test to move up a level in Ice skating and she was desperate to pass the test because she thought she was too old to be in that group with 5 and 6 year olds! So the doting dad signed her up for a few private lessons so that she gets individual attention. I took her for a few lessons and she enjoyed them immensely. The day before the test, she asked when the next private lesson will be and I told her that there will be no more private lessons and she better focus on the tips and pass the test if she wants to move up. So she says "Its ok if I dont pass the test. I loved the lessons and I would like to do more. I just want to keep learning, Amma."

"Naan karai eritten. Neenga innum karai eraama nikkarele?"* moment!

* Slap in the face

Morocco.

We were in Morocco for a week from Xmas eve to New years eve and had a fantastic time. It was a great escape at least for a week from the bitter cold here although the evenings were quite chilly and the nights were freezing there too. We landed in Marrakech and roamed around the city for 2 days visiting museums, madrasas and mosques and shopping like crazy in the souks and drinking mint tea by gallons! Then through a tour operator went around the country up to Sahara and back the rest of the 5 days. Another family also joined us from here and their 7 year old son and Ashu were quite a company for each other and a sick/throwing up/starving/low energy Antu was quite a company for us!! But of course everything was worth it when we saw the sand dunes! The camel ride and the hike to the sand dunes, the sunset, the sand,.... everything was mind-blowiningly beautiful! We camped in the desert for a night and slept it in a tent in the freezing weather under many, many blankets and the starry night sky was too beautiful to describe. Ashu and Antu have never seen that many stars in their lives and were totally blown away! The winding, curvy roads through the High Atlas mountain range and the landscapes and the gorges and valleys were straight out of a hollywood road movie!

Our Bedouin driver for 5 days was a sweet guy and kept calling the girls Fatima and nagged us to play bollywood music in the car and I am proud to say that I  introduced him to Ilayaraja music! :) Everyone in Morocco knows Shah Rukh Khan! And at the end of a week, I kept saying Insha Allah after every sentence! Its very infectious, I tell you. We saw many, many cats. Marrakech was like 80s and 90s small town India and it was like going back in time. The people are extremely nice and polite and the Riads (tradtional Moroccon houses turned into hotels) we stayed were awesome! I might go back just to stay in these Riads. From the outside, there is this small door in a dark alley but inside its like an Alibaba cave! With huge courtyards and spacious rooms and so unique and charming. And beautiful terraces. And the staff bend backwards to make you comfortable. The last day we stayed at a mountain retreat in the High Atlas and that place was amazing too and the location was fantastic. But the access road was pathetic!

Vegetarian food was a little hard to get especially at the remote restaurants we stopped for lunch but breakfasts and dinners made up for it. At least Hd eats omelettes. I ordered a salad and stuffed them inside the bread and had to make my own sandwich everyday! Ashu survived on bits of bread and salad and the junky snacks I carried with me while Antu went on a hunger strike for her right to starve! :) The five day road trip was a bit much for the kids and us too but when the destination is Sahara, theres no other way, I guess. Now back home and fondly remembering the desert. I think if I give a good shake to our sneakers, I might still find some sand and it would be a sight to the sore eyes!

Happy New Year folks! Hope 2014 brings you all the things you wish for! Insha Allah! :)

Of Music and Dance.

November and December were again that time of the year where I was busy coaching the girls group for a dance program and Ashu's violin recital. Both went well this year. And Antu too joined the dance this time and since she was the youngest in the group, she was the cutest too! :) They danced to "Bawre", a fun song from the movie Luck by Chance.  There were 10 girls this time and though it was loads of fun practicing and choreographing, it was a nightmare to organize a day and time which would suit everyone! As always, we managed somehow and pulled it off. Not to mention it was a good workout for me as well! :)

The violin Recital was last Monday and Ashu played two solo pieces and a group recital. This is her third year and shes enjoying playing now and its a joy to listen to her these days. I try really hard to suppress my inner tiger mom avatar and let her be! :)

Here's one of the pieces she played. Bach's "Aus der Bauernkantate".

Kinderhotel.

Its November already? Even my one post a month resolution is hard to keep. October was great. At least it did nt snow like last year, phew! So we could enjoy the great outdoors more. And when the kids had 2 weeks fall break, we went to Austria and stayed in a Kinderhotel for 5 days and it was a blast! Four more families came with us too so it was like a big fat Indian wedding! This was the first time we are going to a Kinderhotel and I wonder why we don't have that concept in many places! So the place we stayed was in Galtur which is a ski resort in winter. It had already snowed there in October but it was sunny and bright and the views were to kill for. The children have a play area where they are supervised. They get their own breakfast, lunch and dinner form the buffet. The hotel arranges outings for them. They can watch a movie post dinner in a big screen. They can take the bicycles and go biking. Or use the pedal go karts and take them for a ride. It is just heaven for the parents. And not to mention the spa, pool, jacuzzi, sauna, etc... Our days went like this every day - Get up and have breakfast and check the kids in the childrens area. I also gave Ashu a room key and she and her BFF along with Antu had a blast. I told Ashu she can do whatever she wants as long as she had Antu with her! And she did! Hd and I along with our friends set out for a hike...  and it was one of the beautiful hikes I have ever done. Breathtaking views! And we would come back around lunch time. By the time, the kids would have the lunch by themselves or we will have it together. Then relax for a bit and hit the pool with the kids. Then dump the kids with the men and us ladies enjoyed the spa. Bliss! The kids dinner began at 6.30 and they went to watch a movie at 7.30 while we were served five course dinner! Sigh! That was the best part of the day where we could have adult conversation instead of doing panchayathu between the girls on who called whom stupid first!!! And then in groups we went out for moon lit walks and when the men had enough and went to bed, us ladies sat and talked for hours! I would give anything to do this kinda vacation every time! I did nt want to come back home at all! 

Leaving you with my favorite photo of the trip.

Pillayar Chaturthi Special.

The Plliayar under the blue umbrella made by yours truly under the able instruction of Antu! And the one under the Red umbrella by Ashu all on her own. We have improved soooo much from last year! :) 

Hope Pillayar brings all good things in all our lives! 

India Trip Report.

Four weeks in India was hectic as usual. Apart from the usual Madras and Kumbakonam trips, managed to go to Hyderabad for a weekend to see Utbt and family after three loooong years. The highlight of the trip was Ro, Utbt and me walking around Charminar in the middle of the night thanks to the Ramzan night market. What an awesome experience! A stomach bug which caused havoc to my system a day back could nt stop me from eating pani puri at Kailash Parbat and the yummy biscuits from Karachi Bakery! Ashu and Antu had a blast with Utbt's girls and it was so heart warming to see the foursome together having fun! In less than two days, they managed a pajama party, movie night, camping (in the hall!), swimming, building legos, reading, visiting park, shopping and million other little things. Talk about time management! Thanks Ro for taking time to meet us and it was lovely to see Ayaan and Tarana too. (Happy? I mentioned you first! :) When in Madras, Ashu did nothing except taking over a room and setting camp there with her Kobo. (See pic.) She would come out only during meal times!

Did nothing new in Madras this time except visiting the Vandaloor Zoo and Dakshin Chitra. And a fabulous puppet display near Kanchipuram organized by the Kanchi trust. And the Phoenix Mall, if you insist! And visiting friends and family too! Stayed a night in Pondicherry at a resort before proceeding to Kumbakonam and I enjoyed my first trip to Pondi. Visited the ashram, Auroville, a few temples, the beach, etc... While Hd and the in laws left from Kmu the next day and Hd to Zurich the day after, the kids and I stayed on in Kmu for one more week before doing the same. It was a week of doing nothing for me and it was pure bliss, as usual. I dont know what I will do if I don't get to recharge my batteries like that once a year or so. Long live Mothers!

The kids did nt want to leave the house and were busy with a cat and two kittens outside our house and all their friends and cousins from the colony who come after school to play with them. My parents were so thrilled about the Kallanai dam opening its gates and water flowing into Kaveri and Kollidam that we went all the way there to see it on Aug 5th. The kids hated road trips there and had to be dragged out! "I dont know why Thatha is so excited that theres water in Kaveri! Are nt rivers supposed to have water?!!", asked Ashu! Poor girl! Thatha and Paati, of course, were over the moon and were photographing like crazy! The girls found a bouncy castle and a few rides on the other side of the dam and were quite happy! I just wanted to get back so that we can buy the Ashoka Halwa at Thiruvaiyaru before the shop (Aandavar Halwa Shop) runs out of it! It was devamirtham, if you must know! :) The next day, Antu said that she had a dream that Kaveri came and asked her to come and see her and when she went, there were crocodiles in the river! Im still analyzing that one! :)

A trip to Swamimalai Temple and an Aandaal Kalayanam at my Aunts house rounded off the trip nicely. Not to mention Ashu falling down and majorly scraping both her knees! The scar will remind her of this trip for a long, long time! I had long chats about many, many things with my grandma cuddling to her in bed and wished I were a kid! She is 98 now and according to Antu she is going to die soon because shes almost 100! I know teaching this kid math was bound to come back and bite my behind! When it was time to leave Kmu, Antu started bawling that she wanted my mom to come too! Ashu blinked many times and declared that she hated me! I guess everyone has their own coping mechanisms! I had the halwa handy! My dad accompanied us to Madras. Antu bored me to death by telling awful slug jokes from Panruti to Vikravandi and the horrible, horrible roads paled in comparison!

Loaded with boxes from Krishna Sweets, more kurtas than I need, a million children's books, home made pickles and bakshanams and a vague memory of watching Mariyaan at Thyagaraja theatre, we came back to Zurich with a heavy heart last Wednesday. I have been walking around with a lump in my throat ever since! Where the hell did I keep that dabba of halwa? *blinks back tears*

3.Klasse & Kindergarten.

Ashu and Antu began their yet another first day today in third grade and Kindergarten 1 respectively. I could hear the butterflies fluttering in Ashu's stomach! She wrote an email to her friend yesterday which said "My school starts tomorrow and I wish I can stay home a little while longer!" My poor litte darling! Antu, of course, has been dying to go to KG with her BFF and thats the only thing she kept talking about this whole year. The day was here today at last and Hd and I walked her to her class, stayed for a while and said bye to her and came back home. She seemed thrilled to be there!

In the afternoon, Ashu walked to the KG and met me there at noon and we picked Antu and got home by 12.05! Ashu has agreed to this pick up duty from next week which means I dont have to step out, yay! Of course, Antu is all "I can go on my own" already! Sigh! Why do they have to grow up so fast?

On our way.

Five days of shopping and packing and organizing and cleaning frenzy later, we are packed and ready to go. India - here we come! 

Summer Holiday Special - Day 1.

First day of summer holidays went in what else but cleaning the kids room! Tonnes of crafts and colorings and drawings and cards to be recycled! Broken parts of toys and cheap goody bag toys and "precious" stuff found in parks and pavements to be trashed! Books which have been read a million times, books which have nt been touched in a million years and books which the kids have outgrown to be hidden! The list goes on... 

I did the best thing -  threw out Hd and the kids out of the house - and tackled the mess for four straight hours and still have nt even caused a dent. Sigh! Of course I spent half the time reading their "stories", admiring their art work, laughing out loud at the funny lists they are so fond of writing,.. 

And I could nt throw the below one without taking a photo first. Three months back when I asked Ashu where she wanted her birthday party, this is the list she came up with!

Another school year, done and dusted!

So its that part of the year again. Last day of school. That melancholic feeling I get every year wishing time to stop still. Last year this time, I was second guessing our decision to switch Ashu to the local school and was worrying so much. Now a year has just flown by and Ashu has adjusted to the new system remarkably well. In the Swiss schools, the children have the same teacher for three years. So her current teacher will continue in third grade too and Im glad. She has gone on school trips, participated in shows and musicals, made friends,... She has made good progress in speaking German and tells me school gossip too! :)

Antu finally says good bye to pre schools and play groups and gets into Kindergarten this year. Since shes June born, she missed the cut off last year and she has been waiting to go to KG. The KG building is just next to our apartment and we can see the building from our window. Most of the kids from her playgroup are going to KG and her best friend and her are with the same teacher. So its going to be a fun year, I hope. She understands Swiss German quite well and the only one in the family to do so! I confess I secretly video tape when she brings friends home and talks to them in Swiss German!

Taking their pictures this morning was fun! When I asked Ashu to smile and pose, she grudgingly did and when I was clicking the third photo, she rolled her eyes and said, "You realize Im getting late for my school, Amma?" and scootered away before I could answer. Antu, on the other hand, has all the time in the world for photos. She strikes pose after pose, asks me to show the photos and asks if she has blinked(?), then poses again, then "one silly face photo Amma, please" and left for school only after approving the photos! Chalk and cheese!

27.06.2013

Dear Antu,

You are five today and I am in denial. Well, whats new? Its always tough for me around your birthday. How can the baby of the family get older? But of course, you spend year after year looking forward to your birthdays. You planned your party long back. That you wanted in your playgroup with your favorite teacher organizing it and your dear grand parents present. So we had the party last week since your grand parents were leaving before your birthday. And you had another party the week before with just us family since your Perimma and Perippa were here. And then you are taking cupcakes to your class today. Not to mention the truck loads of gifts you have been getting. Nothing makes you happy in this world like opening a present! :)

You have been enjoying ballet and swimming this year. Your musical sense and the way you move when you hear a song and the way you are constantly humming songs has become legendary in the family. My mom calls you mini-me since you are a reduction xerox of me in many, many things. I am both proud and scared at the same time! You have many, many friends and if you can have your way, you will never ever come home straight after school. I shudder at the thought of you walking to school and back on your own from August. A kindergartener, sigh! Your best friend R and you are together in the same class in KG too and I cant wait to see you both holding hands and walking to school!

You have just about began reading and writing and very excited about it. You love your playgroup which you go to two days a week and hate your preschool which you go the other three days. You are totally daddys pet and always locking horns with me. Your sister and you fight for everything these days and I dont know what to do to make you guys be nice to each other. When you are nice to her, she ignores you and when shes nice to you, you provoke her. Im the one who is losing hair over it though. When I yell at you or give you a time out, Ashu is the first person you go to to get a hug. And shes the one you go for help when you know you are in trouble with me. Your Tamil has improved leaps and bounds since your grand parents were here for 2 months. The way you switch languages depending on whom you are talking to is to be seen to be believed!

You are a total rebel and do everything I ask you not to. The other day I warned you to go brush your teeth before I count five. You were just standing staring at me. So I asked "Well, what are you waiting for?" And you said, "So start counting!" The gall! Ashu could never ever get away even with half the things that you seem to be getting away with. However hard I try to be fair, its a losing battle. Its a perk for second borns, I guess and Im not complaining! :) If I ever raise my voice at you, you proclaim that Im not your friend anymore and stomp off! Of course two minutes later, you are giving me a hug and telling me that you love me a trillion! I love you a trillion too, baby! Heres to many more birthday parties and presents to you, my little Diva! Hope all your dreams come true!  Happy Birthday!

Love,

அம்மா.

Ashu's First School Trip.

Hd and I got married one fine day in June and about 2 weeks later, he joined work. It was around 8 am and he was getting into his car and I was standing near the gate waving goodbye and felt this huge lump in my throat! Tears were about to roll down my cheeks and I did nt want him to see them so I just smiled and went inside. But he knew. We never talked about it later and even to this day, almost 13 years later, its hard for me to see him leave even if hes just going to get the mail! But of course the feeling is nt as intense as it was the first time he left and I even forgot how intense it could be and how hollow it makes you fell. Until yesterday. 

Ashu left on a school trip. Her stupid school trip! (Thats what I ve been calling it for the past one month, much to her annoyance!) I was all fine until the weekend. Then I started worrying! How will she manage! What would she do! What would I do! We bought her a new suitcase, a new sleeping bag, packed her stuff, gave her a million instructions, quizzed her on trivial things and when the day and time arrived, my dad, Hd and I walked her to school. She saw her best friend and stuck to her. The friends mom and I looked at each other and could nt say much because both of us had worry written all over our faces! The girls climbed into the bus, sat next to each other and buckled their seat belts. For a minute, I thought of grabbing her and running away! Hd was keeping an eye on me because he was sure I would do something utterly crazy! My dad kept on asking Ashu "Are you sure you want to go?" and Ashu was rolling her eyes at him! I took a photo and waved and blew her a kiss and the bus went on its way! This was Monday morning 9.40 am! I will see and hear from her next on Friday 2.30 pm! Needless to say, Im a nervous wreck! I cant even remember a day I did nt talk to Ashu in the last 8 years and now I cant hear her voice for over 3 1/2 days! I dont know what shes doing, what shes eating, what shes wearing,...! Sigh!

The house is eerily silent in spite of 4 adults and Antu! And the lump in my throat and the butterflies in my stomach are refusing to leave! Sorry Hd, the first time you left is a walk in the park compared to this one. But Im glad you are suffering along with me because I cant do this alone!

I know there would be many, many more trips and good byes but I dont think I ll ever forget this day. I dont want to.

27.04.2013

Dear Ashu,

Today I feel like I am writing to a young girl and I should watch what I write. To be honest, I never wrote any of your earlier birthday letters thinking that you would read them one day. It was just something I was feeling and wanted to put them in writing so that I can revisit them whenever I want. So far I have never showed you any of them and may be this year, I would! Not that theres any escaping from you since you would go to any lengths to read! That would be the word of the year - reading! You read every waking moment. You get cranky when we theres a delay to our library trips. You start rereading the books if a new book is not in sight. Although I am so happy and proud of you, sometimes I just want to grab the book and fling it away so that I can see your full face, see you smile, see your eyes and talk to you! Do you realize how frustrating it if for a mom to let go of her baby to a strange new world and not feel included? A series of 50 Boxcar children books? Seriously? How can I ever catch up with you?

School. Where do I even begin? We threw you in the deep end by switching schools and the way we you have progressed in German is amazing! Though I still have my doubts and sometimes I wonder why I rocked the boat, you have never ever made me feel guilty even though I know you miss your friends. You skip to school happily everyday, come home for lunch and then run again. You bring friends home even though I can talk to them only with the help of Google Translate!! Your teachers are very impressed with your progress in German and think of you as a Math Whiz! The only thing your teacher wants from you is to participate in class discussions more and to talk loudly! I did nt know whether to laugh or cry when he said that! I should record you at home one day and show him! Why do you reserve that loud voice of yours only for your family? Why should we suffer alone? So please do the needful.

Friends are coming and going and your circle is ever growing! I dont know why and you refused to give me a reason but you said you did nt want a birthday party this year. And when I kept nagging you, you said, "I dont know why you are forcing me, Amma"! So I gave up. Since the 8 girls from your dance group are quite thick and you girls performed thrice this year and are always doing something together, I suggested I take you all our for a movie as a treat and you suggested that that can be your birthday party. So "The Croods", it was and you girls had a blast! No cake, no balloons, no fancy snacks,...  But your face glowed when you opened the gifts! I dont know what to make of these mixed signals! Stop being me and tell me what you want!

I think this is the first time in your life that you did nt go to India for an entire year! Your entire seventh year outside India! Wow! But of course it meant that your grand parents, uncle and aunt visited us here and we spent a lot of time with them. You love house guests and hate it when they leave. Your only complaint is why we cant move to San Jose and live there with Perimma and Perippa! Or better, why cant you live with them?! Wish I had an answer for that. Well, there is. But then like Hanuman, I have to tear apart my chest and show you that there would be an Ashu shaped hole in my heart. My parents are here as I write this and I'm so thrilled that you will spend your birthday with our grand parents, but it also breaks my heart to see you a teeny weeny bit distant with them than before. Of course, your sister fills that void and sticks to them like glue but nevertheless its tough to realize that you are growing up and that its the age!

You are a very thoughtful girl, Ashu. And I wish you never ever let go of that quality. Whether its something I ask you to do or you think of yourself to do, you always do that little extra special which makes me feel so special. It can be a birthday card you are making for your sisters friend or for your own mother, you put your heart into it. Like the other day, there were some kids home for dinner and I asked you to set the table. And you kept the water glasses on the left except for one place and when I asked you to correct it, you said that thats for Antu since shes left handed! I was humbled by your answer. Hope you never stop amazing me, my little girl! Happy 8th birthday dear and its super special since we are in Venice celebrating your birthday on a Gondola! Happy Memories!

Love,

அம்மா.